November 06, 2004

PREPARE TO BE SHAKEN, AMERICANS!

A Guardian reader wants his fellow Guardianistas to volunteer for suicide missions:

After Operational Clark County, I suggest Operation Rock the Voter - well-meaning Guardian readers volunteer to visit America, and are assigned a single Bush voter, who they then shake violently and slap around a bit, and point at any given 5 second video clip of Bush and scream, "Look! He's a fucking moron! Can't you see that? Everyone else on the bloody planet can, what the hell is wrong with you?". Followed by some more violent shaking.

Followed by the death of the Guardian reader. Anger at Bush's re-election has provoked an unusual response in Seattle:

Riley Sweeney, an 18-year-old Western Washington University freshman, elected to wear his protest: He showed up in a gray fedora and checkered blue bathrobe.

"I am in mourning because of the decision our country has made," he said. "I don't think I'll be wearing pants for a while."

Panties, however, are another matter. On other election-related clothing issues, the Mysterious Bush Bulge is finally explained:

Call off the conspiracy freaks. Now it can be told: That mysterious bulge on President Bush’s back during the first presidential debate was not an electronic device feeding him answers, but a strap holding his bulletproof vest in place.

Posted by Tim Blair at November 6, 2004 01:50 AM
Comments

they should send one here to Richmond, VA. the guy could take in the sights, and maybe even take a side trip to see the monuments in DC. then he could shake me and i will kill him. he will have at least seen something of historical interest before he goes.

Posted by: Sean at November 6, 2004 at 02:00 AM

A Guardian reader wants his fellow Guardianistas to volunteer for suicide missions:

Bring it on, Guardianista weenies!

Posted by: Rebecca at November 6, 2004 at 02:01 AM

I hereby volunteer to be subjected to a Guardian reader violent shaking and slapping around. Please fly out here to Missouri and look me up. I'll provide directions once you land in an airport in state. You may want to spend a few weeks in the gym beforehand, just so you know.

Posted by: Brent at November 6, 2004 at 02:11 AM

"not an electronic device feeding him answers, but a strap holding his bulletproof vest in place"


Sorry Winston, the ministry of truth has already deseminated the necessary doubleplusgood information regarding the presidents bulge. The information you posted is a meaningless work of fiction soon to be forgotten.


Posted by: BBC at November 6, 2004 at 02:18 AM

Uh, I'd like to see them try that here in the oil fields of CA, or the oil fields anywhere. Roughnecks aren't exactly a bunch of pasty white cream puffs.

As for me? Two words.. rock hammer.

Posted by: Lydia at November 6, 2004 at 02:19 AM
That mysterious bulge on President Bush’s back during the first presidential debate was not an electronic device feeding him answers, but a strap holding his bulletproof vest in place.

Uh, no shit.

Posted by: Pious Agnostic at November 6, 2004 at 02:21 AM

Yet another manifestation of their cluelessness about America.

Most, if not all, "red" states issue permits to qualified citizens to carry concealed handguns for self-defense.

And I'm quite sure that "violent shaking" and "slapping" by a total stranger would give these permittees sufficient legal justification to blow their s*$t away.

Posted by: Captain Holly at November 6, 2004 at 02:21 AM

There is a reason why we have the 2nd admendment (right to bear arms), and I have 7 of them.....bring it on, weenies!!!! Visit the grand state of Ohio, eat some food, show up at my house, try to assault me, and get shot!!!!

Posted by: j at November 6, 2004 at 02:23 AM

I thought I read that the bulge had been identified as the Presidents Backbone.

Posted by: mapleleaf at November 6, 2004 at 02:23 AM

Can I request a busload of Guardian fellas to join me here in Houston?

We did so well hosting the Super Bowl and All-Star Game, I think we could whip up a REALLY fun time for these blokes :)

Shaken, then stirred.... mmmmmmm, can't wait.

Don't bother with the annual tooth-brushing, fellas... we'll take care of that for you.

