August 28, 2003

'LIVING ON PECKINGS'!

Emily Jones appreciates Arthur Millerís fear of celebrity oppression:

Does anybody else recall their own trepidation following the "disappearance" of Maureen Dowd? What about when Noam Chomsky's limp body was discovered in a roadside brush, a single bullet to his temple? The country coiled in shock when it was announced that traces of arsenic were discovered in the empty box of Krispy-Kremes that ultimately killed Michael Moore. As this is written, a Dixie Chick sits in a dark cell, living on peckings, uncertain of her fate, while Janeane Garofalo hasn't been given the opportunity to co-star in a shit film since literally the start of the so-called "war on terror". When will the nightmare end?

Itíll end when the the likes of Miller are finally allowed to speak their mind to the global press. Oh, wait ...

Posted by Tim Blair at August 28, 2003 04:34 AM
Comments

I always thought Jeneane was hot, then she opened her big mouth off camera. Stupidity is such a turn off.

Posted by: Amos at August 28, 2003 at 04:36 AM

Check out another of the stories on the BBC's article sidebar "Miller Backs Peace Power", it's great!

It's right over "Miller Fears for Civil Rights", "Miller Condemns Terrorism" and "No one gives a Fuck What Miller Thinks".

Posted by: Amos at August 28, 2003 at 04:46 AM

It only took one box of Krispy Kremes to kill Michael Moore? What did they do with the other four?

Posted by: sean at August 28, 2003 at 04:53 AM

One more! This is what precient genius Miller wrote just after sep11:

But he added that he had his doubts about the ability of US President Bush in such testing circumstances.

"He is not a very good actor, he's too obvious most of the time, he has no confidence in his own facade, so he's constantly over-emphasising his sincerity," said Miller.

"He doesn't make for good acting, he doesn't make us easy, he doesn't make us feel comfortable the way a good actor does."

Hey newsflash, Miller, he's not acting! He really is the fucking president! Aww, and you thought it was Martin Sheen.

What a goddamn idiot.

Posted by: Amos at August 28, 2003 at 04:57 AM

Hey Amos, have you seen Garofalo? Short, chunky, terrible complexion, thick glasses... I guess she IS hot!

Posted by: Rob at August 28, 2003 at 04:57 AM

i think she miss-typed there, sean. i believe it took an entire store.

Posted by: Mr. Bingley at August 28, 2003 at 04:58 AM

I knew everyone would dump on me for liking Garofalo, but she was hot in the Larry Sanders show goddamnit leave me alone

Posted by: Amos at August 28, 2003 at 05:01 AM

Okay, we'll ignore your opinion of Garofalo and award you bonus points for liking Larry Sanders.

Posted by: Rob at August 28, 2003 at 05:03 AM

Arthur Miller was married to Marilyn Monroe. Monroe died under suspicious circumstances. What deep secret is Miller hiding?

Posted by: wallace at August 28, 2003 at 05:38 AM

Now I feel vindicated for hating Death of a Salesman in high school and also for thinking A. Miller was an assbag in the biographical film we had to watch of him.

Why the HELL didn't Biff (or Happy, can't remember) just to to U of V, for god's sake??? What was stopping him? This wasn't the choice of Hamlet we're talking here. Made no sense. Stupid play.

Posted by: yario at August 28, 2003 at 05:53 AM

Just as an aside on the Great Doughnut Debate I seem to have provoked, I once read in a Salon article that Moore, self-anointed working man's hero, was so despised by the crew and staff of one of his television shows that whenever he would launch into a hissy fit, one of them would bring him a box of doughnuts, not to placate him, but rather in the hopes that his gluttonous nature would compel him to eat so many of them that he might die.

Thanks for the link, Tim.

Posted by: Emily at August 28, 2003 at 06:04 AM

Miller, from the article: "It was a tawdry time, it was a rotten time to be alive..."

Yeah, living in America in the 50s must have been horrible. Nothing like the giant party that the 30s and 40s were.

Posted by: Sean E at August 28, 2003 at 06:48 AM

"Yeah, living in America in the 50s must have been horrible. Nothing like the giant party that the 30s and 40s were."

Or the 60's or 70's for that matter.

Posted by: Ryan at August 28, 2003 at 07:43 AM

Where have you gone Joe Dimaggio?

