March 19, 2004

EQUAL TIME

Award-winning Queensland journalist Wayne Sanderson hectored me via email all yesterday with demands that I apologise for the latest Bulletin column. He also challenged me to run the following as a stand-alone item (Wayne refuses to post in comments). Seeing as appeasement is all the rage these days, heeeeeeere’s Wayne:

Your blog host, ex-ABC hack Tim Blair, has limboed down, way down under even his depressingly low standards with his Bulletin comments on the Spanish election.

(Let's pause a moment on that ABC thing - Tim was dropped from Radio National for lack of ability. Now, how bad do you have to be to get flicked out of that sheltered workshop? And hasn't he been howling the ABC house down ever since his lost his spot on that welfare media gravy train.)

But I digress. Back on planet Tim, things have gotten weirder than a month of Margo Kingston columns. According to Tim, the US had a hand in doing down the former Spanish government. Stay with us now, while Tim joins up the dots. First, he attacks the UN resolution condemning ETA for the Madrid bombings, implying that this helped fuel resentment against the Aznar Government. That'd be the resolution passed by the Security Council, the body with the US as a veto-wielding permanent member. So let's see, George Bush helped bring down his Spanish ally with the help of Sammy bin Laden's hit men. Beat that for conspiracy of the decade all you Elder of Zion, Illuminati, Crop Circling, Nexus-reading freakoids!

But Tim knows this is true because Tim knows all. Tim is everywhere. Tim is omniscient. Tim sees inside the minds of the Spanish people - all 40 million of them. Mere mortal pollsters will tell you that most punters do not make up their minds on voting intentions until the last 24 hours of the campaign, but Tim knows they were going to vote for Aznar until the atrocity, and then knows that they changed their minds because they were scared of Sammy's thugs. And he knows this is bad and wrong and cowardly, even though it's democracy at work and democracy is what Tim and his beloved mate George W. are fighting the dastardly towel-heads over. But no, Tim is not hypocritical. It is just that Tim moves in mysterious ways. Tim IS God.

And so Tim smites this grieving nation, even as they bury their dead, but not in any opportunistic liberal lefty type, 'score political points anyway you can get 'em' way, you understand. It might look like that, but only if you forget that Tim IS God and that Supreme Beings do strange stuff.

I worry about Tim, and not just because of this God complex he's developed of late. I worry about Tim should he ever visit Spain. Some folk I know from that bull-fighting, machismo motivated part of the world want to speak with Tim about courage and appeasement. And stuff. You go get 'em Tim. Coupla bolts of lightning, the odd plague of Biblical proportions and lots of rain (on the plain and anywhere else you God damn like) for a good old fashioned Old Testament flood should teach them to live right and fly straight.

This site may have just found its official ombudsman. Should we run a Weekly Wayne?

UPDATE. Under the name Colin Columnist, Sanderson continues grasping for a point at Crikey.com.broke. (Via email, Wayne at first denied he had anything to do with this; later he admitted that, well, yes, he was responsible for the sections about me. The rest of the column, he claims, was written by some other idiot.) And, thanks to Tom in comments, here’s Wayne’s sickening response to September 11.

Posted by Tim Blair at March 19, 2004 02:51 AM
Comments

I suggest a new masthead:

"Tim knows all. Tim is everywhere. Tim is omniscient. Tim sees inside the minds of...people - all...of them." - Battlin' Wayne Sanderson

Make Wayne a feature!

Posted by: Screamapiller at March 19, 2004 at 03:03 AM

Tim, are you everywhere? Are you omniscient? If you are, cool.

Posted by: Donnah at March 19, 2004 at 03:28 AM

how about calling the section 'waynes world' with a nice pic of those 2 idiots from the film of the same name

Posted by: jon shep at March 19, 2004 at 03:33 AM

Tim, if you know all, then you never get speeding tickets, right? That would be sweet.

Speaking of driving, is there a gas station somewhere in the middle of that piece? I dare not try to cross it. Seems like a flurry of cliched insults with little substance written by a guy who apparently gets paid by the word.

Posted by: Matt in Denver at March 19, 2004 at 03:36 AM

One thing I do know: nobody in Spain was going to vote for Aznar. He wasn't a candidate.

Posted by: tim at March 19, 2004 at 03:41 AM

Actually, there is much value in using the word "smite" these days.

For a US example, think how cool it would be to hear a radio announcer say "the Cubs' Sammy Sosa smote that ball over the left field fence".

Posted by: dazed at March 19, 2004 at 03:42 AM

You're God? That explains a lot. Now listen up, Doooooood. I'm through praying, now I'm telling. I want a change in luck and I want it now. Lottery numbers, stock tips, I'm not particular. I want a sure winner, hear?

