June 18, 2003
NICE PLACE. TOO BAD ABOUT THE PEOPLE
Hopeless anti-American snob Bruce Elder visits Alaska:
It may be part of the US but it doesn't see itself as a part of mainstream America except for the Confederate flags (in the back windows of all those pick-ups), the patriotism and the stars-and-stripes T-shirts emblazoned with "These colours don't run" ...
Most Alaskans happily voted for George Bush because he promised to open up the state's wilderness area for oil drilling, and oil drilling is something Alaskans reckon they do very well ... As well, there seem to be only three types of males living in the state. The Willie Nelson look-alikes, the Unabomber look-alikes and the hippie refugees. All of them wear check jackets, blue jeans, boots, long hair, beards and have a rolling, slightly bandy gait. The women, in contrast, are loud, wild and tough and many have more than a passing resemblance to Roseanne Barr.
Fat yokels. No wonder they voted for Bush.
Posted by Tim Blair at June 18, 2003 12:27 PMHe sounds as bad as that writer from the UK that traveled around finding things to hate about us murric'ns and our terrible country [who just left our shores]. Ain't they just the cutest little keypounders! Where do they breed them?!
Posted by: MommaBear at June 18, 2003 at 12:46 PMWhy would Alaskans be sporting Confederate flags on their pick-up trucks? Historically, Alaska had nothing to do with either the Civil War nor the Confederacy.
Methinks that this brave fellow either does not know what a Confederate flag looks like, or is making something up.
Posted by: susan at June 18, 2003 at 12:48 PM"The women, in contrast, are loud, wild and tough and many have more than a passing resemblance to Roseanne Barr."
i wonder if he possesses sufficient cojones to return to alaska after insulting them like that
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at June 18, 2003 at 01:14 PMI should have mentioned that Elder himself is a bearded, pudgy, Roseanne-like entity. But that would have been mean.
Posted by: tim at June 18, 2003 at 01:22 PMI spent five years working on fishing boats in Alaska including King Crab boats on the Bering Sea, the world's most dangerous job. I also climbed Mt. McKinley in 1986...a 23-day expedition in one of the harshest environments imaginable. Alaska truly is one of the most incredible places on earth. It's too bad the SMH sent such a shallow twit to write about it.
Alaskans must be a terrifying breed for anti-American snobs because they ARE the stereotypical American cowboys. Everyone owns a gun in Alaska and knows how to use it. I don't know why Elder is surprised that Alaskans don't let a decent moose roadkill go to waste - summers are short, winters are hard, food is expensive, and Alaskans tend to harvest their own meat and fish when they can.
And few Americans are more isolationist or less interested in the goings-on in Paris or London (or Sydney) than Alaskans. Hell, they don't even pay much attention to what's going on in Washington, DC unless it affects them directly, and then they'll go into an ear-splitting rant about it. But it's one thing for them to bitch about the American government, it's another thing for a foreigner to start bad-mouthing America. I'm guessing that Elder kept his anti-American opinions to himself if he ever spent any time in Alaskan bars because he'd most likely be taking his food through a straw if he had.
Posted by: Randal Robinson at June 18, 2003 at 01:47 PMwhy is it that so many people who see themselves as being vaguely left-wing (& are therefore the supposed good guys) actually find 'ordinary' people so distasteful ??
Is there a theory?
I cannot say this as a fact, but I would wager the confederate flags that the hack alludes to stand for a sort of spirit of independence, not really for some of the disgusting values associated with the flag. However,I have never been to Alaska, so that is my guess. Also, I have seen the stars and bars up here in Quebec more frequently than one would imagine. I suspect up here as well it stands for independence, but from Canada. You know, the whole "Quebec is a Nation, Oui!" deal.
Posted by: Jordan at June 18, 2003 at 03:05 PMHis work as a music critic is far worse.
Posted by: Angus Young's Gibson SG at June 18, 2003 at 03:26 PMConsidering that Roseanne Barr has features sort of like an Inuit woman, don't you think that was a racist slur against Inuits?
Posted by: Mike G at June 18, 2003 at 03:45 PMI visited Alaska in 2001. Fabulous place with wonderful, warm people. Can't say I saw a single Confederate flag, and no more Stars and Stripes there than Aussie flags in Canberra. My guess is Elder felt uncomfortable breathing in that unmistakeable air of freedom and "can do" that permeates the state.
Twerp -- I'm sorry he shares my name.
Posted by: Bruce T at June 18, 2003 at 04:43 PMSpeaking as an Alaskan, I must say Elder's article is nothing but a load of tripe.
