June 04, 2004

IMAM'S PARADOX

QUESTION: I would like to know, is it allowed for a wife to suck her husbands private parts if he is wearing a flavoured condom?

ANSWER: It is permissible as long as it does not constitute oral sex.

And Allah Ta'ala Knows Best!

Posted by Tim Blair at June 4, 2004 06:26 PM
Comments

This inquiry is made by "Jazakallah" which is Arabic for "Hillary." Substitute "Monica" for "wife" and it make much more sense.

Posted by: perfectsense at June 4, 2004 at 06:38 PM

Thanks for that - the funniest thing I've seen all week!

Posted by: Mr T at June 4, 2004 at 07:09 PM

Depends on what the meaning of 'Islam' is lamb.

Posted by: CurrencyLad at June 4, 2004 at 07:53 PM

It's okay if she's just, uhhh...cleaning off the flavoured condom, I guess.

Posted by: Sean M. at June 4, 2004 at 08:11 PM

Is oral sex a Democrat thing, perfectsense?
*snickers at what some people are missing out on*

Posted by: MM at June 4, 2004 at 09:03 PM

is bill clinton an imam now?

Posted by: Mr. Bingley at June 4, 2004 at 10:11 PM

At last a vindication of Bill Clinton.

Posted by: T.R. at June 4, 2004 at 10:38 PM

Is the flavouring Helal?

Posted by: Habib at June 4, 2004 at 11:59 PM

Is it OK if the condom is bacon flavor?

Posted by: Latino at June 5, 2004 at 01:22 AM

Allah Ta'ala bo-b'ala
Banana-fana-fo-f'ala

You know I'm going to keep doing this, don't you?

Posted by: Ken Summers at June 5, 2004 at 01:25 AM

Iraqi police are holding an aide to Zarqawi.

Posted by: aaron at June 5, 2004 at 01:26 AM

How much can we expect from a people too dumb to take the wrapper off their fast food?

Posted by: richard mcenroe at June 5, 2004 at 01:42 AM

But it doesn't say who asked the question, the husband of the wife (or the 2nd wife or the 3rd or whatever).

Posted by: ras at June 5, 2004 at 03:37 AM

How can she suck it if she has a veil over her face? Take off the veil? But then she would be a sinner! Allah would be furious! He should just blow himself up on a bus somewhere so he can have 72 virgins that will do it without the condom....for all eternity!

Posted by: Oktober at June 5, 2004 at 03:39 AM

So he disapproved of the practice before he approved it?

Posted by: Steve in Houston at June 5, 2004 at 04:08 AM

Alas we may never know if an extra large condom will suffice as an emergency veil.

Posted by: Brent at June 5, 2004 at 05:27 AM

This is hilarious. It depends on what the meaning of oral sex is. Does this mean she can suck but he can't move? ROFLMAO!!!

Posted by: Helen at June 5, 2004 at 07:20 AM

Helen, you do realize that you just channeled Bill Clinton, don't you?

You might want to get exorcised.

Posted by: The Real JeffS at June 5, 2004 at 07:25 AM

And don't miss one of the world's funniest navigation buttons on the right-hand side of the page: "View random fatwa".

Posted by: PapayaSF at June 5, 2004 at 09:11 AM