December 02, 2003

E-CARDS FROM A RE-TARD

Have you received a Dennis Kucinich e-card yet? They’re beautiful! And meaningful!

Like this one, with Dennis's words on it: “The Light of Freedom cannot be extinguished as long as it is inside of us.” That’s because our skin, organs, and skeletons protect the Light of Freedom from the Breeze of Injustice. Of course, shoving the Light of Freedom up inside of ourselves can be traumatic, but liberty demands sacrifice, you know?

Maybe you want to send this to a friend: “May all beings be well. May all beings be happy. Peace. Peace. Peace.” If all beings are well, however, it’s gonna be tough for those beings that live off of the flesh of dead beings. What is the hungry snow crab to do with no rotten fish to munch? And can non-sentient beings be happy?

I guess Dennis looks cheerful enough. And so would you be too, if you’d discovered the world’s only vegetarian eagle! No unhappy field mice for him today. Peace peace peace, Dennis. I hope you find love.

Posted by Tim Blair at December 2, 2003 04:10 PM
Comments

Omygod! And I thought Mad Mouth Mark was a flake.

Posted by: James Riley at December 2, 2003 at 04:51 PM

Gentlemen may cry, Peace, Peace-- but there is no peace. The war is actually begun! The next gale that sweeps from the north will bring to our ears the clash of resounding arms! Our brethren are already in the field! Why stand we here idle? What is it that gentlemen wish? What would they have? Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death! - P. Henry

Posted by: Andrew at December 2, 2003 at 05:08 PM

Thanks Tim. That picture of the light coming out of the heart just put me off dinner. It looks like it has just devoured some poor blonde intern or something yech!!!!

Posted by: Rob at December 2, 2003 at 05:17 PM

that Kuchinic fellow looks like Alfred E Neuman.

Posted by: roscoe at December 2, 2003 at 06:16 PM

Say, how did he get that light in there?

? Someone should tell Denice that the Care Bears set isn't old enough to vote.

Wait a minute. What is this little nugget tucked away in the Care Bear google side pocket?

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear are You? it's a quiz.

and The Care Bears Quiz i don't have a clue!

Posted by: papertiger at December 2, 2003 at 06:27 PM

"Democratic presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich hasn't found love yet on the campaign trail. Then again, with his eye on the White House, he said Sunday he hasn't had much time for matchmaking."

I wouldn't worry if I were him. Plenty of Democrat Presidents have found love in the White House. Or at least lovin'.

Posted by: Andrew D. at December 2, 2003 at 07:08 PM

"They tell us, sir, that we are weak; unable to cope with so formidable an adversary. But when shall we be stronger? Will it be the next week, or the next year? ... Shall we gather strength but irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?" Patrick Henry

Posted by: perfectsense at December 2, 2003 at 07:25 PM

If you visit "A Small Victory" you will find a wonderful illustration of Dennis Kucinich's plan for combatting terrorism and ensuring international peace for the next millenium. I promise if you go there, you will not be disappointed.

God blessed us with Dennis- let us not waste his gifts.

Posted by: Jon Black at December 2, 2003 at 08:50 PM

Your subject heading is an unfair slur on retards.

Posted by: Andjam at December 2, 2003 at 09:13 PM

P. Henry?? I thought that was Aragorn. Fucking orcs

Posted by: Amos at December 2, 2003 at 10:16 PM

That Light of Freedom would come in handy when I'm working under the sink.

Posted by: JohnO at December 2, 2003 at 11:13 PM

Dennis' "Planet Hearth" e-card will give me nightmares for years.

Posted by: Bud Norton at December 3, 2003 at 12:00 AM

Am I the only one who thinks Dennis Kucinich looks like some UFO cult leader who'd ask you to cut off your balls, eat cyanide and join him on the mother ship? These e-mail postcards only reinforce this impression.

That is one creepy looking freak.

Posted by: E.A. at December 3, 2003 at 01:46 AM

It's not as bad as his first choice for an e-card:

http://image.pathfinder.com/time/reports/cult/images/intro2.gif

Posted by: Donnah at December 3, 2003 at 02:53 AM

Patrick Henry rocks -- take a lesson. thats the way to agitate.

Go P. Henry

Posted by: papertiger at December 3, 2003 at 02:55 AM

I went to Kucinich website, viewed a postcard, and submitted the following feedback...
"I like your postcard "Love is stronger than fear". That's exactly what the Iraqis are saying now. Recent polls show that freed of the fear of Saddam they are now free to love. Congratulations"

Posted by: Joe at December 3, 2003 at 03:54 AM

"P. Henry?? I thought that was Aragorn. Fucking orcs"

Oh yeah? An you just better watch what you says about orcs, yup. At least we isn't wearin' 'No Blud fer oil' shirt, yes?

Besides Dennis has the endorsement of all the animals of the forest, you just ask Grandfather Twilight.HA

Posted by: grrshnahg at December 3, 2003 at 05:24 AM

Dennis' "Planet Hearth" e-card will give me nightmares for years.

It's the first one, "Trust the freakish half-alien baby", that'll keep me up at night.

Posted by: Brendan at December 3, 2003 at 07:43 AM

My God, is that crap sick-making or what? Have these people lived all their lives wrapped in cotton wool?

The "prayers for peace" one is uniquely delusional. The Gods of all religions are invoked to "continue" their wise "guidance" of Denis' actions. Sanctimonious dipshit.

TFK

Posted by: Bob Bunnett at December 3, 2003 at 08:32 AM

Jesus Christ...just Jesus Christ...

By the way, has anyone else noticed this little bit of irony: In the Grandfather Twilight endorsement (Yeah, bite that, Dean and the Teamsters, Kerry and the NEA...Kucinich has Grandfather Twilight), the picture of the crow squawking "Caucus! Caucus!" is right next to a section of the narrative that starts out "Whenever I hear Dennis speak..."

I actually like the little moonbat freak. Anyone who claims the cornerstone of Western Civilization is "Kielbasa, polka, and bowling" can't be all bad.

Posted by: Oregon Dan at December 3, 2003 at 10:32 AM

Gee, after he's been locked away in an institution....I'm gonna miss him...*sniff*...

Posted by: rc at December 3, 2003 at 01:03 PM

What happens when the light of peace is put where the sun don't shine?

Posted by: Gary Bezowsky at December 3, 2003 at 02:25 PM

I've heard enough about Dick Cheney's connections to Halliburton. Someone needs to look into Kucinich's connections to Hallmark.

Posted by: Paul Zrimsek at December 3, 2003 at 03:29 PM

What is wrong with people in Ohio anyway. Trafficant... Kucinich. I always thought that it was an exceedlingly normal, bland place.

Posted by: peter at December 4, 2003 at 07:53 AM

Snow crabs have to eat other creatures to survive; humans don't. Learning that Kucinich is a vegan has given me some respect for him.

Posted by: Senti at December 4, 2003 at 02:53 PM

Senti: vegetables are creatures too -- at the very least, they are alive. What's worse, they can't even run away. Imagine the helpless screams of the wheat-children as the combine mows them down, and know that you and Kucinich are murderers of the truly helpless! {Crazed stare.}

Posted by: Andrea Harris at December 6, 2003 at 12:45 PM