Posted by: Glen at November 6, 2004 at 02:24 AM

The leftists get (figuratively) slapped across the face at the ballot box, and yet, their delusions of grandeur continue unabated.

Posted by: Spiny Norman at November 6, 2004 at 02:40 AM

PLEASE send me a Guardian reader. I'm running low on kibble for the cats...

Posted by: richard mcenroe at November 6, 2004 at 02:45 AM

Isn't the definition of insanity "repeating the same behavior over and over while expecting different results"?

Posted by: Jim Treacher at November 6, 2004 at 02:47 AM

I read the grauniad for the amusing errors, but not anymore as I've outsourced to the dailyablution.com

Anyway, what if I was to shake your hand really vigorously and say "well done!," "Thanks for being different from the Europussies!"

Remember : Transnational Socialists cannot tolerate political diversity!

Posted by: Rob Read at November 6, 2004 at 02:50 AM

I'm not sure about the Guardian reader, but the lady in the "chess" ad on the left can come to the house and shake me vigorously.

Posted by: monkeyboy at November 6, 2004 at 02:51 AM

Maybe the violent shaking is really just trembling with impotent rage. Whatever it is, I LIKE IT!

Posted by: Doc at November 6, 2004 at 02:55 AM

I will start reading Al Guardian every day from now on. Reading the whining messages made me feel real good - they reemphasized the fact that the LLL's lost again.

Posted by: jorgen at November 6, 2004 at 02:58 AM

Jeez, when I first saw the photo it took me 10 seconds to surmise that it was a kevlar vest.

Would any of us go out to a big public gathering without one when several books and plays have been written fantasizing about OUR assassination?

Posted by: Mr Vee at November 6, 2004 at 02:59 AM

someone needs to explain to the Guardianistas that they should steer well clear of Texas, Bush's home state...there's a little thing called "Concealed Carry" down here. The Guardianista may just well get far enough to slap someone, but the victim will have the last word...I guar-OHNtee!

As for me, if anyone like that tries it, I promise : the last words they'll hear from me are "I know forensic anthropology, and they'll never find you." P.S. Houston's a big ol' swamp....

Posted by: Sharon Ferguson at November 6, 2004 at 03:01 AM

"Can I just say that people in Utah are reputed to be mad as snakes and voting for Bush to the tune of over 70% has confirmed that for me."

No booth for the Mormons at the diversity fair.

Posted by: Donnah at November 6, 2004 at 03:06 AM

The folks in the "I'm Sorry" group look like they could use a good whack upside the head. Perhaps the Guardianistas could help them out.

Posted by: Ernie G at November 6, 2004 at 03:12 AM

Since the Guardian readers apparently still are in a shell-shocked coma, perhaps the shaking will wake him up and he will begin to see realities? But then again: Nah, if he was capable of seeing realities, he wouldn't be reading Al Guardian in the first place.

Posted by: jorgen at November 6, 2004 at 03:21 AM

How about we start our own photo gallery? All the folks that voted for GWB the second time around could be holding signd saying things like

"I dunnit and I'm GLAD, y'hear? GLAD! BWAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahahahahahahahaha..."

Posted by: mojo at November 6, 2004 at 03:25 AM

I volunteer too. As an American, I feel the need for one of my more enlightened EUropean 'brothers' to tell me how to think.
Is there a limit? You know, like you can only take 6 squirrels a day. Can I sign up for more than one victi.. errr, teacher?

Posted by: Veeshir at November 6, 2004 at 03:29 AM

"I don't think I'll be wearing pants for a while."

Can we all just stand back for a moment and appreciate the sheer beauty of that statement?

Posted by: Emily at November 6, 2004 at 03:36 AM

As a Kinky Bush Voter, I volunteer to be slapped, shaken, and yelled at by an Anti-Bush German chick all done up in leather. I promise to play along.

Anyone else who tries it is in for a severe beating.

