Tim Blair

You call "busy" humoring the terminally PC Richard Glover on Sydney ABC radio? What's happening Tim?

I blame Haliburton!

Sorry for the lack of posts; I've been busy. More later.

You've been sleeping, haven't you?

Sleep is for communists!

Until you awake, Tim, may you rest well, and dream of Condi Rice :-)

Tim, I won't believe you're "sorry" until I see a compassionate head-tilt, mister!

Apologies are for the weak! You should disappear for months on end and then reappear without explanation, like I do.

I've noticed you take quite a few unannounced and extended breaks. What's up, have you got a job or something?

You're turning into Margo!

Maybe Andrea can post a poem during your "hiatuses" like they do over at No Thappy John...

I've noticed you take quite a few unannounced and extended breaks. What's up, have you got a job or something?

No, it's because of those long lunches...

Out to lunch, Missing presumed fed?

Never appologise. Your enemies won't accept it and your friends won't need it.

No Thappy John
A poem by Margo Kingston

Bush and Hitler are the same,
For Iraqi deaths I do them blame,
Though Bush is taller by a head,
I wish that both of them were dead.

Alhough my woolly mind has cleared,
It's now much worse than I had feared,
I just heard on the TV news,
That all my woes are caused by Jews.

After a long search, I finally found your site. My granny used to say, that you must never give up to reach a certain aim.
So keep on going like I did it recently.

(OK - just standing in for Tim, and for Uncle, who may have gone to the same Lunch.)
Did you notice how the ABC 7:30 report covered the Eureka story tonight without ANY reference to the ongoing discussion about the various and antipathetic points of view on the subject? Strange, is it not? No, I guess not. Situation normal.

Sorry? Sorry without a power fist is merely a bunch of words.

Team America opened in Sydney today.I saw the first session.Unbelievable good.You mean actors shouldn't be trusted? Gives woodies a new meaning.

Well, actually "sorry" is just one word, but it is a bunch of letters.

Sorry one scene gave woodies a new meaning.

Now, now, now guys, it's obvious why Tim is so busy. He's part of the top-secret Aussie WMD program, developing kangaroo-mounted death rays at a secret laboratory near Alice Springs.

Andrea your online?
Can't you discipline that Blair boy?
Make it a project.

"Sorry for the lack of posts; I've been busy. More later."

Not good enough, Tim.

I think you're a bit of a blodger

Glover was in good form yesterday. Some blue-rinse old biddy rang in about a rape case involving a school girl, implying that she asked for it. Glover ripped into the old bat like Ron Casey on PCP. Today he apologised for going spazmo but he shouldn't have.

...anyway Richard, we don't want girlie-man radio. If someone needs a smack-down, you do it! And don't apologize.

"More later."

So which is it Tim? CBS or NBC?

Boy, am I excited - nothing's happening

And you reckon you've been busy?
What a puss.

OMFG! Funniest God damn story of the YEAR:

http://www.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,4057,11572856%255E421,00.html

Hey, I like the star-spangled fist Noam put on hte cover of his new book (see "busy" link above). That would make a kick-ass T-shirt/logo.

What, is Karl Rove too busy running Ukraine's situation to tell bloggers what to write?

Sorry for the lack of posts; I've been busy. More later.

How long does it really take to put on your pajamas?

Perhaps it's that "in the bathroom with his modem" thing.

Perfectly innocent, though, I'm sure.

"Sorry for the lack of posts; I've been busy. More later."

Yeah yeah, likely story.

perfectsense: "How long does it really take to put on your pajamas?"

I resent the blatant condescension in your tone of post! I DEMAND that you apologize to all the pajamahadeen for that remark, you insensitive clod! Or I will issue a big fat WA on your ass, buster! You don't want a hundred fat guys in PJs on your lawn now, do you?

(Sometimes you have to create the conflict and excitement yourself, I guess.)

"Sorry for the lack of posts; I've been busy. More later."

How elegantly nuanced!

Tim write something on this
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5744,11498606%255E31501,00.html

I know where Tim's been. He's been with Scooby and the Gang over at CBS News busting the ghost of Ed Murrow. Tim and those medling kids won't let ole Dan depart in peace. Or maybe Tim could be with Daphne...while the other kids did the dirty work...rurh rrow, gotta go!

"Sorry for the lack of posts; I've been busy. More later."

Just in case anyone made it down here and forgot what tim wrote.

".... More later."