Oh, and a hummer (the SUV, not the...uh...actually, if you happen to know any particularly talented Aussie babes, I can drive any old car).

Posted by: Ken Summers at March 19, 2004 at 03:47 AM

tim's world! excellent!

Posted by: Mr. Bingley at March 19, 2004 at 03:49 AM

"Wayne refuses to post in comments"

ah, a man of the people, eh?

Posted by: Mr. Bingley at March 19, 2004 at 03:50 AM

Tim is in everybody out there.
Everybody's got Tim in them!
Everybody except one person that is...
Yeah, one person!
The evil opposite of Tim.
The Anti-Tim

Anti-Tim got no Tim in 'em,
lemme tell ya.

Wayne Sanderson has no Tim in him.

And Tim is in Joan Rivers
but he's trying to get out, man!
He's trying to get out!
Listen up Joanie Baby!

Tim is everywhere
Tim is everything
Tim is everybody
Tim is still the king

Posted by: Mojo Nixon at March 19, 2004 at 03:56 AM

That was awfully windy and overwrought for just an adhominem attack. Here's the Reader's Digest version:

Tim's a talentless hack
Tim's crazier than Margo (ouch)
Tim thinks he's omniscient
Tim's a conspiracy freak
Tim has a God-complex
Tim is mean to grieving Spaniards
Tim would get his ass kicked in Spain
Tim would bring down a flood on Spain (that's one personal attack I bet Tim's never heard before)

Did I miss any?

I could almost see the flecks of spittle forming at the corners of Wayne's mouth as he typed that.

Posted by: Randal Robinson at March 19, 2004 at 03:57 AM

dastardly towel-heads

Ever notice how quickly the left resorts to racial slurs?

Posted by: Robert Crawford at March 19, 2004 at 04:08 AM

What's Spanish for "don't get your panties in a bunch?" That's about the only reasonable comment on this post. I don't suppose he will return the favor and let you post on his blog. Nah. He's a lefty weenie (is that redundant?). Maybe you should threaten to retaliate by writing mean things about bullfighters and their associates wearing spangled tights and even meaner things about the crap they call beer and wine in Spain.

Posted by: JorgXMcKie at March 19, 2004 at 04:34 AM

Actually, Tim is a hackless talent, and Wayne's a wee bit jealous in a sputtering grade-school way

Posted by: charlotte at March 19, 2004 at 04:40 AM

Wayne's World! Wayne's World! Party time! EXCELLENT!

Honestly, this fruit loop is so funny you SHOULD make him a regular feature. Comic relief, dig?

Posted by: Dave P. at March 19, 2004 at 04:43 AM

I was going to say let him post in the comments if he wants to be heard, but I don't think we need any more long-winded semi-coherent trolls around here.

And he knows this is bad and wrong and cowardly, even though it's democracy at work...

I have heard similar comments from a number of people, and I'm mystified. So if you disagree with the results of an election, you disagree with the concept of democracy? Why is it no one ever thinks of this while they're deploring Bush's presidency?

Posted by: Angie Schultz at March 19, 2004 at 04:43 AM

I'd suggest a anti-Tim Haiku.

Posted by: Ron Hardin at March 19, 2004 at 05:03 AM

Some folk I know from that bull-fighting, machismo motivated part of the world want to speak with Tim about courage and appeasement. And stuff.

Macho, macho man! I wanna be a Macho man! But since I'm a bit too old and a bit too unwilling to get out of this armchair, I'll threaten Tim with vague, unnamed "folk." Because I have connections all over the world. Fear the wrath of the mighty Wayne!

Posted by: Sonetka at March 19, 2004 at 05:18 AM

Hey, Jorg, lay off the (inexpensive) Spanish wine -- it's quite good and getting better. Can't speak for their beer one way or the other.

Posted by: IceCold at March 19, 2004 at 05:22 AM

After reading Wayne's reaction to Tim's column on the recent Spanish election- that Tim "smites this grieving nation" and must believe he "IS God" and that "Supreme Beings do strange stuff"- I couldn't wait to read the almighty smack-down and curses for all eternity that Tim must have inveighed against Espana.

But, gee, did you link to the wrong column? All I read was smart, reasonable opinion written by a reasonable mortal. (Or is "reasonable mortal" more of an epithet than the overblown motorcycle columnist just threw at you?)

In his sputterings about machismo, though, maybe Wayne happened upon a new rationalization for capitulation - that appeasement is macho, for it takes real men to admit when they're scared... Just a thought

Posted by: charlotte at March 19, 2004 at 05:45 AM

Wow, and I thought our lefties had problems with logic.