Posted by: Kinky Bush Voter at November 6, 2004 at 03:36 AM

If they want my address, all they have to do is ask.

Posted by: WOHBuckeye at November 6, 2004 at 03:40 AM

Oh goody! Idiot pacifists declaring anarchism. I believe we are witness to a meltdown of the mindless.

Looking forward to some great entertainment!


Posted by: syn at November 6, 2004 at 03:45 AM

Us rednecks in rural Georgia would like to see what a Guardian reader looks like. First though,he'll has to pass the Pit Bull smell test. Don't come round here smelling like no Oscar Wilde. After that, we'll give him a tour of the armory and for entertainment we'll get the Blue Ticks off the porch and take him on a Coon Hunt. By morning he'll be welcome to all the shakin' and shoutin' he wants. I sure do hope he doesn't defile our beloved president, George Bush on his video. Here 'bouts that is considered disrespectful and disrespect merits a thrashin"
Y'all come on over real soon, y'heah.

Posted by: EddieP at November 6, 2004 at 04:05 AM

"... assigned a single Bush voter, who they then shake violently and slap around a bit...".
WTF? Are you saying you're going to do this after the election? Or, are you somehow going to be time transported to November 1? Who's the moron here?
By the way any Guardianista who would like my address here in Houston to visit me please email me and it will be provided. Better yet, give me your address and I'll come visit you.

Posted by: bc at November 6, 2004 at 04:32 AM

There is a lot we western Washingtonians blame Seattle for, but the pantless wonder can't be one. Western Washington University is located about 80 miles north of Seattle in Bellingham, Washington, a small city that can claim WWU and being a popular destination for our Canadian cousins on shopping trips.

Posted by: Tom at November 6, 2004 at 04:35 AM

I don't think I'll be wearing pants for a while.

As a graduate of Western Washington University, I know that most of the students at this leftist sinkhole don't use their brains either.

Posted by: perfectsense at November 6, 2004 at 04:35 AM

Captain Holly: The Governor signed Ohio's Concealed Carry Law in January.

Re: Bulge

Dang! I was hoping it was the strap from his shoulder holster (actually, I always thought it was the vest).

Posted by: CGeib at November 6, 2004 at 04:44 AM

Anyone with two synapses to rub together knew it was a vest. I took one look at it and said "Good, the Prez is wearing a ballistic panel. I bet it pisses him off to have to do it."

Posted by: R C Dean at November 6, 2004 at 04:51 AM

I don't get it. The Aussies did the same thing with Howard and nobody offered to shake them.
Do we look wussier than the Aussies?
Is Australia too far to go?
What gives?

Posted by: Richard Aubrey at November 6, 2004 at 05:04 AM

1) I swear the people who read that newspaper have reinforced concrete for skulls. It would take a jack hammer to get through. You think the response they got to the Ohio letters would have clued them in. If a Guardian reader comes up to an American and starts shaking and slapping them one of two things will happen.
a) If it's a man they shake they will be laying on the floor with a black eye wondering why the room is spinning. That's if they're lucky.
b) If it's a woman they shake they will be singing soprano for a while after being kneed in the balls. and probably they'd get a face full of pepper spray to boot.

2) Someone needs to tell that boy in Seattle that going around in a bathrobe and fedora to protest "how stupid" everyone who voted for Bush is doesn't help prove his point. We should buy him a dictionary so he can look up the word "irony". Also it's almost winter, if he doesn't give this up in a few weeks he's going to discover a new definition of "blue balled".

3) About the bulge in Bush's jacket....DUH! I've been getting a kick out of listening to all the nuts try and guess what it is, though. :-) I'm kind of sorry the truth is out of the bag...errr, jacket.

Posted by: Jeremy at November 6, 2004 at 05:42 AM

Western Washington University, eh? I lived in the Bellingham area when it was a state college. Nice to see things haven't changed much since then [/sarcasm].

I hope that 18 year student gets a cold northeast wind up his arse!

