April 19, 2004

GREAT MINDS OF OUR TIME

Hamas has got some kind of super-genius production line, endlessly delivering brilliant leaders. The Age claims:

Abdel Aziz al-Rantissi was a cool and calculating intellectual force in Hamas.

And in the SMH:

Khaled Mashaal, who has emerged as the paramount figure in Hamas following the assassination of Abdel-Aziz al-Rantissi by Israel, is a hardline militant who favours a military solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

Mashaal is known particularly for his brilliant speeches and his iron logic in defending the Palestinian cause.

With only the feeble intellects of Bush, Blair, and Howard to defend us, surely the West is doomed.

Posted by Tim Blair at April 19, 2004 03:53 AM
Comments

brilliant speeches and his iron logic, eh? That must be why he's keeping the name of the new Hamas leader secret -- his iron logic tells him brilliant speeches won't stop incoming missiles.

Posted by: JeffS at April 19, 2004 at 04:35 AM

Murdering Jewish children is considered a "calculating intellectual force?" Talking about blowing up buses is considered "brillent speech and iron logic?"
What accolades did The Age give Hitler?

Posted by: perfectsense at April 19, 2004 at 04:36 AM

There's no qualified women?

Posted by: Ron Hardin at April 19, 2004 at 04:44 AM

Heard a story on ABC radio about the Hamas leader
assassination, looks like ABC house policy is
now to refer to Hamas as a "militant" organisation.
Gotta watch out for thos crazy militants! If they
can keep this up they'll never have to refer to
those romantic resistance fighters as terrrorists
ever again!

Posted by: Stuart Cooper at April 19, 2004 at 04:45 AM

"Allow me to introduce myself... My name is Rantissi... Wile E. Rantissi. I am a genius, whilst you could hardly pass the entrance examination to kindergarten..."

BLAM!

Beep Beep! Whooosh!

http://www.animationconnection.com/wile-e-coyote-genius.htm

Posted by: Dash at April 19, 2004 at 04:49 AM

Even as we speak, Khaled Mashaal is being fitted for a carefully constructed guided missle. It will be fired from a helicopter and will result in the extinguishment of said KM. When they bury him, I hope they put a kosher matzo ball in his mouth.

Posted by: gmroper at April 19, 2004 at 05:19 AM

He's considered a "hard-line militant?" As opposed to the other elements in Hamas urging peaceful coexistence with Israel?

Posted by: Alex Bensky at April 19, 2004 at 05:35 AM

In about 3 weeks, if the current pattern holds, his ironly logical (and brilliant-speech-writing!) intellect will be splattered on his driveway.

Posted by: Aaron at April 19, 2004 at 05:43 AM

Volunteering to head Hamas at this point seems less an exercise of "iron logic" and more like one of "ironic logic"

Posted by: c at April 19, 2004 at 05:44 AM

"Abdullah said European anti-terrorism experts were aiding the Jordanian police investigation, but details were still sketchy -- including a solid identification of the type of explosive the suspects were carrying.

He said that ALTHOUGH THE TRUCKS HAD COME FROM SYRIA, "I'm completely confident that Bashir did not know about it," he said, referring to Syrian President Bashir Assad, whom U.S. officials have accused of allowing terrorist groups to use his country's territory." [emphasis added]

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/2004/04/17/MNGLO66QRH1.DTL

Maybe Boy Assad is the new, anonymous head of Hamas. Why not?

Posted by: Theodopoulos Pherecydes at April 19, 2004 at 05:53 AM

"Brilliant speaches" and "iron logic in defending the palestinian cause"--this is a straight news piece?

Oh well, I guess it's easier to shoot a man on a pedestal.

Posted by: Nathan at April 19, 2004 at 06:29 AM

How will he be identified? Brown trousers.

Cheers
JMH

Posted by: J.M. Heinrichs at April 19, 2004 at 07:24 AM

Y'know, I was wondering where I heard this "brilliant speeches" and "iron logic" drivel before. And then I remembered.

Adolph Hitler. Der Fuehrer. Before WWII, this was the sort of descriptions of him. After the war started, well, we know about that, don't we?

But I have to wonder if these reporters ever read history?

Strike that -- it's a rhetorical question.

Posted by: JeffS at April 19, 2004 at 09:10 AM

Jeff asks:

I have to wonder if these reporters ever read history?
Why, yes - yes they have - enough to learn the phrases used to praise Hitler so they may recycle them when writing about various terrorists.

They're Greens, you see - recycling is very important. :-p

Posted by: Barbara Skolaut at April 19, 2004 at 09:21 AM

Perhaps his knack for brilliant speeches will allow us to get some truly memorable last words from him when the missile is coming in...