Let me try this

3-10: PP was comfortably ahead in the polls. the only doubt was how big they would win.

3-11: you know what happened.

3-11 to 3-14: a massive disinformation campaign to put the blame on the PP, with rival PSOE and their friendly media disseminating false rumours (suicide bomber, intel services were angry at the gov't because they said they thought 99% probability it was Islamists since the very beginning, etc) and then shouting 'coverup, coverup'. Street agitation, accusation "the govt lies if they don't arrest the bad guys in 24 hours" (really, they did say that), and contravening the electoral law forbidding political propaganda the day before the election. Opposition leaders asking for the resignation of the government, because 'it lied',... THE NIGHT BEFORE THE ELECTION and saying the results wouldn't be legitimate if Aznar didn't appear in a special session in Parliament ON THE NIGHT BEFORE THE ELECTION. 'Spontaneous'rallies in front of PP's offices across Spain shouting and insulting, pot-banging. 1 office burned down. Physical assaults all over. PSOE-friendly media: "what do you know, there are demos EXACTLY in that place at that time; encouraging them? moi?" PSOE officials saying 'we know things that the government isn't telling' without offering any evidence.

3-14: PSOE wins

Quite clear, isn't it? Yes, some minor mistakes in being a bit too blunt blaming ETA were made the first 3 hours by the interior minister, and were quickly corrected. In fact, critics knew about the Islamic connection only after the minister held a press conference about it. It was then whan the opposition, who had been saying 'yes, it's ETA but let's not use this atrocity to blame anyone politically, just the murderers', started precisely to use the atrocity and blame it directly on the government rather than on the murderers when they Islamic clue appeared, as they saw they could inflame the public opinion.

Guys, this country looked a bit like Venezuela that night.

For the record: I am not questioning the democratic result itself: people voted, and the ballot count was unimpeachable. But it there was manipulation and lies, well, they were done by the opposition.

BTW earlier today, all relevant intel docs have been declassified and show that, indeed, for the first hours they thought it was ETA until they later knew about the Islamic clue. This is exactly what the government had been telling all along.

Tim, I haven't seen there's detailed information available in english on the web about the declassified documents yet, but I'll post about it as soon as it is available, OK?

Posted by: Franco Alemán (from Barcelona, Spain, New member of the Axis of Weasels) at March 19, 2004 at 05:54 AM

Lord Tim! MY LIFE FOR YOU!!

Posted by: mojo at March 19, 2004 at 06:00 AM

Tim, if it makes you feel better....I've heard of you. I've never heard of a Wayne Sanderson, whatever that is.

Posted by: Wallace at March 19, 2004 at 06:04 AM

Oh, and BTW:

I am also from that bull-fighting, machismo motivated part of the world and, if I speak to Tim is to thank him for his support and generosity, contacting me in the immediate aftermath and inviting me and Golan to guestblog about the atrocity, no questions asked, even though we have never met in person before. That is courage.

But Tim knows this is true because Tim knows all. Tim is everywhere. Tim is omniscient. Tim sees inside the minds of the Spanish people

No, Tim has Spanish friends. Tim gets information. Tim asks questions. And has a brain to process all these elements.

Posted by: Franco Alemán (from Barcelona, Spain, New member of the Axis of Weasels) at March 19, 2004 at 06:04 AM

It's allright, it's allright, allright. Tim moves in mysterious ways! Yeah!

(Hmmm...ponders making animated gif of Tim moving in a mysterious way...)

Posted by: dorkafork at March 19, 2004 at 06:11 AM

Sometimes I hope for well-reasoned discussions, but with responses like Wayne's full of personal attacks it makes discussions between "rightists" and "leftists" rather difficult if not impossible.

Wayne, instead of attempting to tear Tim apart by making all these accusations about him and saying his arguments are stupid, why don't you instead counter his argument? Provide your own alternatives to his "conspiracy theories" and perhaps you'll give people here something better to do than mock you.

Posted by: notfearing at March 19, 2004 at 06:18 AM

"Should we run a Weekly Wayne?"

Only if you're running him out of the building.

Make him start his own dern blog if he wants to get all snarked up.

Posted by: chap at March 19, 2004 at 06:20 AM

Tim, it's not fair to just post the part where someone just makes lame, somewhat overwritten insults and remove the actual substance of their complaint.

Posted by: Mike G at March 19, 2004 at 06:25 AM

This by the way is utter nonsense:

Mere mortal pollsters will tell you that most punters do not make up their minds on voting intentions until the last 24 hours of the campaign

I think most pollsters would tell you that you could safely bet on the votes of a good 70+% of the population, and that it's a relatively small swing group (in America we call them Reagan Democrats, except when they're Clinton Republicans) who push the balance one way or the other.