Posted by: The Real JeffS at November 6, 2004 at 05:49 AM

Richard, they said something about being allergic to kangaroos, or was that allergic to common sense...hmmmm.

Posted by: Jeremy at November 6, 2004 at 06:07 AM

I think the only thing the Guardianistas could shake is the "thang" you shake at the urinal -but remember, if you shake more than twice, you're playing with it!

Posted by: Son of a Pig and a Monkey at November 6, 2004 at 06:18 AM

try this for a larf


George Bush in Hell

While walking down the street one day, George "Dubya" Bush is shot and
killed by a disgruntled NRA member. His soul arrives in heaven, and he
is met by St. Peter at the Pearly Gates.

"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Pete. "Before you settle in, it
seems there is a problem: We seldom know what to do with a Republican
in these parts, and the same goes for you".

"No problem, just let me in - I'm a believer," says Dubya. St. Pete
shakes his head. "I'd like to just let you in, but I have orders from
the Man himself. He says you have to spend one day in Hell and one day
in Heaven. Then you must choose where you'll live for eternity."

"But, I've already made up my mind," cries Dubya. "I want to be in
Heaven." "I'm sorry, but we have our rules," St. Pete says. And with
that, Pete escorts Dubya to an elevator and he goes down, down, down,
all the way to Hell. The doors open, and Dubya finds himself in the
middle of a lush golf course - the sun is shining in a cloudless sky,
the temperature a perfect 72 degrees.

In the distance is a beautiful clubhouse. Standing in front of it is
his dad and thousands of other Republicans who had helped him out over
the years - people like Karl Rove, Dick Cheney, and Jerry Falwell.
Everyone is laughing and casually but expensively dressed.

They run to greet Dubya, hug him, and reminisce about the good times
they had getting rich at the expense of the "suckers and peasants."
They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar.
The Devil himself comes up to Bush with a frosty drink. "Have a
Margarita and relax, Dubya!"

"Uh, I can't drink no more, I took a pledge," says Junior, dejectedly.
The Devil laughs. "This is Hell, son: you can drink and eat all you
want and not worry, and it just gets better from there!" Dubya takes
the drink and finds himself liking the Devil, who he thinks is a really
very friendly guy who tells funny jokes and pulls hilarious nasty
pranks, kind of like a Yale Skull and Bones brother with real horns.

They are having such a great time that, before he realizes it, it's
time to go. Everyone gives him a big hug and waves as Bush steps on the
elevator and heads upward. When the elevator door reopens, Bush is in
Heaven again and St. Pete is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit
Heaven," the old man says, opening the gate. So for 24 hours, Bush is
made to hang out with a bunch of honest, good-natured people who enjoy
each other's company, talk about things other than money, and treat
each other decently. Not a nasty prank or frat boy joke among them; no
fancy country clubs and, while the food tastes great, it's not caviar
or lobster.

And these people are all middle class, he doesn't see anybody he knows,
and he isn't even treated like someone special! Worst of all, to Dubya,
Jesus turns out to be some kind of Jewish hippie with his endless
"peace" and "do unto others" jive. "Whoa," Dubya says uncomfortably to
himself, "Pat Robertson never prepared me for this!"

The day done, St. Peter returns and says to Dubya, "Well then, you've
spent a day in Hell and a day in Heaven. Now choose where you want to
live for eternity."

With the "Jeopardy" theme playing softly in the background, Dubya
reflects for a minute, then answers: "Well, I would never have thought
I'd say this -- I mean, Heaven has been delightful and all, but I
really think I belong in Hell with my friends."

So Pete escorts Dubya to the elevator and he goes down, down, down, all
the way to Hell. The doors of the elevator open, and he is in the
middle of a barren scorched earth covered with garbage and toxic
industrial waste - kind of like Houston. He is horrified to see all of
his friends dressed in rags and chained together, picking up the trash
and putting it in black bags. They are groaning and moaning in pain,
faces and hands black with grime. The Devil come over to Dubya and puts
an arm around his shoulder. "I don't understand," says a shocked
Dubya. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a
clubhouse and we drank and ate caviar...I drank booze. We screwed
around and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of
garbage, and everybody looks miserable."