Posted by: aaron at August 28, 2003 at 09:13 AM

Wallace wrote "Arthur Miller was married to Marilyn Monroe. Monroe died under suspicious circumstances"
Yes and also Maralyn Monroe had an affair with JFK, and Miller has never explained where he was when Kennedy was assassinated.

Posted by: ross at August 28, 2003 at 09:25 AM

Neither has Joe DiMaggio, for that matter.

My money's on Joltin' Joe as the "Keyser Sose" of his day. An Italian from Brooklyn? Hell yeah!

Them Boston fancypants never had a clue.

Posted by: mojo at August 28, 2003 at 10:25 AM

These celebrities never seem to see the slightest hint of irony in the fact that they are complaining about the chill on their free speech to CNN, Barbara Walters, the NY Times, or the National Press Club. If celebrity dissent gets crushed much further their words will be beamed out to alien civilizations in deep space.

Posted by: Randal Robinson at August 28, 2003 at 11:09 AM

"An Italian from Brooklyn?"

Mojo: Joltin' Joe was born and raised in California.

Posted by: CGeib at August 28, 2003 at 12:20 PM

Miller says the 50s was a rotten time to be alive. Fergawdsake, he was bedding Marilyn Monroe then! Obviously, wanking is his go.

Posted by: slatts at August 28, 2003 at 01:05 PM

I think you misunderstand. Miller is saying that the '50s were a terrible time to be alive _if you lived in the U.S._ Obviously, if you lived in the USSR or Eastern Europe or China it was a GREAT time to be alive. Remember the movies and TV about all those happy, happy proletariats?

It was just the rotten, depressing U.S. that was a crappy place to live. Look at the misery reflected on TV of the time: I Love Lucy, Gunsmoke, Leave it to Beaver, Mr. Ed., The Ed Sullivan Show, the Sid Caesar Show, the Jack Benny Show, Red Skelton (a suspicious name, indeed. was he investigated by McCarthy?) etc. Those poor, tragic Americans.

Don't you at least remember the giant wall that was built to keep them from fleeing to Mexico? Oh, the humanity!

Posted by: JorgXMcKie at August 28, 2003 at 01:48 PM

All this revisionism! Miller now says the '50s were horrible. Well, he didn't say so at the time, even though plenty of other people spoke out. I lived through the '50s and they were not frightening. Boring, maybe. Miller wasn't especially high-profile; he only became so after his marriage to Marilyn (proving that even eggheads occasionally think with their dicks), a status he obviously enjoyed, until she became too much of as junkie, when he quickly dropped her.

Only the BBC could take his senile ramblings seriously.

Posted by: Rob (No 1) at August 28, 2003 at 03:52 PM

"Even eggheads occasionally think with their dicks".

Jeebers, could you possibly think of any inducement to do so with MM whispering in your ear? Is he supposed to be some sort of hypocrite because he did what just about every feller on the planet who went somewhere near a movie theatre wanted to do at that point?

Fucking hard marker!

Posted by: Ferg at August 28, 2003 at 06:16 PM

I must have missed the news or am completely isolated, slept too long in my cave...

Micheal Moore is dead? Isn't that the guy that said "shame on you mr. Bush?"

How fitting it's from stuffing his fat face with
crispy creams

Posted by: Lost in space at August 29, 2003 at 12:04 AM

has michael moore turned to even worse forms of crime? (thanks to insta)

Posted by: Mr. Bingley at August 29, 2003 at 12:24 AM

That Emily Jones fisking is worth reading just for its intertainment value! Good job Ms. Jones.

Posted by: Rabidfox at August 29, 2003 at 02:00 AM

Joltin' Joe was born and raised in California.


Literalist...

Posted by: mojo at August 29, 2003 at 02:00 AM

Wait a minute! Has anyone actually *seen* Miss Short, Fat and Bespectacled lately? Hmmm? Seriously...has anybody seen her...Er, somebody better call Arthur...

Posted by: Tongue Boy at August 29, 2003 at 02:19 AM

I hope she didn't go walking into Michael Moore's office with doughnut glaze on her person.

Posted by: Donnah at August 29, 2003 at 06:01 AM

Er. I meant the comment there to go here.

Posted by: Andrea Harris at August 29, 2003 at 11:31 AM