December 05, 2003

WHO'S THE TURKEY NOW?

The Sydney Morning Herald is, having bought into the Washington Post’s Turkeygate story. So has a turkey-crazed media flock. This scandal has legs -- and wings:

The Independent reports (under the headline "Turkey stunt comes back to haunt Bush") that "once again the White House stands accused of embellishing incidents for electoral gain". And once again The Independent stands accused of embellishing incidents for the sake of attacking Bush.

The Guardian’s elite investigative unit reveals: "The president never took a knife to the bird he held for the cameras. It may not even have been edible." Get working on that script, Oliver Stone.

The Age says "the foray has opened new credibility questions". At least that’s the opinion of "Washington", The Age’s enigmatically-named reporter.

AFP declares the ornamental bird to be "another disclosure embarrassing the White House".

The media should be embarrassed, not the White House. This "scandal" is not only sub-trivial and indicative of a fixed anti-Bush mindset, it’s also flat-out wrong, as an Instapundit reader of military background points out:

This turkey business is ludicrous. I've eaten in mess halls at Thanksgiving over the course of my nine years in the Army and I have always seen a fancy turkey that was for display and not for consumption. Like the cornucopias and every other festive trimming, the "show turkey" is a routine part of the presentation for the soldiers eating in the mess hall. When I saw this article on Drudge Report last night, I nearly choked. In the midst of everything important that is going, the fact that people find this newsworthy is simply stunning in its absurdity.

Turkeys.

UPDATE. Unbelievably, soldiers ignored the entire gobbler conspiracy:

Then, from behind the camouflage netting, the President of the United States came around. The mess hall actually erupted with hollering. Troops bounded to their feet with shocked smiles and just began cheering with all their hearts. The building actually shook. It was just unreal. I was absolutely stunned. Not only for the obvious, but also because I was only two tables away from the podium. There he stood, less than thirty feet away from me! The cheering went on and on and on.

Soldiers were hollering, cheering, and a lot of them were crying. There was not a dry eye at my table. When he stepped up to the cheering, I could clearly see tears running down his cheeks ... Here was this man, our President, came all the way around the world, spending 17 hours on an airplane and landing in the most dangerous airport in the world, where a plane was shot out of the sky not six days before.

Over at Democrats.org they’re linking the turkey to Haliburton. Seriously. Deep Giblet, in comments, is way ahead of them:

Ask yourself this: Why was the turkey killed? How was it roasted? Who had the recipe? Who?

Posted by Tim Blair at December 5, 2003 01:44 PM
Comments

Stop it Tim!! Oh please make it stop, I can barely breathe hahahahaha!! This will bring down the president hahahaha!! Turkey-gate hahahaha!! I am sorry but hahahaha!!

Posted by: Rob at December 5, 2003 at 01:53 PM

"Although the pictures may have given the impression that the president himself had helped serve the traditional holiday meal, the troops were served buffet-style as in any normal military canteen."

But he DID hep serve the meals, and that's exactly what the television footage showed us all last week. Bush behind the counter servig up meat, veggies, gravy, etc.

Just wait 'til Christmas, everyone. GW had better be careful he doesn't stand next to any Christmas trees that aren't 100% real.

He'd better watch out for any immitation Faberge Eggs next Easter as well.

Richard.

Posted by: Richard at December 5, 2003 at 02:00 PM

Well, if it was only a plastic turkey, Bush should have a lock on that all-important PETA endorsement.

Posted by: R.W. at December 5, 2003 at 02:02 PM

There are pictures here
and here of Bush serving turkey to the troops.

This "scandal" reaches new levels of lameness, even for the media.

Posted by: Randal Robinson at December 5, 2003 at 02:57 PM

This is the same media that has never told us about the 150 starving kids in a Saddam concentration camp that the US soldiers rescued.

Why were the kids there? How many survived after being rescued. How are the parents doing? We know nothing about those kids but we know way too much about one dead turkey.

