Tim Blair

Well clearly he had to use a frame of reference that Republicans would understand. After all, it worked for you, Tim...

Are you sure about that, ancient one? Kerry was speaking to the Democratic National Convention, after all, and not to the RNC.

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

sorry, I just had to say that to get it out of my head

OK, folks, let's help EvilPundit!

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

John Kerry says, "I'm allergic to Botox."

Oh come on, did you check the kick-ass, stinger-proof suit NASA made him? Kerry may be soft on terrorism but he is unshakably resolved to confront the menace of bee people.

"Help is on its way", where have I heard that before? I know. The source is:
Pseudo American;
Just enough talent to be a convincing copy cat;
Well past prime;
Nothing memorable to say; and
Not worth more than five minutes of fame.
Let's hear it for the outfit that must have inspired John Kerry -- The Little River Band (named after a hamlet in Tim Blair's neighbourhood).

"What's it like inside the bubble?
Does your head ever give you trouble?"

Have you heard about the Lonesome Loser?
Beaten by the Queen of Hearts every time.
Have you heard about the Lonesome Loser?
He's a loser but he still keeps on trying.

Sit down, take a look at yourself
Don't you want to be somebody?
Someday somebody's gonna see inside
You have to face up, you can't run and hide.

Never mind that "help is on the way," is it true that "love is in the air"?

Help is on the way...unless the bell in the servant's quarters is out of order.

"help is on the way" GWB used the phrase in his 2000 RNC acceptance speech referring to the fact that the US armed forces would no longer be neglected and vilified.

"help is on the way" GWB used the phrase in his 2000 RNC acceptance speech referring to the fact that the US armed forces would no longer be neglected and vilified

Well he didnt do a very good job then did he? reservists have to buy their own armor to go into Iraq. And there's no way that you can say that US forces are more liked world wide

caspian, who cares if US forces are liked around the world? That's John Kerry and his fellow Oompa Loompa's talking. The military does not exist as an international social group. The military doesn't want to be liked, it needs to earn respect. Respect accomplishes the mission and keeps people alive better than some international leftoid circle jerk.

And, gee, why is there a vest shortage? How many years ago was it that most soldiers didn't have ballistic protection at all? Hmmmmm, less than 4 years ago! The program to get those vests for the entire military really wasn't started until after Bush was elected. Although the initial research and development started well before that. It's a shame that some reservists had to buy their own vests, but speaking as a reservist myself, that's not Bush's fault, it's a problem with how the Army does their business....which is changing under Bush.

Morale is much higher now. At least we have reservist to go into I-raq. Four years under algore and we'd we wouldn't have any forces left to fight with. Slight overstatment intentionaly made. I wouldn't question the fortitude of our armed forces. And nobody gives a bleep whether their liked or not. This isn't an international lovein. Go sing "give peace a chance" somewhere else. We're all full here!

"And there's no way that you can say that US forces are more liked world wide."

In order to be approved and liked by the international community (one of Kerry's goals), we'll have to grovel and kiss the feet of the blood suckers at the UN and the elite of the EU.

No thanks. My safety is more important than the approval of the international community.

It's important that *we* support and approve of our troops and let them know we do. They are all doing a great job.

(I'd like it if those who want to kill all of us feared our troops enough to never bother us, or any of our allies, again.)

LOL! Real Jeffs and Chris. We have the most EFFECTIVE fighting force the world has ever known. I would wager that there are more than one or two dictators around the world that were more than alittle impressed. That impressive show of force will go alot farther in preventing future conflicts than all of the peacenik chants combined. Oompa loompa's!!??

Caspian,

The point was that the military was vilified by the Clinton/Gore Administration, not our enemies. Defense Secretary Aspin left them in Mogadishu without armor, so that they would be "liked" for not appearing heavy handed. The result of that lame brained PR move was 19 dead Rangers and Special Forces.

Despite that, the mission was successful but the soldiers were withdrawn anyway so Clinton snatched defeat from the jaws of victory and inspired Osama bin Laden to other atrocities.

And another thing...I never liked that "No Surrender" song of Springsteen's. It was filler on the album and the phrase is a motto of Ulster paramilitaries and Chelsea skinheads.

I think a Morrisey/Smiths ditty might be more appropriate for Lurch and the Democrats; like "Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now".

A famous European political philospher (therefore obviously nuanced, experienced, and to be absolutely trsuted) said: "It is better to be feared than loved."

So, I guess if people fear US forces, that's a good thing - thanks for the advice Europe.

"Why the long face"?

Probably 'cause he's closer to being exposed as a fraud..check it out

Swift Boat Veterans for Truth

http://www.swiftvets.com/

Who wants to place bets on the moment when caspian's polite facade disintegrates and he does a carlos-morph into just another troll?

I predict all we need is another post on Israel.