The Devil looks at Dubya and smiles slyly.

"Yesterday we were campaigning; today you voted for us."

Posted by: wbatman at November 6, 2004 at 06:20 AM

If the Daily Wanker reader starts shaking me I'm laible to start foaming. Then we'll match.

Posted by: Paul Zrimsek at November 6, 2004 at 06:22 AM

wbatman

my irony meter must be pegged out, because your little story doesn't even make the needle twitch

i'll try again in four years

Posted by: Son of a Pig and a Monkey at November 6, 2004 at 06:29 AM

Please come to Richmond. I've got a .20 gauge I haven't used yet. Or, in the alternative, I'll cover them with alfalfa and let the Imperial Warren of Killer Lagomorphs™ take care of the matter.

And I'm a grandmother. Go ahead, make my day.

Elizabeth
Imperial Keeper

Posted by: Elizabeth at November 6, 2004 at 06:30 AM

Please please please let the Guardian send their readers HERE. Come to New Jersey. We would LOVE for you to show us the light. Really. No. Don't pay attention to the fact that The Sopranos is filmed here. It's a TV show. NOT based on reality (cough cough). Really. Come to America. We welcome you.

Posted by: Kathleen A at November 6, 2004 at 06:32 AM

ha ha ha ha ha!!!!

That's a good one, wbatman! Woo-hoo!

OK, I've got one for you...

KNOCK, KNOCK

Who's there?

John.

John Who?

John Kerry. I'm 100 times wealthier than Bush, I've got five times more homes, I ride $8000 bicycles, I only hang around with other uber-rich people, and I couldn't be bothered to piss on a prole like you if you were on fire. And you voted for me! Ha, ha! Sucker!

Posted by: Dave S. at November 6, 2004 at 07:01 AM


Of course it was a bullet proof vest. I realised it immediately, like I am sure many others did; and mentioned it to my husband who said that for obvious reasons the campaign is not mentioning it. ie the shooters would aim elsewhere.

So we gaffawed our way through Salon and Renses enhanced pictures by NASA scientists 'proving' Bush was wired. We read a report by a translator (on rense) saying he thought President Bush was such a genius and had an amazing and incomprehensible hold on facts about Indonesia, and spoke fluently without notes, UNTIL he realised that in fact it must mean he was wired as no one could be that good, although like all conspiracy theorists he saw nothing. It was after seeing the debates thats he 'knew' it was impossible for President Bush to have such an amazing grasp and not even need any notes.

"During those 90 minutes, President Bush not only covered all the points, he covered them quite well and without any notes! Not once during the entire meeting did he look at any notes or receive cues from anyone present in discussing the Indonesian political situation with depth and intelligence. I was astonished! "How could this be?" I asked myself."

Rense here.


Salon here.


Posted by: dawn at November 6, 2004 at 07:06 AM

Goodie,can't wait to bitch slap few guardian readers right here in PA.
We couldn't deliver our state for our President and we have a lot of fight bottled up.
Deer season will be opening in 3 weeks,can we paint the luvvies with a bull's eye as target practice?

Posted by: Fly at November 6, 2004 at 07:28 AM

I'm glad Elizabeth the Imperial Keeper is on our side! Wisdom, guts and experience.

Posted by: syn at November 6, 2004 at 07:32 AM

There's is more Bush voters than people in Britain, I think.

Posted by: Quentin George at November 6, 2004 at 08:12 AM

The Guardianistas may want to avoid Ohio in their little experiment. Ohio has a "concealed carry" law.

(Which trumps the Guardian's "Concealed Kerry" eveery time...)

Posted by: Steven Den Beste at November 6, 2004 at 08:27 AM

Emily... re: ""I don't think I'll be wearing pants for a while."