Yeah, it's always jam tomorrow with you guys. But I want mine NOW! It's my human right. [Delivered with all the foot-stamping petulance of clients of the Left.]

Sorry for the lack of comments; I went for a long walk (I had to walk around Michael Moore). If he gets in my way again I think I'll use crampons to climb his frontside then rappel down the back. That will be faster and I can get back to commenting sooner.

LOL!
You should post this way more often Tim. The comments are priceless. :)

/still in my original jamies

The man wants a day off, the man gets a day off, I say. (I should know, I haven't updated my own blog since before Thanskgiving. "More later.")

You now have 41 comments on the topic of you saying ---- NOTHING. I suspect you have demonic powers.

Are you sure? - I counted 42..

seems like 43 to me, but math never was a strength

Anyway, Rog, you only counted to one-decimal-place accuracy. It's just not good enough. And even then you got it wrong. The real answer now is 43.8710835719836 approx - this comment is unfini

Imagine this were a comment. Would it make the counting complex?

OT: Meanwhile, to while away the time-

A builder up on the third floor needed a saw.
He yelled to his mate down on the ground but matey indicated he couldn't hear him properly. So he decided to use sign language.
He pointed to his eye meaning 'I', his knee meaning 'need' and then moved his hand back and forth in a sawing motion.
His mate nodded that he understood, then immediately pulled down his pants and started masturbating.
Furious, the builder scrambled down the ladder and screamed, "What the hell is wrong with you? I said I needed a saw!"
His mate looked at him, completely taken aback, and shouted back, "I KNOW THAT. I was telling you I'm coming!!!"

Good God, Blair. Do you see what you have unleashed on the world?

..and people say that I never fin

This is not a comment. If you are reading this, then I recommend you see a doctor and take some pills.

Having said that, I reckon Tim's been at the Walkleys. (I'm so pissed - Tony Jones won best interviewer!) Either that or the SOOB festival.

Very unique: a blog about not blogging.

Kind of reminds me of a Brussel blog I was at recently. The least you could do is throw up a graphic for people to ridicule.

I saw 'Hero' last night. It was pretty.

They of atrocious politics and irrepressible harmony once sang:

Well, too much of nothing
Can make a man fell ill at ease
One man’s temper might start to rise
And another man’s might freeze
And there’s a day of long confession
We cannot mock the soul
But when there’s too much of nothing
No one has control.

(Peter, Paul and Mary. Sandy Denny- lyrics)

Its not easy coming all this way to Australia every day only to find it uninhabited. I do have other things to do ya know!

I know this is OT, but my favourite word at the moment is "cahoots"

I would like to see it more frequently used.

when we find zarqawi and/or zawahri we should chop off their cahoots...

A MAVERICK British lawmaker accused by a newspaper of receiving secret payments from former Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein was awarded substantial libel damages by a judge today.

George Galloway, a rebel expelled from Prime Minister Tony Blair's Labour Party for his vehement opposition to the Iraq war, should receive £150,000 ($373,470), the judge ruled.

The Daily Telegraph newspaper said it had based the series of stories in April 2003 - one of which called the MP a "traitor" - on documents discovered by a reporter inside Baghdad government offices following the fall of Saddam.

Mr Galloway, 50, who now represents a new left-wing party he co-founded, denied what he called the "outrageous and incredibly damaging" allegations.

The Telegraph had not sought to uphold the veracity of the claims, but argued under that British libel laws it was protected, as it had pursued responsible journalism in the public interest.

Mr Galloway beamed as judge Sir David Eady gave his decision following a long, and at times bitter, legal fight at London's High Court.

In the light of the allegations, and the Telegraph's refusal to withdraw its claims, Eady said he was obliged to "make an award for the purposes of restoring (Mr Galloway's) reputation".

"I do not think those purposes would be achieved by any award less than £150,000," the judge said.

The verdict is a resounding victory for Mr Galloway, who has proved a thorn in the side of a series of Labour leaders, and has won a string of libel victories against newspapers who, as he sees it, tried to smear him.

Mr Galloway had close contacts with Saddam's regime for many years, earning him the parliamentary nickname "the honourable member for Baghdad Central", but insisted he opposed the Iraqi government.

In 1994, Mr Galloway caused outrage in Britain when he was filmed telling Saddam: "Sir, I salute your courage, your strength, your indefatigability."

Mr Galloway insisted the praise was intended for the Iraqi people collectively.