Speaking of Israel. That may be one of the better side benefits of the "evil" American force presence in the "region". We can now act as a possible "tipping point" of stability in the region. Israel will not let Iran build that nuclear (nucular) reactor. They have only one possible way of accomplishing that feat, with bigtime impications. The other is that Basher bozo in Syria. If he throws something bad at Isreal the world,as we know it, will have changed forever since Israel will institute instant and permanent global warming in the region. I leave that to Caspian to contemplate. Bye the bye, the Euros' actually like our conventional forces, they just want to be the ones to control them and not the "evil cowboy". Right now we have fear, respect for our power and the resolve to use it on our side. Kerry and his happy little band are doing their best to nullify that hard earned ground!

"Help is on the way," ... is this link fair?

I knew caspian would be the type to get on my nerves. Does he expect our guys to shoot flowers out of water pistols at the bad guys, so they'll be "liked"?

..well he didnt do a very good job then did he? reservists have to buy their own armor to go into Iraq...

And how is that the President's fault, Caspian?

The shortfall in Iraq occurred because the military's need for body armor outstripped its ability to make and deliver the Interceptor plates, said Mr. Nelson, the Army's deputy product manager for outfitting soldiers. The Army had boosted production to supply soldiers fighting in Afghanistan when planning for the Iraq war began in earnest last year, Mr. Nelson said

The guys who went to Kososvo didn't have the inteceptor plates at all, if I had been sent in country I was planning on borrowing my brother's vest (he's a county sherrif) and...wait a minute, you mean the rest of the world doesn't LIKE ME?
I....I...I...

[sound of running feet, slamming doors, and sobbing coming from the monkeyroom.]

I noticed yesterday in the elevator at work a sign that said "If the light is flashing, help is on the way."

Holy crap! If I get stuck in the elevator, the John's will head in to help me?

Holy crap! If I get stuck in the elevator, the John's will head in to help me?

Um, no, but according to this, he will comfort and console you after your ordeal.

I can still see him now, standing in the doorway of the pilothouse, firing his M-16, shouting orders through the smoke and chaos . . . Even wounded, or confronting sights no man should ever have to see, he never lost his cool.

I had to sit on my hands [after a firefight], I was shaking so hard . . . He went to every man on that boat and put his arm around them and asked them how they're doing. I've never had an officer do that before or since. That's the mettle of the man, John Kerry.

I think French troops are liked worldwide. Just ask the people of Ivory Coast, Liberia, Algeria, Vietnam...

he will comfort you sis, but only if you have a camera

tree hugging sister — Great way to cherry-pick that article. By the way, your link doesn't work.

And question — if that was the real John Kerry, who was the man who abandoned the Filipina election workers to their fate during the Aquino/Marcos election?

here's the working link.

i think you need to turn up your irony meter there richard, btw.

Mr. Bingley, you are a gentleman and a scholar. (Please forgive me for the thieving rat bastard post. It was rude and unforgivable ~ I'm ashamed, appalled and abashed) Thank you for fixing the link, as I'm working 'twixt two 'puters, when barely able to handle one.

And, yet again, I neglected to the put [winkwink nudge nudge] [/winkwink nudgenudge] at the end, thinking the sardonic nature of the post would be...well...obvious. Piffle.

i've never had a problem with the thieving rat bastard moniker; my concern has always been to which particular instance you were refering.

Which I will, posthaste, never refer to again, dear Mr. Bingley, you minivan driving, sensitive, 90's Bon Jovi sort of male and all...

And Richard, you're absolutely right. The Kerry you're referring to would be this one?

Village Voice reporter Joe Conason and I had been tipped off about the walkout, and when we got to the church, we found Bea Zobel, one of Cory Aquino's top aides, in a tizzy. "The women are terrified," she said. "They're scared to go home. They don't know what to do. We don't know what to do." Joe and I suggested that Mrs. Zobel go to the Manila Hotel and bring back some members of the Congressional observer team. She came back with Kerry, who did nothing.

Kerry later said that he didn't talk to the COMELEC employees then because he wasn't allowed to. [A bone-head Rolling Stone fact-checker sent the article to Kerry's Senate office for comment. Kerry staffers were wroth
and insisted the senator's version of events be included.] This is ridiculous. He was ushered into an area that had been cordoned off from the press and the crowd and where the computer operators were sitting. To talk to the women, all he would have had to do was raise his voice. Why he was reluctant, I can't tell you. I can tell you what any red-blooded representative of the U.S. Government should have done. He should have shouted, "If you're frightened for your safety, I'll take you to the American embassy, and damn the man who tries to stop me." But all Kerry did was walk around like a male model in a concerned and thoughtful pose.

Then I hear he buggered out. From the Weekly Standard, and well worth reading the whole article. I apologise if I was churlish.

damn you for a traitorous cur, tree hugger! i fully expect such malicious personal-transportation-related comments from the ever-so-unhip ken, but from you! after i so valiantly rose to your defense! i'm shocked, shocked i say!

Plus... he's objectifying arab women. Is thet where they get that "making our women sterile with american ching gum" thing?

But all Kerry did was walk around like a male model in a concerned and thoughtful pose.

That's been his M.O. for the 20 years I've followed this huckster...

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

Says he: "I wanted whipped cream and she insisted on ketchup!"

The plagarism doesn't stop:

Gir, reporting for duty!

