March 30, 2004
ROBERT'S IRAQ ADVENTURES, CONTINUED
Robert Fisk reports, in his fashion:
Exactly a year after the Anglo-American armies invaded Iraq, I found five young men some days ago busy smashing up what was left of a Saddam statue in this little dusty border village. The torso and head of the dictator had long disappeared from his plinth at the frontier station but his legs and one arm and a battery of monumental missiles still lay on the ground in gleaming steel. Two American attack helicopters were racing up the border - still trying to find Donald Rumsfeld's Al Qaeda hordes as they supposedly swarm into Iraq - but what caught my eye were the heads of the five young men so assiduously hammering and sawing and hacking at the remains of Saddam's statue. Four of them were wearing black face masks, the fifth had a black hood over his head.
A year after we overthrew Saddam, Iraqis now have to hide their identity when they attack his image. What does that tell us about "new Iraq"?
What does it tell you about old Iraq that Saddam’s image was never attacked at all? (Another question for Fisk: if these anti-Saddam youngsters were so scared of reprisals, why were they “assiduously hammering and sawing and hacking” at an already-destroyed statue, in broad daylight, masks or not?)
If you are in Iraq, in Baghdad, driving its dangerous roads, the evidence of collapse and failure is everywhere ...When I drive these highways I now wear a "kuffiah" and "thobe" on my head. My driver wears Western trousers and shirt but I am in Arab clothes to avoid being attacked ... What does that tell us about Iraq a year after its "liberation"?
It tells us that Robert Fisk is the guy in the kuffiah and thobe riding alongside someone wearing Western trousers and shirt.
How do we explain now the armies of truculent, often ill-disciplined mercenaries now roaming Iraq on behalf of the Anglo-American occupation authorities? Many thousands of them British, some are well-trained, many are not ... When I pleaded with one British gunman in sunglasses last week to at least put a shirt over his gun to conceal it when walking in and out of our hotel, he pointed a finger at me.
"Listen mate," he shouted. "If I see someone with a gun come to shoot you, I am going to walk right past and do nothing."
Bet he was among the well-trained ones.
Posted by Tim Blair at March 30, 2004 02:04 AMSomebody buy that last guy a beer, and send me the bill! (wiping eyes) People like that just warm my heart.
Posted by: EGC at March 30, 2004 at 02:10 AMAh the Idea of Fisky wearing 'native' clothes! I bet when he visits France he wears a striped jumper, a beret and carries a baguette,and in Germany he puts on his lederhosen.
Does anyone remember what he was wearing when he last got duffed up?
Posted by: Ross at March 30, 2004 at 02:16 AMUnder Saddam, the trains ran on time. We got you already, oh boy do we have you. Now go to hell with the other fascist sympathizers and quislings, Fisk.
Posted by: Mike G at March 30, 2004 at 03:11 AMFinally someone with the correct value of Robert Fisk.
Fisk, the UK's answer to Geraldo. There he is riding around "incognito" next to his driver in western clothes. And the people are supposed to think is is just another Iraqi? Could this guy be any more of a buffoon.
Posted by: capt joe at March 30, 2004 at 03:13 AMThis guy is too funny for words.
"Quick! Cover up that gun! Someone might be scared!"
What the hell? Does he think the Fedayeen only shoot at armed people?
I like him hiding in pseudo-arabic clothes though. Reminds me of Peter Sellars in the Pink Panther movies. The one where he inflates his hunchback with helium? Definately Fisk.
Posted by: Posse Incitatus at March 30, 2004 at 03:16 AMSomeone tell John Malkovich to get to Baghdad ASAP!!
Posted by: Gazaridis at March 30, 2004 at 03:51 AMWhat the hell? And here I'd always been under the impression that if you want to blend in, you should try dressing like the natives you see around you. If they're wearing western clothes, then why not imitate them? I'll bet this guy sticks out like someone in Moscow wearing full Russian-peasant regalia instead of the usual low-rent Matrix refugee look.
Gotta love his "pleading" with the mercenary. 'Cause obviously he knows the guy's job so much better than the actual guy himself ever could.
Posted by: Sonetka at March 30, 2004 at 04:40 AMI knew there was a reason I liked John Malkovich...