1. Many Alaskans are lower 48 expats. This is likely to explain the Confederate flag stickers on the pickups.
2. As this article states, If every Alaskan isn't armed yet, we soon will be.
3. Alaska is a very republican state. Our Governor, state rep, and both senators, Ted Stevens and Lisa Murkowski, are all republican. The state legislature itself is republican dominated. I would take a gander that this is what probably sparked the utter contempt Elder has for Alaskans.
Just imagine the reaction if a republican/conservative made the same gross generalizations as he did, but since he writes for the SMH he must actually be taken serious.
Posted by: Cody at June 18, 2003 at 04:50 PMThis dumbass is poking his head into the muzzle of one of the 36 pounders on the lower deck of the USS Lileks. Think somebody will trip the lock? Wishful thinking, probably.
Posted by: Harry at June 18, 2003 at 05:26 PMBruce Elder is a total goose. The association is plain when we deconstruct his name into - - EiDERdown.
Doesn't or didn't he also work for the ABC? (aka the Absolutely Biased Corporation)
Nuff said?
Posted by: Spacer_8 at June 18, 2003 at 06:58 PMSo, what's the problem with what Elder wrote?
Did anyone actually read the article?
You really have to be desperately seeking offence to react that way to a pretty innocuous and positive piece like this. This is exactly the same sort of shameless pursuit of victimhood that Tim routinely (and rightly) bags in others.
Also, note the Maureen Dowd-like elision to make it sound like Elder was drawing a link between the physical appearance of the Alaskans he saw and their voting habits. In fact, the two sentences blended together in Tim's second paragraph are no less than SIX paragraphs apart.
You know, Tim, sometimes you do a great job of calling the kettle black, but I wish you'd try to be less of a pot.
Posted by: Mork at June 18, 2003 at 09:38 PMthe problem, mork, is that while he clearly admires alaska's natural beauty he uses it as a foil for what he doesn't: her american citizens. he oozes condescension from every orifice he's got while talking about 'mainstream america' whose symbol is of course the confederate flag. what is he, michael moore drunk on fosters?
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at June 18, 2003 at 10:16 PMJust a note to show that metropolitan elitism is not limited to ideological proponents on the left, here's a comment from NYC dwelling self-styled "Metrocon" conservative, John Derbyshire, from February 24, 2002:
SKI REPORT [John Derbyshire]
Survived a week on the ski slopes with the family. Two minor observations. (1) Yes, Virginia, there is a black middle class. When I started skiing in the USA (1986) it was a rare thing to see a black face in the ski-lift line. Now the ski slopes look like America. Well, like blue-state America anyway. The contrast between us sleek metropolitan elites on the lift line and the locals manning (more often, womanning) the concessions, is still striking. Catskills women average about 300 lbs, have skin conditions and gaps in their teeth. The men go for ponytails, scraggly semi-beards, baseball caps, and tattoos. Yep, we are two nations.
Posted 3:26 PM | [Link]
I suppose we mountain country folk can then make "minor observations" about city dwellers based on the rude, reckless cab drivers, crack-smoking druggies, and toothless, stinking, street-dwelling bums that infest our nation's urban populations, the next time I visit NY to catch a show, eh, Derb?
Posted by: Ray Eckhart at June 18, 2003 at 10:29 PMRiiight . . . so if I go out to the sticks and see a bunch of fat people, I can't write about it - even if it's the truth - because I'd be guilty of "metropolitan elitism".
Fuck, who said political correctness was dying! It's just found a new constituency!
Posted by: Mork at June 18, 2003 at 10:52 PMNo, Mork, you can write about it, but don't be surprised if folks get a tad pissy when you use your writings about the fat people to make yourself and others "like you" look better than you actually are.
It's not subject matter here, it's tone. When you're a condescending prick in print and people call you on it, it's not political correctness run amuck, it's polite society giving you some pointers. Although, they might not be too polite about the "giving" part...
Posted by: BAW at June 18, 2003 at 11:24 PMNo, Mork, you can write about it, but don't be surprised if folks get a tad pissy when you use your writings about the fat people to make yourself and others "like you" look better than you actually are.
It's not subject matter here, it's tone. When you're a condescending prick in print and people call you on it, it's not political correctness run amuck, it's polite society giving you some pointers. Although, they might not be too polite about the "giving" part...
Posted by: BAW at June 18, 2003 at 11:25 PMDangit--posted twice, dunno why. Sorry about the noob error.
Posted by: BAW at June 18, 2003 at 11:26 PMat least he didn't find a bunch of eskimos in snow houses.
Confederate flags? Lots of Okie oil workers, I suspect.