Posted by: Mike G at March 19, 2004 at 06:27 AM

The Brisbane Institute is right near my office. Thus, unless I have some objections, I'll run in and punch this Wayne guy on my way to work. Success!

Posted by: Marty at March 19, 2004 at 06:31 AM

I see many posts saying the Spain vote was a great display of democracy and the people speaking. Do you in the "eu" truly feel that an attack against commuters that kills 201 and maims 1000s and changes the outcome of an election 3 days after is really a "display of democracy"
Why so easily frame these attacks in madrid or baghdad in your little minds as attacks against the US or Bush "collaborators"? These are attacks against people who want to live like you, almost.
You cast the Spain vote as a democratic vote? With that in mind you believe that it then was, and is, democratic for a islamo-fascist group of cowards to influence a "democratic" election with death?
Both ETA AND the islamo-fascist cowards are behind these attacks. This are people who have come to live among you, people who have come to your land to accept your generosity and welfare dollars and lack of oppression that they faced from their "brethren" in their homeland. They are living among you like dirty flies at a picnic, simply waiting to apply their brand of Islamo-fascisim to your society. You fools on the left in Spain coddle and embrace these murdering coward monkeys as if they were part "of your struggle against modernity".
Si, Do blame the spaniards, there is no other focus to take. 1 week prior to the elections Aznar was slated to win, 1 week before elections 1/2 ton of explosives were found in a van with ETA members on the way into madrid city. They were stopped. Bombs explode on the trains and of course ETA is suspect immediately. Can you imagine in this "politically correct" environment that the Spanish govt comes right out and says "it was muslims, or it was al queda"? the left would cry foul racism before that news blurb even ended.
I can tell you I feel the "eu" is quite quickly turning itself into a modern shithole along the very same lines that destroyed her beginning in the 1930's. the patterns are entirely similar.
There is a sense of real world reality in the "eu" that is viewed through a very tainted and un-focused lense.
It is indeed a shame that spain's vote shows to the world that your hatred of the US and bush is greater than any love you had for the dead.
They disgrace the memory of those murdered by permitting a group of bearded cowards who came to the country to seek welfare monies and freedom to effect the outcome of the election.
Look at Kosovo for a moment- yesterday 22 people were killed, MORE THAN HAD BEEN KILLED IN one DAY in BAHGDAD the same day. The first responses were for the US and the UK to begin to send additional troops in.
What is the NEED to have US troops there on EU soil ? What is the reason behind the "eu" need to have US troops on her soil? Greece hires a US security firm to oversea the Olympics, and calls for a US fleet to remain offshore. Why cannot the nations of the "eu" get anything done without US help? What has either the "eu" or the disgraced UN (wait for oil scam to be published manana) done within Kosovo that has been successful?
This is hypocrisy that baffles the average american.
There will not be one more drop of US blood lost for anyone in the EU. It would be a wonderful thing to see every damn one of our troops to immediately leave the fetid and tainted "eu" soil. You do not even deserve even the wind of our collective flatulence let alone the lives of our young men and woman. You are pathetic pieces of human misery who are helpless with even your own simple struggles.
We in the US have shed too much blood for you damn fools over the last century.
Keep this in mind "eu" nutcases- The 9-11 cowards lived, planned, and carried out the attacks from the cozy base in europe. What is it about life in europe that makes those who come seeking your generosity and welfare spend a few years among you and then want to go out and kill all things western? Have you welcomed and charmed these newcomers to your society so much that they then lose their minds? Do you explain the sordid conditions of your cities and economies as being the fault of the jews and the US? Is it THAT which then turns them into virgin seekers so readily?
I really have to laugh at you pathetic assholes- the US re-built Germany and Japan, among others, and created the constitutions and democracies that exist there today. Don't offer you child-like explanation that you have taken care of that "thank you for assisting us" BS already. It's been just 50 short years and just look at you jackasses.
We go into Iraq to topple the savage saddam and you then demonize our president, you demonize the people of the US as American fools, you say we are bullys for attempting the same thing for the iraqis as we did for those who suffered under the GERMANY bred cowardness and their leader hitler's cowardness.
Think about that for just one second you flea brained fucks. All the US is doing in iraq is simply the same attempt at fixing YOUR country which YOU fucking broke. I won't forget the other dozens of countries you butchered and broke and the US fixed. Don't apply your "eu" brand of selective memory to reality either.
So in short it is best to simply offer a majority of the tainted minds in the EU a hearty FUCK YOU. Your on your own for the duration of your pitiful existence. Without the phony restraints placed upon us by the disgraced un and the embattle/hasn't even got off the ground "eu" we in the US can now take our gloves off and beat the virgin seeking cowards into the ground. Perhaps the US may leave a few troops in europe to prevent the re-introduction of the ottoman empire, but I hope not as the US (who make up a far greater proportion of people from around the world who live, work and govern among us as Americans, and a far greater intellectual diversity) would like to see how the new "eu" performs and succeeds... with ANYTHING.
Prove to somebody, anywhere on this planet, that you have the capacity to succeed in one damn venture of yours. France's navy (I use the same ships in my bath tub) trains alongside the great chinese dictatorship yesterday- a democratic "eu" country threatening a democratic Tawain vote of independence along side the butchers of Tiannemin.
The next step is for germany to sell the the nuke reactor that german PEOPLE do not want to China, and the france will re-arm china. France and germany- who the will clean up that mess? you desperate fools.
The bright minds left europe over the last 3 centuries. leaving nothing but a bunch of nanny state welfare laden minds who can not see any brightness to the world even on a sunny day.
So in short it is best to simply offer a majority of the tainted minds in the EU a hearty FUCK YOU.

