June 14, 2004
FREE RANGE SENATOR
The hamster is out of his cage:
Sen. John F. Kerry has apparently never heard that nobody walks in Los Angeles.
In town for his daughter's film school graduation Tuesday, the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee had a hankering for what aides described as a "quiet stroll" through the neighborhood around his Westwood hotel.
As Kerry headed back to his hotel, he passed a couple of medical students wearing white jackets. One stared in apparent disbelief. "That's John Kerry," the man said. The woman with him asked: "Who's John Kerry?"
Meanwhile, in other caged hamster developments:
If you tease a caged hamster, handle it badly, or poke your fingers into its cage, it may nip you. Usually the bite is so quick and small that the shock hurts more than the wound.
Ouch! Purple heart!
Posted by Tim Blair at June 14, 2004 06:52 PMTO: Tim Blair
RE: That Woman
She's either a Valley Girl or Kerry isn't handsome enough to be able to care the women's vote.
Regards,
Chuck(le)
Posted by: Chuck Pelto at June 14, 2004 at 07:35 PMDamn, Chuckle, did you have to blow dried mold off that joke?
Posted by: Andrea Harris at June 14, 2004 at 07:59 PMWhy do you bother posting such dribble. You fucked up on your assertions that Kerry was having an affair. Now you wank on with more dribble about Kerry not being recognized by some woman on the street in LA.
Haven't you figured out yet that most of the public really don't give a shit about politics. And it's only vacuous minor bores like you that think you have anything to add to the political debate that take it all so seriously.
Face it Tim, you're an unemployable journalist that no one in this country would give a serious job to.
Sure you get a few crappy OpEd opportunities thrown to you. But every dog needs a bone to keep it quiet.
But when was the last time anyone in the real world actually gave you a commission to write a real article and not some piece of crap to pad out the back pages with.
Instead you are stuck here with your crappy blog site vomiting out your endless bile at those who don't conform to your thinking.
What a fucking failure you.
In fact you are the complete definition of the failed Gen Xer. No kids. No career, No home.
Just endless hours at the bars on Friday night in search of some skirt.
Maybe you should ask that other Gen Xer you so much deride - Mark Latham - for a job. You never know the combination of two failures might make for a successful team.....
Posted by: Jack Lang at June 14, 2004 at 08:08 PMThat's a lot of words about someone you dislike so much, "Jack"
I think maybe you is BIT-TER, girlfriend!
Posted by: goldsmith at June 14, 2004 at 08:50 PMJack, have a break. This is pretty funny. Those dems are always so bitter and angry, they're seldom funny. It's their greatest weakness.
Posted by: Berend de Boer at June 14, 2004 at 08:53 PMJack:
It was the New York Times that described John Kerry as a “caged hamster.” You might have heard of the NYT, it is the paper of record that pays commissions to write “real” articles and employs “real” journalists.
I use to have one of those hamster bubbles. Lots of fun for the cat.
Posted by: Papertiger at June 14, 2004 at 09:18 PMJack Lang is clearly incoherent and bitter.
Perhaps it's because he knows he's illiterate, but doesn't know how to correct the problem.
Have faith Jack, each journey begins with a single step. Here's the first one. The word you have heard being used by literate people is "drivel". You heard the word as "dribble". Dribble is the stuff coming out of your mouth as you type. The stuff you type is drivel.
No need to thank me, I'm glad to help.
Posted by: tripebuster at June 14, 2004 at 09:40 PMSheesh Jack, did your girlfriend leave you? Lighten up. Tim's blog doesn't post on demand.
Posted by: Quentin George at June 14, 2004 at 10:11 PMJL you say: "Just endless hours at the bars on Friday night in search of some skirt" like it's a bad thing?
Posted by: Dean McAskil at June 14, 2004 at 11:09 PM"No kids. No career, No home.
Just endless hours at the bars on Friday night in search of some skirt."
I'm jealous.
It would be even more jealous if Tim posted pictures of these various "skirts" - because I hear Australian women are really fine.
Posted by: Sergio at June 14, 2004 at 11:36 PM>>vomiting out your endless bile at those who don't conform to your thinking
Jack, need a little self-understanding you?
Jack Lang is obviously homoerotically drawn to John Kerry. Nothing else explains the 'lay off my girlfriend' vehemence of his comment.
If 'Jack Lang' is an internet alias, it's an appropriate one. A slightly unhinged traitor to his class and a bona fide Labor rat, New South Wales Premier Jack Lang was sacked by the Governor in 1932. The only loser ever sacked from the Premiership in Australia, he subsequently became a hero to failed Prime Minister, Paul Keating, also known to be slightly balmy.
Marvellous symmetry.
Posted by: CurrencyLad at June 15, 2004 at 12:57 AMSo when Hunter Thompson writes his drug-addled fear-and-loathing screed about this year's election, will he have to write about traveling with the Grey Hamster instead of the Brown Buffalo?