I wonder if he knew that Alaska was invaded in World War II and some native Alaskan were POW's? And that Alaska has 17 percent of the population that is veterans, the hightest percentage of any state...
Mork,
Let's put it in reverse. Suppose as a writer I go to Australia and write a story of how beautiful the scenery is and how great Australia is execept for the drunks and the people riding around with rainbow stickers on their cars.
What fascinates me is why Elder finds it important to demean this woman by pointing out his opinion of what see looks like. There a several adjectives this so-called professional journalist could have used to make his point about this woman. Why did he feel compelled to insult her and everyone else in Alaska. Sheesh, what a bed-wettin' asshole. He's lucky he didn't go home with his teeth in his pocket.
Posted by: D2D at June 19, 2003 at 01:11 AM> stars-and-stripes T-shirts emblazoned with "These colours don't run"
Stars-and-stripes and "colours"? How cosmopolitan.
Posted by: Bob Hawkins at June 19, 2003 at 02:05 AMD2D - if you come to Australia and that's what you see, then that's exactly what you should write. Plenty have.
This is the thing: what Tim has done here is EXACTLY what those do whom we accuse of exhibiting political correctness. He's seen a piece by this writer, who he PRESUMES to be anti-american, and then searched it LOOKING for something that he can get offended about. And with that mindset, of course, as soon as you see anything that it less than completely positive, it is transmogrified from what is at worst, an impolite observation, into a revalation of the writer's deep-seated prejudices.
And, of course, this manifestation of political correctness, like the other, comes complete with a howling chorus of similarly sensitive little munchkins, ever ready to take offence, who need only be pointed in the right direction to let loose their self-pitying caterwaul.
And, BTW, is no-one else annoyed that Tim used MoDo's trick to completely distort the meaning of what he quoted? I guess not . . .
Posted by: Mork at June 19, 2003 at 10:13 AMI lived in Alaska for two years back in the early 70's and loved it. Spent most of my time at Fairbanks smack in the center of the state. Got to travel a bit by road and river. Drove the road between Fairbanks and Anchorage before it was finished!
Alaska is almost all outback. Think of Alaska as an Australia where it is easier to keep beer cold.
Posted by: Fred Boness at June 19, 2003 at 11:17 AMone does not need to 'search' this article; one merely needs to read it. i don't think these are 'impolite observations' but rather do reveal a prejudice. in the midst of a very positive article he can not resist a sneer at the people. what if he wrote 'france is a lovely place; if only the people would bathe' or perhaps 'the natural beauty of south africa is breath taking, and the women all look like aunt jemima'? well, ok, the france bit no-one will find fault with, but the point holds. i think tim's title accurately sums up the peace.
'modo's trick'? i don't think so. from:
"That said, most Alaskans happily voted for George Bush because he promised to open up the state's wilderness area for oil drilling, and oil drilling is something Alaskans reckon they do very well. There's also the small matter of the cheque that every Alaskan citizen receives each year, representing a percentage of the profits generated by the state's vast oil reserves. It is usually about $US2000 ($3000). That's a $US2000 bonus just for staying in Alaska for a year."
and
"As well, there seem to be only three types of males living in the state. The Willie Nelson look-alikes, the Unabomber look-alikes and the hippie refugees. All of them wear check jackets, blue jeans, boots, long hair, beards and have a rolling, slightly bandy gait. The women, in contrast, are loud, wild and tough and many have more than a passing resemblance to Roseanne Barr."
tim got what he quoted. in what possible sense did he distort or change the meaning in such a manner as to 'annoy' your tender sensibilities? us similarly sensitive munchkins are dying to know in the midst of our self-pitying caterwauls.
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at June 19, 2003 at 11:33 AMMr. Bingley: Tim's presentation implies that the writer draws a link between the voting preferences of Alaskans and their appearance and lack of sophistication. That is the basis of his editorial comment at the bottom of the entry.
Of course, if you read the piece, the writer does no such thing. When he notes that Alaska voted for Bush, he explains why it is a rational choice based on their self-interest.
Then, SEVEN PARAGRAPHS LATER, he reports a completely unrelated observation about the physical appearance of the people he saw.
To suggest that the writer drew the link, or even suggested the conclusion, that Tim asserts is simply dishonest.
Posted by: Mork at June 19, 2003 at 11:53 AMTim expressed an opinion -- in an eight word quip -- about the writer's motivations. Expressing personal opinion what he does in this blog. It's not a frigging news outlet. I mean -- hello?
Btw, I defy you to place the b.s. about every male in alaska resembling willie nelson, the unabomber, or a relictual hippie into a non-comedic context where it's not a gleaming badge of ignorant assholery. Go ahead -- give it a try.