(Though Kerry didn't run around the stage yelling "WOOOOOHOOO! I'M RUNNING! I'M RUNNING!");-)

Ummmm...perhaps I missed it somewhere in the preceeding 40 comments, but I believe it should be pointed out, in the interest of being factual, that "Help is on the Way" was a minor Bush/Cheney slogan in 2K.

Kerry/Edwards employed "Hope is on the Way" at the convention.

Just so everyone here is clear on me: Kerry is a pantywaisted, French-looking poopyhead. Again, that interest in being factual.

Cordially...

Rick,

I think it was Dick Cheney who told the military in 2000 that "Help is on the way".

John Edwards said in 2004 "Hope is on the way" (whatever that means).

Then John Kerry said, "Help is on the way" (same as Cheney).

During the Edwards and then Kerry speeches, delegates held up pre-printed placards with the slogan(s) of the respective speaker.

More importantly, Kerry/Edwards have, while calling Bush a modern day Herbert Hoover (FDR's predecessor; blamed for the Great Depression) coopted the program that the Republican Hoover tried to combat the Depression with--Raise taxes and institute protectionist tariffs. It didn't work in the 1930's and would be even more disasterous now.

Rick

No one like the fence sitter.

I wonder if those Phillipino women that Kerry refused to help are still alive?

Righto, I'll give it a go.

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

Says he: "Even the French think I look like a horses arse!"

I think that Americans worry far too much about about being liked in the world. The top dog will always be either hated or envied. This clip from a recent read sums it up:

"tyranny? Had he not given away at least a trillion dollars ﷓in aid? Had he not picked up the hundred billion dollars a year defence tab for Western Europe for five decades? What justified the hate﷓you﷓hate﷓you demonstrations, the sacked embassies, the burnt flags, the vicious placards?

It was an old British spymaster who explained it to him in a London Club in the late Sixties as Vietnam became nastier and nastier and the riots erupted.

'My dear boy, if you were weak you would not be hated. If you were poor you would not be hated. You are not hated despite the trillion dollars; you are hated because of the trillion dollars.'

The old mandarin gestured towards Grosvenor Square where left﷓wing politicians and bearded students were massing to stone the embassy.

'The hatred of your country is not because it attacks theirs; it is because it keeps theirs safe. Never seek popularity. You can have supremacy or be loved but never both. What is felt towards you is ten per cent genuine disagreement and ninety per cent envy.

'Never forget two things. No man can ever forgive his protector. There is no loathing that any man harbours more intense than that towards his benefactor.'

The old spy was long dead, but Devereaux had seen the truth of his cynicism in half a hundred capitals. Like it or not, his country was the most powerful in the world. Once the Romans had that dubious honour. They had responded to the hatred with ruthless force of arms. A hundred years ago the British Empire had been the rooster they had responded to the hatred with languid contempt. Now the Americans had it, and they racked their consciences to where they had gone wrong. The Jesuit scholar and secret agent had long made up his mind. In defence of his country he would do what he believed had to be done…………."

If they don't like you, screw 'em, they've got no taste.

Caspian: at one time, if asked what was the military's task, the preferred answer (at the top of one's lungs) was, "Sir! To kill the enemy and break (or blow up, depending on branch of service) his shit, Sir!" I'm pretty sure that still holds. Don't remember shouting, "Sir! To be really liked, Sir!" YMMV

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"

Says he: "By the way, when I was in Viet Nam,...."

Rick. I thought it was GWB, but if was Cheney no matter. I would disagree with the "minor slogan" aspect though. It was an important message to the military after eight years under Clinton/Gore. Both men(GWB,Cheney) were saying that they had a deep respect for the role that the military had played in the history of the country and that they, more importantly, would not abuse that respect and their role by deploying them to cover up Grand Jury testimony or Monica problems etc. (Did I just create a run on sentence alert?) If they were deployed it would be for national security purposes and not to shoot at the butt of a camel in some desert tent.

Yes I know. Just missed him by minutes or seconds, or whatever. Everyone knows what I meant.

Not the first time that GWB will be compared with Hebert Hoover, with thanks to the Dept of Commerce - Bureau of Labor Statistics, that supplied the unemployment percentages that the Demos use in making that comparison. Interestingly enough, according to the same set of stats, the unemployment percentage was lower under Nixon than under Kennedy. I would what the Demos would say about that?

Mr. Bingley, tree hugging sister... you could be right. It's been a long week. Sorry if I misconstrued...

And speaking of Disney: if they're both dogs, why does Goofy walk on two legs while Pluto is on all fours?

Tree hugging sister, per your 12:45 comment, all that emotion was engendered by the fact that they were trying to dock. It was rough back then.

it's all good richard!

but she's still a traitorous cur, dagnabbit!

Nice little article on Vietnam's appreciation of John Kerry.

http://ice.he.net/~freepnet/kerry/staticpages/index.php?page=20040531140357545

Juvenile Fiction pretty much sums up Kerry!
Flush the Johns!

Tim Blair you're the best!

John Kerry...That's scaring the crap out of me