Posted by: jake at December 5, 2003 at 02:58 PM

But don't you see, the ornamental turkey is symbolic of a deeper... a deeper... where'd my medicine go... they don't make blankets like they used to... what was I saying?

Posted by: Mike G at December 5, 2003 at 03:03 PM

It could have been worse. With the SMH's usual inaccurate, plagaristic standard of journalism, we could have a headline "Bush beats the drumsticks of war!"

Posted by: Greg at December 5, 2003 at 03:06 PM

There are pictures here
and here of Bush serving turkey to the troops

These images on Yahoo!! News are obviously photoshopped. It's a plastic head of the President on a fake body.

Posted by: Wallace at December 5, 2003 at 03:07 PM

There are pictures here
and here of Bush serving turkey to the troops

These images on Yahoo!! News are obviously photoshopped. It's a plastic head of the President on a fake body.

Posted by: Wallace at December 5, 2003 at 03:08 PM

The Washington Post story made it clear that it was a real turkey, just like this whole manufactured scandal.

Posted by: Angie Schultz at December 5, 2003 at 03:08 PM

This is too big for you, Tim. It's a mystery wrapped in a riddle stuffed in a turkey. Everybody was behind it: CIA, FBI, the Mob, Hormel... Look, I can't give you everything, not even seconds. Just follow the gravy.

Posted by: Deep Giblet at December 5, 2003 at 03:16 PM

Anyone for grassy-knoll?

Posted by: Razor at December 5, 2003 at 03:49 PM

OK, I guess I can give you some background, Tim. I worked in the Pentagon in black ops, doing the catering. (In Vietnam I worked in Operation Candied Yam, developing an electric carving knife.) I was sent to the South Pole by General Y, and was in New Zealand on my way back when I heard the news. Why was I, the chief of Special Cooks sent there? The local 112th Cooks was ordered to stand down. It is standard procedure to supplement the Secret Service by preparing the fixins. We never would have let a cardboard pumpkin come that close to the corn. Never would have let the President try and lift the turkey himself, never! We would have had our own basters covering the area. Ask yourself this: Why was the turkey killed? How was it roasted? Who had the recipe? Who?

Posted by: Deep Giblet at December 5, 2003 at 03:53 PM

"It's a mystery wrapped in a riddle stuffed in a turkey"

LMAO Giblet. Great stuff.

Posted by: Joe Geoghegan at December 5, 2003 at 04:59 PM

Here's another scandal for the president. Good thing the Washington Press Corp was there to let the world know about the shameful incident.

Posted by: Lee at December 5, 2003 at 06:37 PM

Look at the footage. Look carfully. If you freeze the frame just as Bush sets the turkey down you can make out a shape one hundred meters to the right on a grassy gnoll. It's blurry but there's no mistaking it my friends, it's a second turkey.

Posted by: Amos at December 5, 2003 at 10:52 PM

hmm, a plastic turkey...so it really is all about oil...

Posted by: Mr. Bingley at December 5, 2003 at 10:55 PM

ROFL, Deep Giblet. That was so funny I just had to blog it.

Posted by: Randal Robinson at December 6, 2003 at 12:38 AM

LOL@Giblet
You just made my day :D

Posted by: madne0 at December 6, 2003 at 02:24 AM


Agreed 100% - the media had no business covering a public-relations stunt as if it was some sort of real news. But then, the White House had no
business attempting to create a news story for the purpose of aiding a partisan re-election campaign either. If the adminitration wanted TV coverage of Bush and the bird, the RNC should have paid for ads.

Posted by: Lassiter Jones at December 6, 2003 at 02:28 AM

The way I see it this photo must have been the result of a triangulation of crossfire. Notice how some of the soldiers' attention is being diverted by a photographer to the rear right of the President while others spot a camera to the rear left. Meanwhile, the fatal shot, the one that appeared in news stories around the world, came from the front as the President's head moves back and to the left. Back and to the left. Back and to the left.