Posted by: John Nowak at March 30, 2004 at 04:52 AMA year after we overthrew Saddam, Iraqis now have to hide their identity when they attack his image. What does that tell us about "new Iraq"?
It tells us that proper safety goggles are very hard to find.
(And who's this "we", white man?)
My driver wears Western trousers and shirt but I am in Arab clothes to avoid being attacked ... What does that tell us about Iraq a year after its "liberation"?
It tells us that Fisk wants to be Lawrence of flippin' Arabia in the worst possible way. And that he probably wouldn't mind another beating. Oh, just a little one. Please?
Posted by: Angie Schultz at March 30, 2004 at 05:05 AM"When I pleaded with one British gunman in sunglasses last week to at least put a shirt over his gun to conceal it when walking in and out of our hotel"
What a pathetic bastard.
Posted by: madne0 at March 30, 2004 at 05:06 AMChrist, an educated Iraqi who was aware of Fisk's writings (a Salam Pax for example) would pop the bastard one in the head with an AK if he could.
Posted by: David Gillies at March 30, 2004 at 05:44 AMDo you think he wears a suicide bomb-belt as part of his 'arab' dress?
Posted by: Ross at March 30, 2004 at 05:44 AMMy driver wears Western trousers and shirt but I am in Arab clothes to avoid being attacked... What does that tell us about Iraq a year after its "liberation"?It tells me they know who you are, Bobby. Posted by: Spiny Norman at March 30, 2004 at 05:59 AM
Yep, put a shirt over the gun to make it impossible to use fast, if needed. Well thought out.
Shame the pom didn't shoot him.
Posted by: Harry Tuttle at March 30, 2004 at 07:49 AM"Truculent" mercenaries, oh dear.
That last bit sounds like a Fisk con job to me. I'd be willing to bet the "gunman" he "pleaded" with ignored the stupid twit altogether.
Unfortunately. Should've beaten his ass...
Posted by: mojo at March 30, 2004 at 08:48 AMMy driver wears Western trousers and shirt but I am in Arab clothes to avoid being attacked ... What does that tell us about Iraq a year after its "liberation"?
It tells us that you want them to beat up your driver this time, not you.
Posted by: Meryl Yourish at March 30, 2004 at 09:30 AMFisk already got beaten by a bunch of afghani refugees a couple of years ago, and he's *still* running around being a complete twit.
IMO, the Brit merc had the right idea. Let natural selection deal with him.
Posted by: rosignol at March 30, 2004 at 09:32 AMMy driver wears Western trousers and shirt but I am in Arab clothes to avoid being attacked
Heh. Did this remind anyone else of Thompson and Thomson's disguises from the Tintin books? The bumbling incompetent part fits.
Posted by: Crispytoast at March 30, 2004 at 09:54 AM"Four of them were wearing black face masks"...Well you wouldn't want to be identified in the company of Fisk, would you?
Posted by: slatts at March 30, 2004 at 11:20 AMWhy should the truculent British merc do anything to protect Fisk? I mean, if anyone shoots him it's because Fisk deserved it, after all. Fisk will smile as the gunman puts the barrel to the back of his head and say "I totally understand why you're doing this, I'd do it too if I were---"
Posted by: Sortelli at March 30, 2004 at 11:38 AM"My driver wears Western trousers and shirt but I am in Arab clothes to avoid being attacked"
Arab clothes?
Bullshit! we know you're really wearing your Baath khaki's and a mo'
They have to wait until the swamp is drained of all the 'noble resistence fighters' before they feel safe showing their faces.
The 'noble resistence fighters' some of the slime in the West are hoping will 'liberate' the Iraqis from their 'invaders'.
Posted by: Chris Josephson at March 30, 2004 at 12:33 PM"Does anyone remember what he was wearing when he last got duffed up?"
I hear he wears a koala suit and carries a bucket when in Australia.
Posted by: Craig Mc at March 30, 2004 at 02:47 PMWhen I pleaded with one British gunman in sunglasses last week to at least put a shirt over his gun to conceal it when walking in and out of our hotel, he pointed a finger at me.
He sounds like one hell of a pussy.