June 02, 2003

SO STAY HOME AND EAT AMPHIBIANS

The Guardian dares to mess with Texas:

Mr Chirac cannot expect to be invited to the Texas ranch any time soon, as Mr Putin was. This may be seen as a blessing in disguise. Texan cuisine is robust, rather than haute. And its red wine is still in the early stages of development.

So is the EU. The difference is that you have to be exposed to a lot more Texan red before you puke.

Posted by Tim Blair at June 2, 2003 07:29 PM
Comments

One I dunno. There's at least one Texan Red who makes me puke everytime I'm not quick enough to hit the mute button ;)

Posted by: Niall at June 2, 2003 at 07:59 PM

Let me guess: Molly Ivins?

Posted by: tim at June 2, 2003 at 08:01 PM

Hey any country which thinks that Woody Allen, Jerry Lewis and Mickey Rourke are geniuses should shut the @#$% up.

Posted by: Joel at June 2, 2003 at 11:55 PM

This is such an arthritic parading of stereotypes, with a gratuitous reference to a drinking problem (one might as easily have said "Mr. Bush was patching over quarrels at his fraternity back when Mr. Chirac was sucking up to Saddam's nuclear program"). Why does anyone, anywhere, listen to any journalists, ever?

Posted by: Mike G at June 3, 2003 at 12:40 AM

Who in their right mind goes to Texas to drink WINE???

Posted by: Eric at June 3, 2003 at 02:49 AM

Excellent question. The Grauniad of course had to bring in the quality of local wine (in Texas, forsooth!) in order to portray the place as a redneck sump. I wonder how many good wineries are in the Grauniad's neighborhood.

Posted by: Harry at June 3, 2003 at 03:02 AM

N.b. I doubt many Texans drink Texan wine. They have this newfangled process called *shipping* that makes it possible to bring products in from foreign countries like California.

Posted by: Harry at June 3, 2003 at 03:04 AM

Sheeeee-it, Harry. T'othern day we wuz drinkin' wine whut come clear from some little Third World country. It were shore good.

We don't drink no Frenchy wines, though.

Posted by: Angie Schultz at June 3, 2003 at 04:02 AM

Behold, the Vanguard of the Noble Proletariat has a girlish giggle about Texas cuisine.


Hey, Guardian: take your 'haute' fried slugs and grape juice and shove 'em up your ass. Sideways.

Meanwhile, I'll have a robust plate of Stubbs BBQ, Threadgill's chicken fried steak and Guerro's enchiladas - washed down with a couple of bottles of Shiner Bock.

Posted by: iowahawk at June 3, 2003 at 04:49 AM

Escondido makes a pinot noir that's better than a lot of the swill labeled "Burgundy" these days, but I would say the Guardian is correct that the Texas reds are still cocooning. No sense drinking them when we have so many lovely Australian imports! The whites are much further along though. Llano Estacado has some really tasty selections and I really like Becker's Chardonnay which has lovely pineapple notes.

Posted by: Shiloh Bucher at June 3, 2003 at 06:34 AM

Why do these nasty plebby little lefties always try so hard to ape the gentry?
The latest wheeze form these intellectually stunted, slack-jawed limp penises (and that's just the women) is that somehow THEY are sophisticated. Mostly, of course there sophistication extends about as far as their education, so their only sophisticated answer to anything is kindergarten marxist politics. It's even worse when they take their kecks off too.
My advice to the lefties (who were nearly always the nerdy guys at school)is leave the snobbish sophistication to we on the right who were trained for it from a very young age at Cranbrook, Kings and other insititutions for the inculcation of shameless greed and the finer things in life.

Posted by: Peter at June 3, 2003 at 09:09 AM

Without Texas grapes where would French wine be?

Posted by: kenesaw at June 3, 2003 at 12:29 PM

Without Texas grapes where would French wine be?

Posted by: kenesaw at June 3, 2003 at 12:30 PM

About 35 years ago, I actually drank some Arkansas sherry, which is pretty close to Texas.
That's a mistake a man makes only once.

Posted by: Harry Eagar at June 3, 2003 at 05:20 PM

http://www.flash.net/~rockware/chili.html

Posted by: nancy reys at June 4, 2003 at 05:31 AM

Next up from The Guardian -- a special section exposť -- Texas doesn't have ski slopes, either!

We do, however, have three of the world's largest airlines headquartered here (AA, CO, SW), and lots of roads.

And criticism from an English newspaper over cuisine? That's a bit like the pot calling the kettle black. Give me chicken fried steak over spotted dick any day!

Posted by: Chipstah at June 4, 2003 at 06:36 AM

Plus, we have more armed pickup trucks than all the countries of the EU put together. Don't mess with Texas.

Posted by: Chipstah at June 4, 2003 at 06:37 AM