Posted by: Harry at June 19, 2003 at 01:20 PMUm . . . Harry . . . I think it WAS in a comedic context.
As for "it's only Tim's opinion". No shit. And I've given mine. And mine's more rational, principled and consistent than Tim's. So there you go.
Man, the most disturbing thing about political bulletin boards and comment pages like this is that you realize how few people are able/inclined to think for themselves, rather than parroting whatever they hear from their current gurus.
Posted by: Mork at June 19, 2003 at 01:36 PMHey! Mork is more rational and principled than Tim because... he said so! Well, hell, if I had known it was that easy to claim a win, I'd have done it ages ago.
I'm better and smarter and prettier than you all! So there! And I'm not parrotting someone else's viewpoint, unlike you sheeple -- I'm Thinking For Myself! I'm an Individual™ (v. 2.3), just like everyone else!
Posted by: Andrea Harris at June 19, 2003 at 03:43 PMNo, Andrea, Mork is more rational and principled than Tim because he manages to stick to the principles he requires of others.
If you think I'm wrong, why don't you have a go at explaining why that is. . . or does that question answer itself?
And, finally, a small suggestion: maybe you should leave the satire to Tim, who actually has a talent for it.
Posted by: Mork at June 19, 2003 at 04:28 PM"Mork is more rational and principled than Tim because he manages to stick to the principles he requires of others."
Dang, that there's one massive ego you have. It's so massive you have to refer to yourself in the third person. That's impressive.
Posted by: Andrea Harris at June 19, 2003 at 04:43 PMHmmmm . . . do you have anything to say on whether I'm right about Tim's inconsistency, or does your analysis start and finish with playground insults?
And, my dear, I am only referring to "myself" in the third person if "Mork" is my real name.
How likely do you think that is?
Posted by: Mork at June 19, 2003 at 05:27 PMIf the men all dress alike, all have long hair and beards and all walk alike, how can the writer tell the Willie Nelson lookalikes from the Unabomber lookalikes from the hippie refugees? What are the distinguishing characteristics, as Paula Jones put it.
Posted by: Joanne Jacobs at June 19, 2003 at 06:52 PMFrom Mork:
“Tim ... you do a great job.”
“Tim ... is ... a ... complete ... writer.”
“Tim's presentation ... is ... the basis of ... sophistication.”
Thanks, Morky!
Posted by: tim at June 19, 2003 at 07:45 PMTim, you're welcome. I always try to be as generous as possible.
But the quotes you chose leave a very one-side impression of what I wrote. Why, for example, did you not cite the following:
"Tim . . . you . . . shameless . . . Maureen Dowd-like . . .(f)uck!"
Posted by: Mork at June 19, 2003 at 08:11 PM"To suggest that the writer drew the link, or even suggested the conclusion, that Tim asserts is simply dishonest."
what, are there two completely separate populations in alaska that he is refering to?
"Of course, if you read the piece, the writer does no such thing."
i read it several times, your grace, but evidently i needn't have as you alone seem able to supply the correct interpretation.
"When he notes that Alaska voted for Bush, he explains why it is a rational choice based on their self-interest."
i.e. the only reason anyone would ever vote for bush is so they can cash in on oil revenues and raping of pristine wilderness. go figure!
"To suggest that the writer drew the link, or even suggested the conclusion, that Tim asserts is simply dishonest"
no, it's a valid and supportable one that you happen to disagree with.
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at June 19, 2003 at 10:45 PMI lived in Alaska five years too. The flag I saw most often was the state flag. Having never been to Texas by then except once to change planes, I wondered whether the state flag would be more or less visible there.
On a per capita basis, judging from a week spent in Fort Worth, Alaska wins hands down.
Oh, and Mork is full of shazbat.
Posted by: McGehee at June 20, 2003 at 12:56 AMMork, reading Elder's diatribe again ( managed not to vomit this time) , physical caricature, oil, republican,voted for Bush,snide remarks on character and IQ of Alaskans, are grammatically bound to-gether - pretty well impossible to mistake the communisto vitriolic garbage Elder wrote.
Comments like, `...he explains it is a rational choice...' convey Elder has been terribly decent and reasonable when plainly he is not in that article.
"And, my dear, I am only referring to "myself" in the third person if "Mork" is my real name."
I take it you flunked logic class there, Mork. If you're talking about yourself in the third person, it doesn't really, uh, matter whether it's your real name, stage name, pseudonym, etc., as long as you're...well, talking about yourself. In the third person. Which you were, but under your nom du internet. Ipso facto. Why is that difficult?
Posted by: jeremy at June 21, 2003 at 09:18 AM