November 26, 2003

BUSH ADVENTURES

Those evil Bush boys. Whatever will they do next?

Street robberies in London soared by 20 per cent during US President George W Bush's state visit to Britain last week, as thousands of extra police officers ditched normal duties to help oversee an unprecedented security operation.

Personally, Id be more inclined to blame this on the robbers than on a state visit. Meanwhile Neil Bush proceeds with his interesting divorce:

He admitted in the deposition that he previously had sex with several other women while on trips to Thailand and Hong Kong at least five years ago.

The women, he said, simply knocked on the door of his hotel room, entered and engaged in sex with him.

He said he did not know if they were prostitutes because they never asked for money and he did not pay them.

"It was very unusual," Bush said.

Bill Clinton is reading about this somewhere and thinking to himself: Ah ... good times.

Posted by Tim Blair at November 26, 2003 04:35 PM
Comments

All our presidents have to have a looney-tunes younger brother. It's in the Constitution somewhere...

Posted by: Andrea Harris at November 26, 2003 at 09:45 PM

"No no no, I said f*** the Jews!" - James Baker.

Does this suggest that the Chinese government is indirectly trying to buy off the Bush family?

If this means both sides of American politics are in China's pocket, we're all screwed.

Posted by: Andjam at November 26, 2003 at 09:52 PM

This has actually happened to me in Beijing and Shanghai, at reputable hotels!!

I politely declined as my wife was in the room and probably wouldn't appreciate it.

Both times we were watching TV later at night.

Posted by: Dave at November 26, 2003 at 10:16 PM

jaaaaaaaaaaaayzus, this reads like a penthouse letter:

"all of a sudden, rich people offered to pay for some stuff i know (not entirely sure which stuff that is) & exotic girls began showing up @ my porch-step & begged my studly self to 'proceed pumping.'"

this is my cue to start begging somebody in the "bush junta" to adopt me...

Posted by: harm d. at November 26, 2003 at 11:02 PM

What was that old saying about a Bush in the bird?

Posted by: Ken Summers at November 26, 2003 at 11:58 PM

China really has gotten liberal with our conservatives.

Posted by: papertiger at November 27, 2003 at 12:09 AM

Dear God! I mean, they just show up at the hotel? Are they prostitutes? I mean, is it like hotel pr0n in America where it just shows up on the bill?

1.) Room...75$
2.) Room service...25$
3.) Serviced in your room...$300

Posted by: Gabe Posey at November 27, 2003 at 01:07 AM

Andrea pretty much nailed it.

Gabe: Assuming he's not just lying, what I'd guess happened is that his business partners sent some ladies over. Still, he really should have tipped them, or at least given them cab fare. Bad farang!

Posted by: Otter at November 27, 2003 at 01:15 AM

Sure, "Street robberies in London soared by 20 per cent during US President George W Bush's state visit" but what about the other opportunities that were opened up? Jeremy Dore of Coggeshall, Essex wrote this to the Guardian - "I intend to go to the demo next week. In a crowd of that size, there's bound to be a fair quantity of dropped change." (via stephenpollard.net)

Posted by: Softly at November 27, 2003 at 02:46 AM

Wow, i would never have found out about what's in the mass market press if i didn't rely on the crisis of confidence to cut and paste the best bits for me. I wonder if GWB logs in? Someone said he doesn't read the papers either, so maybe he already lurks here to get his dog whistle cues. He should start posting... it would be a much better way to "reach the people" over the head of the liberal media filter.

Posted by: Miranda Divide at November 27, 2003 at 05:36 AM

"Honest, yer honor. When she knocked on the door I thought she asked if I was looking for June Tang. I wasn't, but she's quite a vision so I let her in. What is so rare as a day in June, I asks ya."

Posted by: Carl H. at November 27, 2003 at 06:14 AM

What I said before about Miranda not being quite as worthless a troll as crock o' shite and perhaps not as worthy of banning? I take it back. Ban away.

Posted by: Big Dog at November 27, 2003 at 06:22 AM

you know, I often have women knocking on my door who come and have sex with me. Just like I think Miranda wants to with Tim. Come on, admit it Miranda, all this troll business is just an excuse to get close to him...reeal close.

Posted by: Quentin George at November 27, 2003 at 07:21 AM

I love that whole "Bush doesn't read the papers" bit.

"Mr. President; he is the morning intel roundup, including satellite intercepts and field reports from the theater -"

"Not now, dang it! I'm reading the Style section!"

Posted by: Lileks at November 27, 2003 at 07:42 AM

Yeah, "The Director of the CIA will have to wait! I'm reading Dowd!"

Posted by: scott h. at November 27, 2003 at 09:12 AM

The big Zionist/right-wing conspiracy has surveillance cameras and operations everywhere. There's no need to read the papers!

Posted by: Marty at November 27, 2003 at 09:44 AM

Street robberies increased? Oh, you mean those "street robberies" that are much less commonplace in the US on account of the second Amendment; all those war-mongering simpleton Yanks carrying guns to defend themselves from street thugs? Ok, Gotcha.

Posted by: TreeHuggingHippyCrap at November 27, 2003 at 10:49 AM

I like the idea of street robbery spiking because George sneaks out and does a little mugging befor his reception with the queen

SOCIALIST ALLIANCE GUY: No more war! Give us money

BUSH: Howabout YOU fork out for a change, you hippy dregs! Hand over the cash, you humanoid trash, don't make me hit you over the head with this aircraft carrier!

ALL: Oh no! George Bush!!!

AGING HIPPY: Well that's just the typical thuggish rhetoric I'd expect from the privaledged scion of entrenched corporate interests. We renounce all forms of capitalist exploitation and-

(Bush sighs and knees him in the groin)

AGING HIPPY: Agh!! Oh Jesus! I'm sorry, here take my wallet-

Bush: And your shoes!!

Posted by: Amos at November 27, 2003 at 11:44 AM

Sounds like a Frank J. post. I think after Bush robbed him, Rumsfeld would strangle him.

Posted by: Big Dog at November 27, 2003 at 01:22 PM

"Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system. Come and see the violence inherent in the system!"

Posted by: Ken Summers at November 27, 2003 at 01:22 PM

hmm, it does sound like frankJ. Maybe his emotive style sunk into my subconcious and I regurgitated it without knowing

I'm vaugely embarrased, like that time I was describing this totaly brilliant idea for three movie epic to a friend and suddenly realised it was just starwars redone with an all-ninja cast. Obviously not literally starwars with ninja flying X-wings etc, that would be fucking stupid

Posted by: Amos at November 27, 2003 at 03:22 PM

The next thing that Evil Bush got up to?? Took air force one for the ultimate road trip to Iraq - with Dr Rice in the back!!!! Oh man I wanna be president I wanna be pres!!!! Talk about perks!

Posted by: Rob at November 28, 2003 at 02:40 PM

Not a first offence for Bush brother. This guy was up to his neck in a v messy Savings & Loan (US equiv of building soc) collapse some years ago. Good to see such amazing business acumen runs in the family.

Posted by: wombat at November 30, 2003 at 03:34 PM

"I'm vaugely embarrased, like that time I was describing this totaly brilliant idea for three movie epic to a friend and suddenly realised it was just starwars redone with an all-ninja cast"

That also sounds like Frank J. Stop stealing his style.

Posted by: Greg at December 1, 2003 at 11:39 AM

I hope my brother gets elected president.

Posted by: Zach Everson at December 3, 2003 at 06:25 AM