February 29, 2004


Oh my God -- it’s true! The president really did serve fake turkey! Well, a fake president did, anyway.

The real president still has his accusers. Add movie fan Kevin Dawson to the cast of Plastic Turkey Believers:

One wonders whether our choir boy in chief will really care much for this cinematic portrayal of his personal philosopher. He’ll probably be confused by the Last Supper scene when Jesus doesn’t show up with a plastic turkey.

Mark Engler is another fakery fan:

Seeing the president in action outside of Top Gun dress rehearsals and fake turkey deliveries has been less than encouraging.

And Dr. Fakhruddin Ahmed, writing from Princeton in Bangladesh’s Daily Star, reveals the sinister source for Bush’s bogus bird:

Stage management of the President continued through his surprise Thanksgiving Day visit to Baghdad last November when it was revealed that the huge turkey with which he entered the mess hall and which he supposedly was going to serve the soldiers was fake and was supplied by his cronies at Halliburton!

Got a spare $6.75? Send one of these to your personal choice from our extensive range of plastic turkey pinheads.

Posted by Tim Blair at February 29, 2004 02:33 PM

..huge turkey with which he entered the mess hall...

The tale grows in the telling! As seen on the tape, he clearly didn't enter the mess hall with the turkey (unless "huge turkey" is a, uh, euphemism). Next thing you know we'll hear that he flew on the turkey to Baghdad, only to find out it was plastic when it burst when he cut into it. And the soldiers had to eat dirt, which caused them to grow so angry that they looted a museum. And Halliburton took the loot.

Posted by: Angie Schultz at February 29, 2004 at 02:49 PM

Anyone want to guess how many comments it will take for one of the local trolls who do not care about the plastic turkey to come in and tell us how they don't care about the plastic turkey?

Myself, I'm appalled at the level of cruelty it takes for a guy like Sheen to serve tofu turkey to anyone. Especially when he's no longer a vegetarian himself, according to the first article. Heartless bastard.

Posted by: Sortelli at February 29, 2004 at 03:05 PM

You know what this means don't you. Philips Adams was right about the turkey (although I read that the mess operators say it is traditional to have a decorative turkey when in reality they are in canteen mode.

Posted by: Louis Hissink at February 29, 2004 at 03:22 PM

I actually like the West Wing even though it's basically a liberal fantasy. The sets have a very authentic feel to them and you do get some idea of how things get done in Washington. Martin Sheen does a great job with the role even though in real life he's out of his mind when it comes to politics. You just have to separate the actor from the role.

Democrats who pine for the fictional Bartlet White House (and you'd be surprised how many do) need to realize that President Jeb Bartlet never had to deal with 9/11 since it was conveniently never written into the script. Instead he sent troops to fight a little humanitarian war in some fictional African country with no strategic value whatsoever to the U.S. -- the only kind of war liberals favor, it seems. Meanwhile his wonkish staff battles those nasty ol' Republicans on Capitol Hill to get their social agenda passed. While it does address terrorism at times (and even has Bartlet authorizing the secret assassination of a terrorist leader) it is mostly a backburner issue, which is where Democrats seem determined to leave it, if at all possible. In that respect the West Wing is a perfect reflection of liberal thought.

Posted by: Randal Robinson at February 29, 2004 at 03:44 PM


You just have to separate the actor from the role.

If only Sheen could do so. At times he seems to really believe he IS the President.

Posted by: Spiny Norman at February 29, 2004 at 06:01 PM

When will you blogheads learn, we have a plastic president with a plastic turkey in a plastic bloggy-White House! Blog away on your blogmire, blogheads all the while you plastic Reblogicans are losing their plastic power!

Besides, it was a PLASTIC Martin "Blog" Sheen.

Posted by: Quentin Divide at February 29, 2004 at 07:16 PM

OFF TOPIC YES. But i almost died laughing over this today.

Sliv says:
your not vegi are you ?
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
yes I am
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
Sliv says:
really? since when
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
like a few months ago
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
I juz cudn't stand it nemore
Sliv says:
stand killing animals?
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
yeh dat's it
Sliv says:
you feel no remorse for plants?
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
I do
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
tha'ts the problem
Mrs Himura ~*Sas=^..^=sY*~ Battosai says:
I have a constant dilema every time I eat

Posted by: Brett Milner at February 29, 2004 at 11:02 PM

Even if the turkey was plastic....so what?

I'd bet those who saw a Bush plastic turkey conspiracy, would think nothing of President Kerry(sick) doing the same thing!

Posted by: rinardman at February 29, 2004 at 11:44 PM

Even if the turkey wasn't plastic, don't you see, it's just a symbol of how Halliburton hegemony depleted uranium pipeline in Afghanistan fdrkjkasng;kntkehjkrhtaek

Posted by: Mike G at March 1, 2004 at 01:19 AM

The plastic turkey must be the longest game of Telephone ever played.

