December 27, 2003


James Lileks has helpful New Year resolutions for Bush-haters:

I resolve to consider that not everything Bush says is a lie. Example: If Bush says that "two plus two equals four," I will not spit, "Oh, that's Enron math," and spend the rest of the day rebalancing my checkbook in Base Eight.

Likewise: I resolve to entertain the idea that he has his own ideas. He is not motivated by a Halliburton-built ankle bracelet that delivers powerful shocks when he strays from the Zionist-Oilman agenda.

I resolve to grasp the absurdity of appearing on national talk shows to insist that our freedom of speech has disappeared.

I resolve, as a purely abstract philosophical matter, to consider the possibility that France may not have America's best interests as the guiding principle of its foreign policy.

UPDATE. Democratic Underground ponders Bush’s involvement in the Iranian earthquake. Well, after pulling off that plastic turkey stunt, I wouldn't put it past him.

Posted by Tim Blair at December 27, 2003 05:56 PM

Two plus two is still four in base eight. You'd need to use base three or base four to get anything else.

Also: Bush did not cause the earthquake in Iran. Or if he did, the targeting needs some work.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at December 27, 2003 at 09:33 PM

I have to admit that I've become somewhat addicted to reading the DU on a daily basis. It gives me a warm "there but for the grace of God go I" feeling. It's kind of like a visit to the zoo where you can see the strange exotic creatures from a distance without getting close enough for them to throw their scat at you.

Posted by: Randal Robinson at December 28, 2003 at 12:49 AM

Maybe the plastic turkey really had a GPS receiver built into it, so Bush could get a baseline location and extrapolate the target position so Ming the Merciless could use his earthquake ray like in the beginning of Flash Gordon?

It all fits together now...

Posted by: John Nowak at December 28, 2003 at 02:17 AM

More seriously, I'm more disturbed by the fact that nobody at DU has popped in yet with "Do you have any idea how fucking stupid this thread makes us look?" That appeared pretty quickly after the the "Death to American Soldiers" post.

Posted by: John Nowak at December 28, 2003 at 02:29 AM

You fools. It wasn't Bush. It was Karl Rove.

Posted by: Natalie at December 28, 2003 at 03:32 AM

Tim - Randall's comment about going to the zoo must be put in the file for next year's best quotes ... and it's still 2003!

Posted by: Bill at December 28, 2003 at 03:39 AM

It wasn't Bush. It was the rabbits.

Posted by: Donnah at December 28, 2003 at 04:47 AM

You know we really shouldn't be surprised about the stuff on the Demorcratic Underground sites etc....

Figure that there are 300,000,000 people in the US. Lets assume that say 1/1000th of % are thick as a plank....

That is 1000 people, if 1/2 of those people have PC's and net access then you have 500 people which is a big pool of idiots available to validate themselves.

This is the difference between today and 20 years ago. Years ago such a fool was simply a comical fellow that would rave at the local pub or an odd uncle that you laughed at or with at the family Christmas party.

Now these people are networked and validating each other.

Posted by: P. Ingemi at December 28, 2003 at 05:23 AM

Changing the base from ten to much less was the first thing I thought of but, really, when it’s time to talk turkey, “10” in Base 4 is really just “four,” & “20,” “two fours,” & so on. “20” in Base 12: “two dozen.”

Modular number systems produce more striking impresions. In Mod 3, 2+2 = 1. In Mod 4, 2+2 = 0.

Posted by: ForNow at December 28, 2003 at 05:43 AM

Patrick reads the thread in question.


Okay, there are a few people who are scoffing, but some of the others look like they're serious. Whatever they have... is it contagious? O_O;;

Posted by: Patrick Chester at December 28, 2003 at 11:13 AM

Give Bush some credit; he walks pretty well with those cloven hoofs.

Posted by: gaz at December 28, 2003 at 12:37 PM

Earthquake? Come on. I mean, I could see flood, or tornado, but an earthquake might disturb those precious, precious oil reserves...

Posted by: Jerry at December 28, 2003 at 03:50 PM

If no-one was hurt, it'd be as funny as the stuff about anti-gravity US technology. But as it is ... it's just sad.

Posted by: Andjam at December 28, 2003 at 10:04 PM