Can we all just stand back for a moment and appreciate the sheer beauty of that statement?"

Standing back, concentrating on the beauty of it all. Such dedication, such sincerity, such motivation...

*snigger**choke**snicker**choke**ha!**guffaw*

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Beautiful post, Emily :). I love your full grasp of liberalthink... that's a valuable asset in this cultural war! I think you've managed to capture the idiocy of the left in full flower!

:D

Posted by: mamapajamas at November 6, 2004 at 09:16 AM

Oh dear. It appears the Guardian readers have discovered Mormon-bashing.

But savor the irony of this comment:

Utah has always been a nutters' state. Look at the restrictive lives they lead.

Yes, but in Utah I can legally walk into any gun store, buy a handgun, fill out a form and wait a few minutes, take possession of it, walk out, load it, and drive away with it in my glovebox or on my person.

In the enlightened United Kingdom, not even ol' Prince Charles, the Heir to the Throne, can do that.

Now, pray tell, who truly lives a "restrictive" life?

Posted by: Captain Holly at November 6, 2004 at 09:26 AM

What in hell does a person think not wearing pants is going to do besides convince others he's an idiot?

Steven Den Beste: LOL! (and glad to see you're still around.)

Posted by: Jim C. at November 6, 2004 at 09:32 AM

It could have been worse. The Guardian pulled "Operation Clark County II", where rather than writing to the voters, the idea was to shoot them.

You can see the plan at

http://website.lineone.net/~jancoggan/wfea.htm

Posted by: Laban Tall at November 6, 2004 at 09:53 AM

"I don't think I'll be wearing pants for a while."

Mebbe he's gotten himself a yeast infection.

Man these lefty Brits still do not understand America at all. If OBL and Saddam Hussein don't scare us why in the world would they think that a bunch of tea sippin' pink panty wearing pussies would? I know that where I live if any of these witless Brits tried to berate and/or slap people around a great many of them would end up in intensive care eating their meals through a straw the rest would end up dying of lead poisoning.

Posted by: Harry in Atlanta at November 6, 2004 at 10:47 AM

Hey Wbatman, got one fer ya. What do you call 10,000 liberals on the Canadian border? A good start.

Posted by: YoJimbo at November 6, 2004 at 10:48 AM

I think the kid's embarassed to admit what he did in his pants when he saw Ohio go to Bush ...

As for me, if I knew a hot, angry British babe was coming to give me a good shag -- err, shake -- well, I wouldn't be wearing pants, either.

Kinda makes me wish it wasn't a hoax designed to troll for more angry hate-mail for the Guardian to publish.

(For the record, your Australian women are hotter.)

Posted by: Liberal Incontinence at November 6, 2004 at 11:10 AM

Panties, however, are another matter"

Hang on there tim!
Stop insulting the crossdressers for Bush party!

Posted by: davo at November 6, 2004 at 11:20 AM

wbathead: that's an old joke that's been making the rounds ever since the first bbs discussion group was formed. Just change the names of the principal characters to whichever set of politicians/candidates/entertainers/etc. are currently the center of controversy. So, if you thought you were "shocking" everyone here with that moldy oldie, you weren't, you were just boring us.

Posted by: Andrea Harris at November 6, 2004 at 12:45 PM

Utah has always been a nutters' state. Look at the restrictive lives they lead.

Now I REALLY can't wait to move there! 70% Red turnout, a slam from the Guardian - my future home is looking more attractive every day.

Posted by: Sonetka at November 6, 2004 at 01:09 PM

I don't think I'll be wearing pants for a while

He already sounds like he doesn't have any balls.

If he has, they'll freeze off come winter.

Posted by: pogmahone at November 6, 2004 at 01:09 PM

Re: Texas.
there's a little thing called "Concealed Carry" down here. The Guardianista may just well get far enough to slap someone, but the victim will have the last word...I guar-OHNtee!

