July 03, 2003
STUPID WHITE BLOB
Look at the trouble Michael Moore gets into when he goes outside without his identifying Detroit Tigers cap.
Posted by Tim Blair at July 3, 2003 01:28 PMHere's how they could tell it was Michael Moore:
"The specimen was at first taken for a beached whale when it was washed up a week ago but experts who have seen it say it appears not to have a backbone."
He was also screaming "kill whitey!"
Posted by: Random_Prose at July 3, 2003 at 01:39 PMOr,
"The specimen was at first taken for a beached whale when it was washed up a week ago but experts who have seen it say it appears not to have a backbone.
They figure it might be a [blank] whale."
Where [blank] is whomever has recently pissed you off with their cowardice, backstabbing, or general spinelessness.
I'm going with "California Gray Davis whale".
Posted by: Tim Shell at July 3, 2003 at 02:14 PMBlablablabla
"Michael Moore is fat and has different political beliefs to us us". How trite.
Posted by: Rick Squane at July 3, 2003 at 02:44 PMNo, I'm fat.
Michael Moore, however, is a sad and sorry lying sack of shit.
Posted by: BruceT at July 3, 2003 at 02:47 PMJesus. I take a 5 minute nap on the beach and wake up to find the Chilean Navy poking at my bits.
Posted by: Michael Moore at July 3, 2003 at 03:26 PMBigwig says it's a giant whale penis.
No, I'm not kidding.
Alas, it turned out to be a giant octopus.
Posted by: Meryl Yourish at July 3, 2003 at 04:02 PMOoooohhh...In your face, Mike! He's like, a big whale!
Ohhhh man, if that doesn't force him to give back his oscar then what will?
Yeah, Meryl, that's what they say. But have you seen either Michael Moore or Senator Robert Kelly recently? I think the people deserve to be told, before we're engulfed in a hideous fight against mutant left-wing shapeshifters.
Posted by: David Gillies at July 3, 2003 at 04:52 PMwhat if it was a whale having a wank?
One thing for sure- if it was Michael Moore, it wouldn't be a Southern Right Whale- more like a Northern Left.
(If a tissue scan reveals traces of truffles and Bollinger, it's probably Phillip Adams).
Posted by: paul bickford at July 3, 2003 at 04:52 PMGod put Michael Moore on the earth so that normal people could explain to rabid right-wingers what is wrong with Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity.
And now he's calamari!
Posted by: Mork at July 3, 2003 at 05:59 PMMichael Moore = rich, fat, white man that makes a living by criticising these characteristics.
Posted by: Random_Prose at July 3, 2003 at 06:48 PMSuperficially Michael Moore is a sloppy slug who would resemble that thing on the beach if someone applied salt to him. But, deep inside that Hutt-like exterior is a cunning manipulator whose ultimate goal is to make money. If he did not live in the America he seems to loathe he would not be able to make money in the way he does. Try to imagine the French, Germans or any other Europeans paying to watch and listen to one of their own ridicule them so. (The Brits maybe, or the Aussies - can they still be considered European? - but not the non-English speakers.)
Ultimately, Moore has become what he claims to abhor, a fat cat making money at the expense of others.
Posted by: ZsaZsa at July 3, 2003 at 07:51 PMi don't think it's him; this creatures appears to have bathed...
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at July 3, 2003 at 10:12 PMFor an intelligent journalist Tim, your points are rather petty and childish. I'm sure you have some physical defect, but you don't see Michael Moore posting in a blog 'Wow, Tim Blair has erectile disfunction problems'...
Posted by: Ben Lewis at July 3, 2003 at 10:15 PMI haven't heard Ben's wife complaining about Tim's "erectile disfunction problems". Must be a non-issue.
Posted by: ZsaZsa at July 3, 2003 at 11:59 PMwell, mork, according to ben there's not much to share...
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at July 4, 2003 at 01:45 AMConsidering that it's such a "non-issue", those Barking Moonbat Acolytes of Mickey's sure DO seem to get all riled up about it whenever anybody makes fun of it, no?
Posted by: Emperor Misha I at July 4, 2003 at 03:36 AMI liked CNN's name for the thing: Octopus Giganteus.
Perhaps the title alone could suffice for Mr. Moore. I mean, really, who needs pictures?
hln
Posted by: hln at July 4, 2003 at 03:50 AMahhh yes, the always amusing Michael Moore is fat. Ha ha ha ha routine. Always a winner. Come on Tim, you gotta do better than that. You're sinking (even further) into the depth of mediocrity.
Posted by: Andy at July 4, 2003 at 01:12 PMTim's playing to an audience and having some fun at the expenses of a hypocrit, so what? Last year you could have replaced "Moore" with a certain Kim Beazley (how did that man end up with such a yummy mummy wife?).
Posted by: Jake D at July 4, 2003 at 02:47 PMAnd only last week SNL reran their hysterical spoof of Donahue, starring Michael Moore being asked if he ever bathes, Al Sharpton telling Donahue that the reason his show has low ratings is because nobody watches him, and just when you think it couldn't get any funnier, they brought in Barbra Streisand, misquoting the number of Americans in prison (It's not 40% of the population?)
And I'm a LIBERAL and I fell on the floor laughing.
Posted by: Meryl Yourish at July 4, 2003 at 03:25 PMDear all,
Loved all the razor sharp wit and ROFL commentary - this is sincere, btw!
Best laugh I've had in ages. This site is great entertainment - such value for money!
Keep it rolling, folks.
Shalom,
Karen
Tim,
Glad you're at least intelligent enough to create your own metaphor
Sad that you have to insult someone in the process
Posted by: 3rd world apricot at July 8, 2003 at 01:56 PM