Posted by: Pato at March 19, 2004 at 06:35 AM

It looks like Wayne is a complete front-bottom, with no guts and a bit of a self-esteem problem. If he had actually done his homework and found out how nasty and political the Spanish socialists and their media fellow travellers had played on the datardly attacks in Madrid, he would hang his head in shame.

Now the poor old Spaniards will probably see their country go to hell in a handcart, as countries tend to do when ruled by socialists and appeasers.

If poor old Wayne knew anyhting about history he might see the paralles with France betweeen the wars. Appeasement never works Wayne. How many times do you have to be told that. Spain has now become a definite target for more attacks, because the terrorists know that the Spanish government won't do anything to stop them.

When are the idotarians like Wayne going to realise that you can't give these stupid Isalmic terrorists what they want? They won't stop committing terrorist acts, Wayne until every one of them is dead, and we have to kill them. War is a necessary thing, when you face facists, Wayne.

Posted by: Toryhere at March 19, 2004 at 06:42 AM

It looks like Wayne is a complete front-bottom, with no guts and a bit of a self-esteem problem. If he had actually done his homework and found out how nasty and political the Spanish socialists and their media fellow-travellers had played on the datardly attacks in Madrid, he would hang his head in shame. But that's the point, Lefties have no shame. They play politics at every turn, but only really to gain power. Once they get it they enjoy it and abuse it, but they rarely use it for any good purpose. With people like the Spanish socialists, the Democrats in the US and the ALP its reallly a case of politics for politics' sake.

Now the poor old Spaniards will probably see their country go to hell in a handcart, as countries tend to do when ruled by socialists and appeasers.

If poor old Wayne knew anyhting about history he might see the parallels between Spain now and France in the 30s, when the appeasement favoured by Socialist governments who used dubiuos political tactics to get elected led to foreign policy sterility and defeat in 1940. Appeasement never works Wayne. How many times do you have to be told that. Spain has now become a definite target for more attacks, because the terrorists know that the Spanish government won't do anything to stop them.

When are the idiotarians like Wayne going to realise that you can't give these stupid Isalmic terrorists what they want? They won't stop committing terrorist acts, Wayne, until every one of them is dead. And we have to kill them. War is a necessary thing, when you face facists, Wayne.

Posted by: Toryhere at March 19, 2004 at 06:50 AM

Pato

Could you repost the readers digest condenced version? I have a short attention span.

Posted by: Papertiger at March 19, 2004 at 06:52 AM

Tim can move in mysterious ways all he wants, just so long as he flushes afterwards.

Posted by: R C Dean at March 19, 2004 at 07:04 AM

Wayne who?? A third rate writer for a fish-wrap "paper". A paper that is veeeerrrry selective when it comes to publishing Letters to the Editor.

Posted by: Kate at March 19, 2004 at 07:19 AM

Ha ha ha! I like the bit when the bearded fat man got angry!

Posted by: Amos at March 19, 2004 at 07:19 AM

The other side of the PP loss is the election of socialists. It is a failed ideology. How can Spain be strong with socialists in power and a shrinking population? Eventually it will have not enough citizens to take from (tax) and too many to give to (transfer payment recipients); and all the while the government taking its 30-50% to manage the transactions. It will be too weak to defend itself and act autonomously in its citizens best interests. Besides socialists wear Birkenstocks and listen to old Peter, Paul and Mary records. They should be soundly thrashed with Wayne Sanderson’s moldy underpants.

I feel for Spain. They must be in a terrible state of grief and mourning. However, when sufficient time has passed, and the emotional fog that attends these catastrophes clears, there will be substantial voter remorse over the choice they've made.