Posted by: Randal Robinson at December 6, 2003 at 02:35 AM

The only fake turkey there at the time the GWB was is Hillary.

Posted by: noah at December 6, 2003 at 02:36 AM

the White House had no business attempting to create a news story for the purpose of aiding a partisan re-election campaign either

Agreed, Lassiter. The White House staff should all go into seclusion and make no effort whatsoever that could in any way, directly or indirectly, intentionally or only incidentally, help to re-elect the President. No more public bill-signings. No more visits with the troops. No White House Christmas tree. No announcements, in fact, of any kind, in case someone might approve of whatever is being announced and feel moved to vote for Bush.

In fact, Bush should be sequestered in the White House and not allowed to engage in any activity unless it damages his chances for reelection.

Posted by: R. C. Dean at December 6, 2003 at 03:30 AM

What the hell? Are all these news people on crack? Sheesh.

Posted by: Harry at December 6, 2003 at 05:43 AM

R.C.

Excellent!
Perhaps Bush should be forced to hang out with Cheney at some undisclosed location until the Dems win.

Posted by: nobody important at December 6, 2003 at 05:56 AM

Lassiter, I would ask you to imagine the screaming that would have ensued had Bush excluded all reporters from the trip. As it is, the NYT has been furrowing its brow and various journalistic mavens have been making dark noises about the White House's "unethical behavior" and "deception" in taking so few.

And as for the "re-election campaign" business - are you seriously suggesting this story has no meaning other than in the context of next year's election? If the election weren't in question - say, if this were Bush's second term so we knew he wouldn't be running next year - would the WH have behaved any differently? Would the press have ignored the story? I don't think so.

Posted by: jeanne a e devoto at December 6, 2003 at 07:10 AM

Ask yourself this: Why was the turkey killed? How was it roasted? Who had the recipe? Who?

Who?

WHO?

WHO BLOWED UP DA OWL?
(ref: Amiri Baraka--read the following link if you don't understand--mind you, he is supposed to be a poet laureate in New Jersey)
http://www.bet.com/articles/0,1048,c3gb4059-4747-1,00.html


cheshirecat

Posted by: cheshirecat at December 6, 2003 at 02:26 PM

I'm sorry, turkeys just don't grow that big. That bird has been genetically modified as part of a secret Haliburton psy-ops scam. Turkey-gate must have been in the planning for months, possibly years.

American voters will not forget Thanksgiving Day 2003. Bush lied, turkeys died!

TFK

Posted by: Bob Bunnett at December 6, 2003 at 02:54 PM

Re: the supposed poet: I think he is like the emperor without any clothes. Do people pay for such stuff? Think they already have all the swamp land in Florida they can use? :-)

Posted by: Thom at December 7, 2003 at 03:00 AM

Yes the turkey was fake, much like the last presidential election=fake democracy. Everything about this pRESIDENT of the white house is fake. No wonder he thinks democracy is something you can impose on a people with a gun.

Posted by: john conner at December 9, 2003 at 10:58 AM

The real scandal is yet to break. President Bush does not have his food handler's permit.

'Food handler gate' ???

Neither is he wearing sanitary gloves.

'Glove - gate' ???

This one may have wings as Americans have a g-love g'ate division regarding Mr. Bush.

Posted by: Jericho at December 9, 2003 at 05:27 PM

There is also a growing indication that Mr. Bush did not wash-up before serving the troops leading to the latest scandal dubbed, water-gate.

Posted by: Jericho at December 9, 2003 at 05:29 PM

The turkey was a fake. And so are all these so called Bush supporters in this blog. I'll bet these "bloggers" are probably just one little shmuck hired by the Bushies to fill up blog sites with pro-Bush propaganda and appear to be many, many people supporting our Turkey in Chief. Pul-leeze. The bull-shit smell coming from the White House is so bad, it's getting hilarious to listen to anyone trying to defend it.

Posted by: Dallas at December 10, 2003 at 04:08 AM