Actually, the number of people shot by people carrying legally is actually pretty low. If those inspired by the Guardian find themselves facing a not-so-helpless victim, but surrender or flees immediately, they should survive the attempted slapping.

Which probably means the slapper will have the last word. Something like "DON'T HURT MEEEEEEE!!!"

Posted by: Patrick Chester at November 6, 2004 at 01:41 PM

CAn we just start nuking things - this is getting completely out of hand. I certainly hope western europe doesn't need us in the near future to bail them out again. We may decide not to come, especially when the islamofascists in their midst become the majorities in their countries and decide that morality is not the way they see it, and heads really will roll if you don't join the bandwagon. Pussies - all of them!

Posted by: JEM at November 6, 2004 at 01:43 PM

"What in hell does a person think not wearing pants is going to do besides convince others he's an idiot?"

Ever heard a saying that the person wearing the pants in the family is the one supporting the family (money and control). Maybe he's not wearing the pants because he isn't supporting this Country. Who knows...he's just some punk being supported by his parents I expect. When he grows up the issues will be more clear to him we hope.

Voting should start at 21-25 when people start learning the issues in life that matter. Mourning to him is losing a girlfriend....or boyfriend (significant other) in his case.

Posted by: tej at November 6, 2004 at 01:51 PM

"someone needs to explain to the Guardianistas that they should steer well clear of Texas, Bush's home state...there's a little thing called "Concealed Carry" down here. The Guardianista may just well get far enough to slap someone, but the victim will have the last word...I guar-OHNtee!"

Nooooooo..........send them down. Wifes a Brit- she's LOVE to show what shes learned about firearms, and the dogs need something to play with; and me- hell, I'll show em the Alamo. Give em a crash course in CAJONES.

Posted by: Roo at November 6, 2004 at 02:14 PM

Andrea,

unlike the rest of this blarg whcih is of course the product of bright minds in full creative flow

Posted by: wbatman at November 6, 2004 at 03:36 PM

There may be more Bush voters than people in Britain, but the winning majority of Bush alone is greater than the entire population of New Zealand.

And for those who want to get out of the US, we don't want any Kerry supporters in NZ - we have an election next year.

Posted by: dave at November 6, 2004 at 03:42 PM

Hey! Riley Sweeney is celebrating the Bush win the same way Bill Clinton celebrated his own win.

Next time mortgage rates go down: Bare Ass City for me.

Posted by: timks at November 6, 2004 at 05:16 PM

Any Brit (or anyone else, for that matter) who gets a mind to come physically assault me had best be able to run in excess of 3250 ft/sec.

Posted by: alfadog at November 6, 2004 at 06:41 PM

A bullet proof vest,not an electronic device????
I know of a certain harbour bridge for sale,really cheap.........

Posted by: marklatham at November 6, 2004 at 10:25 PM

Ahh, and it was only a couple of weeks ago when wbatman was (incompetently) posing as a disgruntled conservative. What's wrong, not up to the Moby act anymore now that your guy has lost?

Posted by: PW at November 6, 2004 at 10:30 PM

And as for marklatham: I'm sure you know such a bridge - you sound like the kinda guy who would have bought it in the first place. Having trouble getting rid of it again?

Posted by: PW at November 6, 2004 at 10:32 PM

How much for the bridge Marklatham? About the amount of capital you have built with the Australian people.If so it would be going real cheap.

Posted by: gubbaboy at November 6, 2004 at 10:58 PM

marklatham has a point - doesn't he always.

It's like the crushing of dissent and the Mike Moore thing. We all know Bush McHitler had him "silenced" months ago. I mean, really, who was fooled by that fly-blown corpse they wheeled out periodically?

Posted by: Dave at November 6, 2004 at 11:22 PM

And not to pick on marklatham.....aw, hell, why not?

markie, if you look closely at my posting, you will see that when I use a comma, like this, I insert a space right after the comma.