Posted by: ushie at March 1, 2004 at 03:59 AM


Posted by: Robert Thorn at March 1, 2004 at 04:36 AM

When the "Turkey Gate" scandal first broke, I saw several photos on the Internet of Bush in the serving line handing plates of sliced turkey to the troops. However, the images I had linked to have all been removed. Does anyone have working links to the actual food serving line, and not the to centerpiece?

Posted by: Siergen at March 1, 2004 at 06:22 AM

I think we should wrap the morons up in glad wrap and fry 'em all!

Posted by: koranistoiletpaper at March 1, 2004 at 06:26 AM

The meme that just will not die.

Posted by: addison at March 1, 2004 at 08:03 AM

You continue to rail against injustice wherever you find it. We're all counting on you to correct the record.

Posted by: Miranda Divide at March 1, 2004 at 08:05 AM

Leftist knuckleheads can’t claim Tim isn’t always willing to talk turkey.

Posted by: ForNow at March 1, 2004 at 08:48 AM

CBS news story with slide show with Bush serving turkey.

“Bush's Secret Mission To Iraq,” Nov. 28, 2003

The photo itself:

Posted by: ForNow at March 1, 2004 at 09:14 AM

Just watched the DVD of "Gettysburg" on the weekend and chuckled over Sheen, as General Lee, questioning that we fight "on the word of an actor?" (This was in reference to the information brought by Harrison the spy to General Longstreet regarding the location, strength, and leadership of the Union Army.)

Posted by: procrustes at March 1, 2004 at 09:33 AM

Martin Sheen can't handle his real name. How in the hell is he going to handle a fake 9/11 on TV.

By the by, who in the devil is Kevin Dalwson?

Posted by: Al Bee at March 1, 2004 at 11:01 AM

It would be nice to start something like the PLASTIC TURKEY AWARD to help honor all the hard-working people who bring us news screechers like:

Jenin Massacre .. Israelis Massacre Thousands

Coalition Forces To Be Slaughtered as they take Baghdad

Iraqis Prefer Saddam .. Coalition Go Home

Baghdad Museum Looted .. US Forces To Blame

Rachel .. The Brave Woman Who Was Murdered fighting for peace

I'd give the first award to the Iraqi Information Minister. He told us BIG LIES, and was very entertaining while telling them. The Iraq war coverage lost it's 'comic relief' when it lost him.

Posted by: Chris Josepshon at March 1, 2004 at 11:06 PM


No guessing here; the actual number is unlucky 13.

Posted by: Tongue Boy at March 2, 2004 at 12:26 AM

13 posts after yours, that is...

Posted by: Tongue Boy at March 2, 2004 at 12:26 AM

Hah! The turkey meme is back!

Note to Lefties: Simple repetition of an established untruth will not make it true. The turkey was not fake. It was best described, by someone in this blog, I think, as a "stunt turkey". Put another way, it was a real turkey, but it lacked authenticity. Its importance is precisely zero.

Note to Righties: Simple repetition of an established untruth will not make it true. Now, about those fake weapons of mass destruction. Unlike the turkey, this fabrication is of some significance.

Posted by: Nemesis at March 2, 2004 at 01:22 PM

Those fake WMDs were quite significant indeed. Saddam's fakery got his ass handed to him. It is a pity.

Anyway, I just know Nem is currently thumbing through all the falsified intelligence reports (that only he knows about) so that he can display, as Andrew Gilligan so brilliantly did before him, how the pro-war administrations "lied".

Right? You've got that evidence, right? About the lies?



Posted by: Sortelli at March 2, 2004 at 01:45 PM

(Shh! He's hunting fake wabbits!)

Posted by: Andrea Harris at March 2, 2004 at 01:50 PM

Lied? Only if you presume competence.

I did think that for quite a while, but I'm almost starting to believe it was just an amazing fuck-up.

Either way, the consequences should be clear. They lied, sack 'em. They fucked up that badly, sack 'em.

It's called accountability.

Posted by: Nemesis at March 2, 2004 at 04:22 PM

Nemesis, as I recall, even YOU thought Iraq had WMD.

You incompetent lying fuck up.

Posted by: Sortelli at March 2, 2004 at 04:58 PM

To the incompetant lying fuckup known as sortelli, when your next obsolete dictator comes up for removal, do you expect we will all just believe our fearless leaders verbatim, take the intelligence completely at face value, accept all the hyperbole as indisputable fact, "in the national interest". You, being the trusting sould your are, might.

The rest of us will now just collectively roll our eyes and say, oh, right, another pretext to bolster military spending, to comsume more military consumables, to line the pockets of big business, to fill the coffers of cronies, to divert attention from the wholesale transferance of wealth form the poor and middle class to the rich.

Noone in their right mind will ever believe anything a western politiician's reliance on intelligence ever again, or at least until the "war on terror" is won!

I look forward to three maybe four decades of disinformation.

Posted by: Miranda Divide at March 3, 2004 at 01:02 PM