The Abu Hafs al-Masri Brigades have decided to gloat "Because of this [electoral] decision, the leadership has decided to stop all operations within the Spanish territories... until we know the intentions of the new government that has promised to withdraw Spanish troops from Iraq. And we repeat this to all the brigades present in European lands: stop all operations....Praise be to God who gave us this victory in the conquest of Madrid... where one of the pillars of the axis of Crusader evil was destroyed"

When the next attack occurs, wherever it may be, the proud people of Spain will have some soul searching to do. Poking oneself in the eye with a sharp stick is seldom the cure for electorate anger, even for socialists.

By the way, “Wayne Sanderson” means “scrotum rash” in Elbonian, or it would if there were such a thing. That would be cool. Heh

Posted by: Hudson at March 19, 2004 at 07:34 AM

I don't think Tim Blair is everywhere. Because even if he could be, he'd choose to spend all his time at the pub and the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders dressing room.

Posted by: Ernst Blofeld at March 19, 2004 at 08:43 AM

Wayne's World?

It sounded like Whine's World. I think someone should tell Whine that we're all born with a certain number of words in us and when we talk (or type) them out we die.

Someone should also give the same message to Pato and remind him it's time for his tablet.

Posted by: Fool to Himself & Burden to Others at March 19, 2004 at 08:57 AM

Wow - Wayne really HAS drunk the kool-aid!

Posted by: Joe at March 19, 2004 at 09:08 AM

Whoa! Wayne, son. Jealous much?

Posted by: Rebecca at March 19, 2004 at 09:13 AM

Looks like Wayne's still giving the Bundaberg OP rum a pounding. Not much clarity in that drink.

Posted by: slatts at March 19, 2004 at 09:15 AM

Wayne Sanderson "has been a finalist in both the print and television categories of the United Nations Peace Prize Awards."

Is there anything more damning that you could put in your resume than that.

Posted by: Harry Tuttle at March 19, 2004 at 09:19 AM

I can't believe nobody has asked Tim yet if he could make a burrito so hot that even He could not eat it.

Posted by: A satisfied customer at March 19, 2004 at 09:39 AM

I really didn't get his point about the U.S. having "a hand in doing down the former Spanish government," especially after reading the column in question. I think we all know who the *real* conspiracy theorist is...[ahem, looking in Wayne's direction]

Posted by: Sean M. at March 19, 2004 at 10:23 AM

"Tim was dropped from Radio National for lack of ability."

How the hell does he know this? Based on the output of long-term employees, ability has never been a prerequisite.

In my book, 'expulsion' from the ABC for ANY reason should be worn like a badge of honour (even being punished for plagiarism would expose the institution's hypocrisy - yeah Adams, I'm talking about you).

Respect, Tim.

Posted by: fidens at March 19, 2004 at 10:35 AM

I've got a new name for short-sighted appeasers of this sort: "Dhimmwits".

Relatedly, I see that quite a few bloggers are quoting Kipling's poem about paying Danegeld:

It is always a temptation to an armed and agile nation,
To call upon a neighbour and to say:—
“We invaded you last night—we are quite prepared to fight,
Unless you pay us cash to go away.”
[...]

And that is called paying the Dane-geld;
But we’ve proved it again and again,
That if once you have paid him the Dane-geld
You never get rid of the Dane.

For those of you educated in Victoria during the Cain/ Kirner years: "Danes" were a people in northern Europe, the ancestors of today's funky techno-pop-loving backpackers, who many, years ago, used to murder, rape, pillage and commit other inappropriate acts invading the person space of, villages in England and elsewhere.

Posted by: Uncle Milk at March 19, 2004 at 10:39 AM

"According to Tim, the US had a hand in doing down the former Spanish government. Stay with us now..."

Er, is this meant to be satire, or is this yet another "award-winning journalist" who would fail a high-school comprehension test?

Perhaps this sentence from Sanderson's resume explains his attitude: "...has been a finalist in both the print and television categories of the United Nations Peace Prize Awards". Further googling reveals he was Sandy McCutcheon's producer at RN (hence the "not-good-enough" jibe), and is quite involved with Illegal immigration and environmental activism.

Oh dear.

It's wilted-lettuce (to quote one of Wayne's heroes) criticism from people like this that should make Tim feel good about himself. If this tool can't be bothered commenting along with the other idiots like Myxy, Nemmy, Niall, and Miranda then let him get his own blog. Like Matthew Sweet says, "Write your own song".

Posted by: Craig Mc at March 19, 2004 at 10:41 AM

jealousy's a curse!