The Daily Telegraph articles had accused Mr Galloway of receiving large sums of money from Iraq's oil-for-food programme under which Baghdad's trade was restricted during years of UN sanctions.

Oh, you'll want to blog about this:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=912&item=2284567400

NOW we know where evil Bushalliburtonazi got the damned thing!!!

Now, now, now guys, it's obvious why Tim is so busy. He's part of the top-secret Aussie WMD program, developing kangaroo-mounted death rays at a secret laboratory near Alice Springs.

Pah. Your kangaroo death rays are no match for the nuclear cyborg death-sheep of New Zealand.

I'll have more to say about this topic when I wake up.

The dog ate my posts.

Tim: You need do some campaigning for the 2004 blog awards.Vote Blair/Harris or die! Well, maybe you can blog for a better message campaign theme...that one didn't do so well up here.

You could always send Andrea out in her fatigues with leather keyboard and whip to stump for you. (hint) I hear evangelicals are the big voters to go after this season.

I'm drinking an Aussie beer called James Squire Original Amber Ale.

Is it supposed to taste like this?

Spiny Norman — "Never explain and never apologize, mister. It's a sign of weakness." — Col. Nathan Biddles, She Wore a Yellow Ribbon

Depends - what does it taste like coming back up - that is the true measure.

Keep posting.

We need to get to 100 before Tim comes back!

Razor — No luck there. With me and beer, the only way out is through... if I hadda pay for it, it's staying down.

So, how 'bout those knicks?

Gerard Jackson (brookesnews.com) gives Tim a backhander. Take that, Tim!

Sparkling endorsements from three of Brookes' dedicated fans

The fearless rightwing Tim Blair thinks our economics editor deserves to be "blacklisted". Well, there's no pleasing some people, including some rightwing journos.

Seems Gerry is just about the only Australian arch-conservative hated by the right and other conservatives. He's always banging on about how the IPA is a bunch of wankers and how much they despise him. At least he despises Phillip Adams.

Slacker!

So what did the cheapskate housing developer say to his fencewrights?

"Sorry for the lack of posts!"

thank you, thank you, thank you....

I'll be here all week, so escape while you still can ....

This is NOT a joke, altho. it would seem to be something 'The Onion' would write.

Guess what the UN has declared Dec. 9 to be?

UN International Anti-Corruption Day

No kidding. You MUST see this to believe it. Here is the URL:

Anti-Corruption Day

Along with an intro. to what International Anti-Corruption Day is, you'll find Resource Guides, Fact Sheets, Video Spots, Posters and Logos. All produced by the 'honest folks' at the UN to promote global anti-corruption.

100 posts......are we there yet ??
these pretzels are making me thirsty

No, we're only at 72.

This is totally irresponsible - I have a report to finish by tomorrow

All produced by the 'honest folks' at the UN to promote global anti-corruption.

See? The UN does have a sense of humour.

I'm laughing already...

dinsdale?

On an interesting note, in a sad act of pathetic fandom, I tried to get my zine signed by the world's most famous blogger, Tim Blair, at Straight Out of Brisbane tonight. Alas, he buggered off with Merlin Luck before I got the chance and I returned home in a state of utter sadness and despair (I was going to raffle it after all).

Sigh! He doesn't look like his photo, by the way.

He buggered Merlin Luck? Now that's one for the record books...

Mmmm, one for the gossip columns perhaps. More correctly, he went off in another direction with Merlin Luck (buggering probably did not come into it). However, girls I can confirm that Mr Blair is a bit of a spunk and thus many would not mind taking it from behind from Australia's most favourite blogger.

Who the fuck
Is Merlin Luck?

So, Tim, are you going to update your Kerry-alienating-statement poll now that the Kerry campaign has signed onto the Ohio Dems' demand for a recount?

You're a blogger. Your not supposed to have a real life.

my sister got bit by a moose

This aimless thread reminds me about the "Seinfeld Show".

Wasn't that supposed to be a show about nothing.

Which somehow turned out to be spectacularly successful.

Anyhow, that's my contribution to the "100" post effort.

Carry on.

Wi nøt trei a høliday in Sweden this yer?

See the løveli lakes

The wonderful telephøne system

And mani interesting furry animals

I have to say I'm impressed with these new latex and alkyd interior paints. They go on real nice, dry super fast and the rollers and brushes clean up with water.

Is your sister OK, Mr Bingley?

i used the stain version of them on the shingles of my house, and i have to agree.