Posted by: richard mcenroe at June 15, 2004 at 01:36 AMYes, Oktober, it's true, Kerry was in 'Nam. A recently revealed fact is that his radio call sign was "Horrible Hamster".
Posted by: The Real JeffS at June 15, 2004 at 02:38 AMReal JeffS: You've never heard of the terrible battle for Hamsterberger Hill?
Posted by: gnotalex at June 15, 2004 at 04:12 AMTim,
Revive the recent contest where you have to post the 2nd sentence on the 2nd page.....whatever. Only this change: people must quote from the first book they can get their hands on about hamsters.
TO: Andrea Harris
RE: Damn!??!?!
"Damn, Chuckle, did you have to blow dried mold off that joke?" -- Andrea Harris
Nope. I grew it myself. Right here in the compost barrel I call a brain.
Regards,
Chuck(le)
Posted by: Chuck Pelto at June 15, 2004 at 05:03 AMP.S. Mold can be your friend. Penicillin, anyone?
Posted by: Chuck Pelto at June 15, 2004 at 05:04 AMP.P.S. But sometimes it isn't. I'm preparing to do battle with a blight on my tomato bushes, even as we 'speak'.
Posted by: Chuck Pelto at June 15, 2004 at 05:08 AMI think jack perfectly demonstrates the Lefty view of the world. He believes that Tim should post what jack thinks should be posted instead of what Tim wants to post.
Probably jack wants a Really Big Central Bureau of Blog Posting which could tell all bloggers what to (and what not to) post. Obviously blogs are much to dangerous to be allowed into unwise hands.
Posted by: JorgXMcKie at June 15, 2004 at 06:01 AMTO: JorgXMcKie
RE: Yeah...
"Probably jack wants a Really Big Central Bureau of Blog Posting which could tell all bloggers what to (and what not to) post." -- JorgXMcKie
...just like the head of the Columbia Broadcasting System (CBS) is telling all the subsidiaries to 'post' about Clinton's book.
See Drudge for the gory details.
Regards,
Chuck(le)
Posted by: Chuck Pelto at June 15, 2004 at 08:42 AMgnotalex, wasn't that battle the background for the movie, "Full Metal Hamster"?
Posted by: The Real JeffS at June 15, 2004 at 09:26 AM"God couldn't miracle your hamster ass over that obstacle! Get the fuck off of my obstacle!"
- Lee Ermey in Full Metal Hamster
Posted by: CurrencyLad at June 15, 2004 at 10:34 AMJack Lang: somebody needs a hug!
Chuckle ("Chuck") Pelto: wow, you posted twice without the cute "memo" heading or signing your name in your post! There's hope for you yet. Try inhaling a bit more of that fungicide.
Posted by: Andrea Harris at June 15, 2004 at 11:05 AMThe Hamster article is true though. I was feeding one some cheese once, and the little rodent took a chunk out of my thumb, chewed and ate it with evidence of enjoyment.
I've been bitten by Spiders and Snakes, and been stung by Scorpions, but only the Hamster took a piece out of me.
Hamsters can be treacherous little bastards, and are more dangerous than they appear. And talking about Senator Kerry...
TO: Andrea Harris
RE: Those Were....
....Post Script.
RE: Imbibing
The fungicide isn't quite ready yet. Needs to steep for a few more hours. It probably would go well with adequate rum. It's half molasses, half dried milk with a dash of baking soda.
This will be the first effort at using a collection of simple, eco-friendly techniques for dealing with garden problems. Passed another recipe to a friend who has trouble with deer munching on his garden up near Denver.
We'll see how these things work out.
Regards,
Chuck(le)
Posted by: Chuck Pelto at June 15, 2004 at 12:42 PMHey, how come nobody's pointed out that hamsters are prey? I found out the hard way when my daughter apparently didn't close the cage quite right one night, and the next morning I stepped on a piece of raw meat in my bare feet. Just then I noticed several of our other pets licking their chops.
We never could find that hamster. Kerry should mind his cage.
Posted by: cat owner at June 15, 2004 at 02:24 PMTo: Pelto
Re: Deer problem
Date: uh
Time: night
Subject: I already said it
(I put the content here? Okay okay -- don't nudge!) Yeah. Deer. Venison sounds like an idea, you know. Mmmm, Bambi burger.
Regards and salutations,
(A)ndre(a) H(you know the rest)
Hey, look at all the screen real estate I can waste. Anyone fall asleep yet? Hello... hello...
Posted by: Andrea Harris at June 15, 2004 at 02:34 PMTO: Andrea Harris
RE: Yeah...
...we all dream of that, but without a license and especially out of season, it's awfully expensive if you're caught.
Regards,
Chuck(le)
[Support your right to arm bears.]
Hell, John Kerry doesn't even know who John Kerry is. That's why he's always cutting in line, asking perfect strangers "Do You Know Who I Am?!!"
Shouldn't he should work out his identity issues BEFORE running for president?
Posted by: Noel at June 16, 2004 at 12:07 AM