Watch closely: , , , , ,

But not this: ,,,,,,,,,

Putting a space after a comma makes you look less stupid and/or ignorant. Not that you would be less stupid and/or ignorant, but lefties do prefer form over function, after all. So you would be well within your operating instructions.

Posted by: The Real JeffS at November 7, 2004 at 12:57 AM

"unlike the rest of this blarg whcih is of course the product of bright minds in full creative flow"

Wbatshit would be more impressive if he bothered to spellcheck and use correct punctuation. Well okay, not more "impressive," but he might actually get a smidgen of respect for his views, such as they are.

Posted by: Andrea Harris at November 7, 2004 at 01:33 AM

Western Washington University, eh? I lived in the Bellingham area when it was a state college. Nice to see things haven't changed much since then [/sarcasm].

I hope that 18 year student gets a cold northeast wind up his arse!

Going pantless in Bellingham in November? Sounds like Mr. Sweeney isn't from around here, the locals all know that's a really bad idea. Canada's primary export to the US at this time of the year is arctic air, in massive quantities. If he doesn't put 'em on, the guy *will* experience frostbite of the nuts by new year.

Posted by: rosignol at November 7, 2004 at 07:38 AM

Guardian readers are the biggest losers around. They fancy themselves as intellectuals but are, in reality, snobs who shit themselves if they hear a trace of a working class accent. They hate the working class and the lower middle class, they really do. I once heard one of them dismiss somebody's views as 'working class Labour'. When I'm on my way to work in the morning, I can always identify them at the bus stop or on the bus, they are so laughable My boss is one, but unfortunately she has not beenin since the election (I believe she has been in London where she will find more anti-Bush people to sympathise with her than in Liverpool) so I have not been able to observe her rage at close quarters.

Posted by: Craig at November 7, 2004 at 07:50 AM

rosignol, I remember those nor'easters! Man, were they ever COLD!

That WWU students had better be careful, or his gnads are going fall on the pavement and shatter. If he ever had a pair to begin with.

Posted by: The Real JeffS at November 7, 2004 at 12:16 PM

this thread is like one of those frat parties when suddenly it's three o clock and all the good looking girls have gone off with chads or are too drunk to f*ck.

Posted by: tug at November 7, 2004 at 09:20 PM

Andrea,

Sorry, but I thought blatant illiteracy was something the orc community celebrated.

Posted by: wbatman at November 7, 2004 at 09:27 PM

"this thread is like one of those frat parties when suddenly it's three o clock and all the good looking girls have gone off with chads or are too drunk to f*ck."

Well, it is now that you're here, tug.

"Sorry, but I thought blatant illiteracy was something the orc community celebrated."

Well, you would know.

Posted by: Andrea Harris at November 8, 2004 at 12:48 PM

'CAn we just start nuking things'

I agree Jem . Bring on the rapture. We all know who'll be saved

Posted by: mrdobleigh at November 9, 2004 at 06:05 AM

All of these responses from "red states" are very telling...someone disagrees with you, wants to shake you into seeing reality and your response is to threaten to shoot them. And a note to all those Texans responding...at least I can breathe in my state. My children can play outside every day. My niece lives in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area and my sister needs to check the air quality color to see whether she can let my niece play outside that day. The schools cannot let the children play outside on some days because the air quality is so bad. And who do you have to thank for that? George W. Bush. As governor, Texas had the worst pollution record in the US. It is one of the most polluted states. So, keep your guns - you may need them to end your suffering one day.

Posted by: Lisa Greco at November 10, 2004 at 03:34 AM

I'm not even going to bother arguing you out of your delusions of persecution and superiority, Ms. Greco. It must suck to be you. As for your sister, if the air quality is so bad that her child's health is in danger, instead of sitting around complaining that George Bush the Mean Dragon made the bad smokes, maybe your sister should move to some place that is healthier for her child. If she doesn't do so then I am forced to conclude that she considers something more important than the life of her child, though I am sure I can't think what it could be. Can you?

Posted by: Andrea Harris at November 10, 2004 at 12:17 PM