Andrea also seems to be AWOL. Hmmmm

Andrea also seems to be AWOL. Hmmmm

Sorry about the dual posts. I wasn't trying to influence the numbers. I was just doing an "Adolph Eichmann"

If you're going to Sweden, don't forget to pack your å, ä, and ö.

No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink".

I'm sory, I'm in Vietnam and I don't speak sưedíh, but ì I have the right font I can ửite in vietnamế

đid you mean she ứa bit by a mốe?

>"my sister got bit by a moose"

I think she should start dating people instead of moose.

I don't understand. If Svenge is your sister's brother-in-law. Isn't he your brother-in-law too?

I don't understand. If Svenge is your sister's brother-in-law. Isn't he your brother-in-law too?

Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti...

I don't understand. If Svenge is your sister's brother-in-law. Isn't he your brother-in-law too?

should triple posts count towards the 100?

Oh Fuck!

There I go again!

No, totally unacceptable and I apologise with a compassionate HT and a very weak PF.

Interesting that the DJIA and the NAZ are both up despite the weak job numbers

Oh, BTW

Happy anti-Corruption day to all!

Shouldn't every day be anti-corruption day at the UN.

How can anyone write-"off topic"?

What goes clop__clop__clop__bang!__clop__clop? An Amish drive-by shooting.

Do not click on this link.

There, that's my bad deed for the day. Mwahahahaha!

>Guess what the UN has declared Dec. 9 to be?
>
>UN International Anti-Corruption Day

Does this mean that there is one day a year when they don't take bribes, defraud or steal?

There are llamas in the river...

I wore jeans to work today. I almost wore khakis.

OM dear G!

Evil Pundit you've unleashed a cavalcade of crazy.

NOBODY MOVE. STAY EXACTLY WHERE YOU ARE.

I'VE LOST MY WALLET!

...

OK, FOUND IT. It was in my other pocket. Carry on.

I'm awake now. And I'll just have this to say about that, when the time is right, and not a moment sooner.

I guess I picked the wrong thread to stop sniffing glue.

There are llamas in the river...

Oh, thank GOD there's someone out there who knows! Bingster and I were terribly worried. And now Richard, for something completely different...

Executive Producer
JOHN GOLDSTONE & "RALPH" The Wonder Llama

Assisted by
EARL J. LLAMA
MIKE Q. LLAMA III
SY LLAMA
MERLE Z. LLAMA IX

and I had nothing to do wik:

Suggestive poses for the
Møøse suggested by VIC ROTTER

Dear Monkey Fan,

It only gets worse.

I believe we may have uncovered the recruiting centre for The Guardian.

SHHH! WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?

...mystery sound...
THERE IT GOES AGAIN!

Oh wait! It's Kerry. He's about to make a speech. Just clearing his throat I guess.

Yep, this is exactly the use Al Gore had in mind when he invented the internet!

Someone brought 8 pastries in today and 5 had jelly in them. Why couldn't a person bring in 8 cream cheese pastries? Or maybe 4 CC and 4 sticky buns? Something edible. I just can't figure it out.

"Does this mean that there is one day a year when they don't take bribes, defraud or steal?"

Giving the UN a huge benefit of the doubt, yes. They are on a 12-step anti-corruption program modeled after Alcoholics Anonymous.

First step is *try* to make it through a day without bribing, defrauding, or stealing. They are aiming for Dec. 9 as this first step day.

We all wish them luck in their recovery.

How about an apology for the lame post that follows?

We apologise for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked.

Large møøse on the left hand side of the screen
in the third scene from the end, given a thorough
grounding in Latin, French and "O" Level Geography by BO BENN

We apologise again for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.

>First step is *try* to make it through a day
>without bribing, defrauding, or stealing. They are
>aiming for Dec. 9 as this first step day.

All of them or just some of them?

"All of them or just some of them?"

They'll aim for one or some and hit none. Then it's business (graft, bribes, kick-backs) as usual.

Actually the UN's Anti-Corruption Day DOESN'T APPLY TO THE UN. It's only for countries.

Based on how the UN seems to think, I'm surprised they didn't use Israel and the US as poster kids for corrupt governments, with Sudan, Libya, Rwanda and others as poster kids for non-corrupt governments. Naturally, the UN views itself as the best example of a non-corrupt entity.

The only way to understand the UN's terms these days is to remember George Orwell and newspeak. Corrupt and non-corrupt don't mean the same to the UN as they do to the rest of us. It's very nuanced.

Anyone see the following..