Posted by: Floral Camper at March 19, 2004 at 11:01 AM

's right. An entirely better class of idiots, we are.

Mind you, in this joint, the odd idiot raises the average IQ count considerably.

Don't blame the terrorists, blame the Spanish! Fantastic! Who's blaming the victims now, pray?

(Cue howls of anguish, sprays of spittle, etc)

Posted by: Nemesis at March 19, 2004 at 11:13 AM

I think a Weekly Wayne is an excellent idea. After all, there are so few idiots around to mock these days -

WHAP!

Oh, thanks. I'm better now. Still, why not have an Official Site Idiot?

Posted by: Pixy Misa at March 19, 2004 at 11:16 AM

Tim

I would be happy to accompany you to Spain to explain to them why those who voted in the new government are appeasers of terrorists.

CV - Male,185cm, 99 Kg, in pretty good shape for 36 years, 10 Years in Australian Army as an Officer, itching to smack some lefties in the mouth but my current business/income/family here in Perth would probably suffer so I don't. I have a few mates currently free lancing in Iraq delivering cash and acting as bullet catchers for the Provisional Authority who would be keen to catch up for a few beers or rums in Spain.

Paratus and Percute Percute Velociter

(Perhaps Drago would be available)

Posted by: Razor at March 19, 2004 at 11:22 AM

"things have gotten weirder than a month of Margo Kingston columns"

Best. Metaphor. Ever.

Posted by: Brian at March 19, 2004 at 11:28 AM

Pronounced 'Whine'.

Posted by: Paul Johnson at March 19, 2004 at 11:30 AM

Did the bloghead forget to mention that it was the Aznar government that demanded the UN security council include the reference to ETA in their resolution condemning the bombing?

Did he mention that Aznar's foreign secretary cabled every Spanish embassy telling them to do everything they could to blame ETA in the media?

Still, you bunch of dimwits could've read both these facts in the New York Times if you could be bothered.

Posted by: Miranda Divide at March 19, 2004 at 11:51 AM

Seems like he got you fair and square, Tim.

However, he could've said the same in three sentences, and flattened you. By making it more ad-hominem, than point of fact, he has lost the upper ground.

You could learn from that.

Posted by: Referee at March 19, 2004 at 12:03 PM

Yeah, Wayne's World would make a great weekly feature. Only, ask him not to spit next time, OK?

Posted by: Emjay at March 19, 2004 at 12:14 PM

Wayne and Miranda, sitting in a tree,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G each others' posteriors.

Posted by: Andrea Harris at March 19, 2004 at 12:18 PM

Sorry referee, you have to be content with watching.

Posted by: Andrea Harris at March 19, 2004 at 12:19 PM

Wayne Kerr?

Posted by: Tony.T at March 19, 2004 at 12:56 PM

I am with Ken in regard of change of luck. But in my case I don't care for lottery, I want stock tips and I want them now.

Oh, and Almighty Tim? If you get tired of smiting, you could delegate some of it to me to me. I sometimes post as Lady Executioner.

Posted by: Katherine at March 19, 2004 at 01:29 PM

Re: Weekly Wayne
Fuck NO!
Already too many electricicles being drained from the space/time continuim to devote any to the ravings of some lunatic unbeliever that Tim truly does know all/tell all.
Mike

Posted by: Mike Daley at March 19, 2004 at 02:03 PM

Hey Lady E, fancy meeting you here!

Posted by: Ken Summers at March 19, 2004 at 04:49 PM

Tim is God?? OK guys, you all know what this means... I want to see each and every one of you down on your goddamn knees **pronto**. Yes, *all* of you. Hey, you over there Miranda, I'm talking to you. On your knees ... Good. Now, BOW IN THE DIRECTION OF SYDNEY. You all did that? Fine. Repeat this process five times a day until we no longer have the need to blog.

Posted by: Pacman at March 19, 2004 at 05:21 PM

Woah. That's some seriously bad writing. My brain hurts. It's too early in the morning for that sort of thing...

Posted by: Andrea Harris at March 19, 2004 at 08:40 PM

In case you're interested, Brisbane Line is the "current affairs" show on Sundays on "community" (the communi part is correct, they just mis-spelt the last two letters) radio 4ZZZ in Brisbane; it makes the ABC sound like Rush Limbaugh.
All very reasoned stuff- the Rand corp is secretly mining the Great Barrier Reef to crush the coral so they can extract exotic poisons that they feed to 'Gitmo prisoners, that sort of thing. They regard Pilger as a moderate.

Posted by: Habib at March 19, 2004 at 11:15 PM

Did you know that an anagram of "Wayne Sanderson" is "Non-news, daresay"? Also "A wanness yonder" and "Yawn, ass drone en."