Posted by: PW at April 19, 2004 at 09:33 AM

David Bernstein's comment at The Volokh Conspiracy:

"Mark [Kleiman] ... objects that it's bad manners to express glee at the death of the likes of Rantisi. Guess we will have to cancel Purim."

Posted by: Uncle Milk at April 19, 2004 at 10:14 AM

[smack!!] (sound of palm hitting forehead)

Right! Thanks for the reminder, Barbara. I'd forgotten that detail.

Maybe we could extend the privilege, and recyle them as well....?

Posted by: JeffS at April 19, 2004 at 10:36 AM

In unprecedented cooperation with Israel, Hamas has instituted a strict up-and-out promotion policy of late. In a nod to the new ways, Mashaal was heard to say that he would gladly contribute his leadership to Hamas for a few days before yielding to a more qualified candidate. A more living candidate, that is.

The pressures on Mashaal are enormous. He has less than a week to negotiate his stock option benefits with Hamas before his beneficiary cashes in. No one can be certain that even his brilliant rhetoric and iron logic will serve him well in the talks. Accountants can be so Jewish, after all.

Maashal's heir apparent is taking notes. Despite his only average speaking skills and mediocre reasoning ability, he has already decided what beneficiary and funereal packages he wants upon taking the helm at Hamas for a few days. He has even arranged for a bonus dozen over the standard rate of 72 virgins in paradise.

Posted by: from the PalestinianBusinessWeekly at April 19, 2004 at 11:07 AM

Instead of whack-a-mole, now we're playing whack-a-mullah?

Posted by: Noami Kleimpsky at April 19, 2004 at 11:18 AM

Instead of whack-a-mole, now we're playing whack-a-mullah?

Posted by: Noami Kleimpsky at April 19, 2004 at 11:19 AM

Those Hamas guys are so intelligent - their speeches which call for the death of all Jews are really brilliant in the eyes of the ABC !

But those speeches by Western leaders which talk about fighting terrorism - so politically incorrect and stupid !!

Posted by: Jono at April 19, 2004 at 11:20 AM

Has anybody seen the skit on Drew Carey's "Whats my line" where they discuss a topic with everyone adding one word before the next person continues? That could be a viable model for future Hamas leadership.

Posted by: Greg at April 19, 2004 at 11:58 AM

Got up this morning , went to the kitchen to make a coffee and switched on the box to see the reviews of my favourite comedy, Mel of Melbourne’s “the Producers”.
HORROR of HORRORS , C7 Sunrise running a “news report” on the “murder of Rantisi”
A fully dhimified white English journalist probably BBC talking through a white Hajib , cursing the Israelis and declaring her sadness at the fact that America has not joined EUROPE in condemning the murder.... The Palestinians are mourning the death of their beloved leader and all the usual CRAP.
So i turned on my PC and sent C7 a real aggressive email . What else can you do ?
What is Happening to Australian News Broadcasting?
Thank God in today’s Australian editorial made no bones about their support for Bush and Sharon in their fight against the Evils of Islam..

Posted by: davo at April 19, 2004 at 01:07 PM

Khaled Mashaal, who has emerged as the paramount figure in Hamas following the assassination of Abdel-Aziz al-Rantissi by Israel, is a hardline militant who favours a military solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

They're playing a broken record. They said when Yassin was killed that a soft-liner was replaced by the hard-line Rantisi.

Posted by: Andjam at April 19, 2004 at 02:49 PM

No wonder Israel has been able to lift its strike rate. As the Hamas leaders get harder, they get more brittle.

Posted by: Greg at April 19, 2004 at 03:23 PM

At least this prick lived long enough to know what hit him. I bet in his last minutes he had a lot more empathy for Israeli bus passengers!
I was overjoyed at the news. I think this strategy makes perfect sense.
I do not however support the assasination of Arafat. I want him to die an ignoble death of natural causes after Western medicine can do no more to extend his miserable life.

Posted by: Brian. at April 19, 2004 at 04:06 PM

Rantissi couldn't have been that much of a calculating intellect if he didn't see this one coming...the dickhead!

Posted by: Brian. at April 19, 2004 at 04:08 PM

Alex,
Hardline Hamas guys are the ones who want to kill all Israelis more than once

Andjam,
You're right that the media always says that the previous guy was more moderate, but it's true. Dead guys are more yielding.

Posted by: maor at April 19, 2004 at 08:12 PM

I love that phrase: "a military solution." There's something so very revealing about that choice of words.

Posted by: Sage at April 20, 2004 at 12:07 AM

>>I love that phrase: "a military solution." There's something so very revealing about that choice of words.

Yes. Chilling, isn't it?

Posted by: Nathan at April 20, 2004 at 03:23 PM