Al Jazeera was established by U.S. and Israeli agents in order to present a bad image of Islam to the world. (Tehran Times)

Here's the URL where it's being reported and discussed:

When In Doubt Blame The Jews

That's right Al Jazeera is run by the US and Jews, according to the Tehran Times.

I think I'll quit my job and break into comedy. The news these days provides enough material so I wouldn't have to even bother thinking up my own.

And then she ate one of the three edible pastries -- the pecan roll no less.

Brrrrrrrrrrrr...

I believe you have isolated the Gaurdian gene pool.

Sorry 'the Grauniad jean poul'.

*Thanks Puce*

Cuidado!
Cuidado!
Cuidado!
Cuidado!
se lla-a-a-amas!

Cuidado!
Cuidado!
Cuidado!
Cuidado!
se lla-a-a-amas!

"Andrea also seems to be AWOL. Hmmmm"

Oh, I'm here. And my revenge, when it comes, will be sweet. Bwahahahahahaha!

She means to win Wimbledon!

Mr Walkley in cahoots with Aunty? A.M.,P.M. Lateline L.N.L? ETC .GOOD NEWS!!!! B.B.C. Is in serious trouble for claiming DOW has taken full responsibility for Bhopal and is willing to compensate victims fully e.t.c. Obviously causing serious misery to already devastated people.They was hoaxed and oh no--"c'est impossible"--The imposter who did the deed sounded CANADIAN................

andrea! por favor, ajuda me! necesito una llama nueva!

You need a new llama?

'Muslims Have no Future as Long as They are Subjected to Religious Thought'
memri.org

please say a prayer for the author, Kuwaiti progressive scholar Ahmad Al-Baghdadi, a political science lecturer at Kuwait University

We are now up to 139 comments on the most ridiculous, aimless, pointless comment thread in the history of the blogosphere. Even by our standards here in Ohio, this is getting ridiculous. I feel strangely proud to have been a part of this.

Tim, have you nothing to say? By what sorcery are you able to make this happen?

guinsPen,

I think there's some redundancy in that title you quoted.

On the other hand, if the religous thought were Buddhist*, say, they might get along fine other people and the rest of us could peaceably ignore them.

Pushing that infidel thought a bit further, I'd like to propose a gedanken experiment: If some illiterate approached you in the street and said that he'd spoken to God and that he had a mind to pass on (his purported version of) the gist of the conversation, would you give him a wide berth, or would you embrace him as the true prophet? [I hate that word "embrace" and I wish that you would desist from using it. Ed.]

Yes, me too.

What I don't understand is why 1,400 years or so makes any difference. I wonder if someone could explain to me why some people believe that stuff in a way that actually makes any fucking sense.

*I'm really trying to avoid any occidental slant on this. Y'all will understand that's de rigeur nowadays. And I'm a sucker for high fashion.

And two "early birds" (i.e., men without kids to dress for school) ate the other two edible pastries. Leaving the jelly pastries. By late afternoon, the five pastries were still untouched. Well OK, they were touched. Repeatedly. By employees hoping they turned into something other than jelly pastries. A few corners were even carved off by desperately hungry people. But the core jelly depositories remained.

Wotan: well, that would depend on how convincing he was. I make no claims to being particularly discerning, and my skepticism might be mostly naive cynicism, but I am hard to convince about such things, so he and his visions would have to be impressive. Well, there you have the viewpoint of one other person. I can't speak for the rest of Earth's six billion+ people. I can't even explain the attraction so many people have to Survivor. I'll bet you that show's same fan wouldn't want to watch an hour of their own family in their own living room but a passel of whiny, boring people on tv? Suddenly it's attractive.

SabinaSam: not eating the jelly center -- that's just wrong.

Andrea: Thank you. Now I know for sure that there are at least two of us. It's nice not to be alone.

SabinaSam: I have followed your posts with a keen appreciation and the significance of your comments has not escaped me. Ordinarily I wouldn't stray off topic but curiosity has got the better of me: could I ask you kindly what flavor the jelly is?

LOL to both of you.

"What I don't understand is why 1,400 years or so makes any difference. I wonder if someone could explain to me why some people believe that stuff in a way that actually makes any fucking sense."

Hell, I don't understand why 6,000 years makes a difference when you say some book is the word of God. It all seems like death-fearing nonsense to me. But hey, whatever gets you through the day. Just don't lop off my dome or try to teach your myths in school science classes.

Dave S: Amen to that, friend. Now we are three.