Posted by: Angus Jung at March 19, 2004 at 11:22 PM

"- now theres some seriously weird writing...."

You're not joking - articles this bad should be sealed in lead drums and buried in New Mexico salt mines.

If 4ZZZ is anything like 3RRR, then it's a treasured jewel despite its idiotic politics. It's a fabulous wellspring for music and local culture. One thing Tim would like about these stations - they're subscriber funded!

Posted by: Craig Mc at March 19, 2004 at 11:55 PM

Tom, obviously that article by Sanderson was intended as humor.

"coming as it does from the most God-bothering of nations, the country that holds it self up as the truest follower of the Good Lord Jesus 'turn the other cheek' Christ"

That Wayne, what a card. Everybody knows we're run by the Jews.

Posted by: Ken Summers at March 20, 2004 at 12:47 AM

I actually listen to ZZZ, because it is user pays (and plays a lot of old Ramones, reggae and weird shit) and in reality the politics don't send me into anywhere near as large a paroxym of rage as the ABC does, because I'm not paying for it.

Posted by: Habib at March 20, 2004 at 12:53 AM

Don't blame the terrorists, blame the Spanish! Fantastic! Who's blaming the victims now, pray?

Please explain how Tim is "blaming" the Spanish for anything. Obviously, the Spanish did not bring this disaster on themselves; the terrorists are completely responsible. Has Tim suggested otherwise? However, what many, including Tim, have suggested is that the Spanish reaction to this disaster is wrong-headed and, yes, appeasement.

Keep trying, Nemesis. If nothing else, your always good for a chuckle.

Posted by: Tongue Boy at March 20, 2004 at 01:50 AM

I've worked at ZZZ, and can't tell you it's not strictly subscriber-funded. It's supported by the Communist Party. For instance when they were kicked off the UQ campus for not paying their rent, the Commies found them new digs. They'd probably be gone, if not for the Communist Party.

It's so left of centre, that's widely accepted as noble, not a conflict of integrity.

I kid you not.

Course, Joh could've got rid of them easily too, but despite their protestations, we have amazing freedom of speech in QLD.

Many ZZZers have gone on to bigger and better things. The ABC is full of us. Being a lesbian helped in both instances.

Posted by: referee at March 20, 2004 at 09:19 AM

"It's supported by the Communist Party. For instance when they were kicked off the UQ campus for not paying their rent, the Commies found them new digs."

I'm surprised the Communist Party could provide accomodation to anything other than fleas.

Posted by: Craig Mc at March 20, 2004 at 01:11 PM

Meanwhile from Wayne himself:

Re your post on Tim Blair's comment site - I am not now and never have been involved with illegal immigration nor environmental activisim. You should be aware when you do google searches that there is more than one Wayne Sanderson on the planet and the search itself will not distinguish between us. Simple mistake, anyone could have made it.

If you would be so kind as to correct your false assertion, I'd be grateful.

cheers,
Wayne Sanderson.

...and ny reply:

So (you) weren't the chair for the Centre for Social Justice, Uniting Church in Feb 2002?

And you weren't the ACF's Media Officer in 1998/1999?

If not, then I'll post your email and my groveling apology as near my offending post as I can manage. Let me know your answers ASAP.

...Wayne again:

Certainly not. Though it's none of your business, I'm an atheist, confirmed, long term. I'm a journalist and writer, not now and never have been "involved in illegal imigration ...." OK? Your got it wrong. I have assured you of that once already. Politely. Now you come back to question my word, perhaps unaware of in the insult implicit in so doing.

As I said it was a simple mistake, easy to make. Is it so hard to acknowledge that correct your error? Please, once again I ask you politely to do that.

best regards,
Wayne Sanderson.

...Now, my apology:

I apologise to Wayne for stating that he was involved in illegal immigration (aka refugee) activism, and/or environmental activism. Wayne says that he has never been involved with activism in these areas, was never Media Officer for the ACF, nor the Chair of the Centre for Social Justice, and I accept his answers at face value. I say these things while imagining myself prostrate at his feet, which I am not fit to blog upon.

Done.

Don't consider it "insulting" to have someone drill down below a surface reply. Questioning things presented at face value is Journalism 101, isn't it? BTW, I wasn't accusing you of being involved in illegal immigration, but illegal immigration activism. There's a difference, and I certainly wasn't implying any criminal behaviour.

In any case, my apologies for mistaking you for the other, not the same, completely different and, I'm sure, far less attractive ACF and/or CSJ Wayne Sanderson, whoever he is.

cya
Craig

Posted by: Craig Mc at March 20, 2004 at 01:44 PM