June 30, 2003


We backed a winner with this guy. Jake Ryan phoned this morning to offer an astonished thanks to everybody who contributed to the Beer Fund, and he turns out to be funny, clever, and completely overwhelmed by the generosity shown to him. Your Beer Fundage could not be going to a more appreciative person.

(Luckily, he also turns out to be among the tiny percentage of Australians who like beer. The decision not to run a Frozen Yoghurt Fund is vindicated.)

The speech that led to all this was, he says, totally spontaneous, although he was careful not to become too aggressive: The federal police were nice guys, but they warned me that if I jumped the fence [between the spectators and the accused] Id be going home in a coffin.

Hes back home in Queensland now, making plans to spend $1,355 with his mates on a monster night out. Photographs are promised. Send Jake a note. And here are all the people who donated, and whom Jake wants to thank:

Sarah H., Michele, William M., Sean S., Kevin, Daniel R., Michael H., Erik Z., Barbara S., Bernie Slattery, John D., Robert T., Jan S., Damian Penny, Ernie G., James L., Kristin D., William T., Ronald M., Debra L., Scott Wickstein, Jake D & Miss Noosa, Tim A., Chris U., Mark S., Oscar Jr., Ken B., Steve B., David L., Ricky Dardenne, Scott W., Ian F., John Y., Roger Bournival, Michael S., Charles H., Kevin M., Professor Bunyip, Gordon K., Ed F., Silent Running, Jim C., Ward A., Michael B., Charles Austin, Andrew M., Jack Strocchi, Gary S., John H., Gary Gravett, Scott S., Paul Bickford, Maurice T., Benjamin R., Andrew Lloyd, Robert A., Michael L., Tony the Teacher, Hedley T., Michael Jennings, Stephen S., Paul S., James W., Brian J., Robert R., Matt C., Silflay Hraka, Guy H., Gerarde A., Ricky D., Stephen S., Charles N., Matthew K., Zsa Zsa, Michael Gebert, James M., Ian F., John S., William B., Andrew M., and Josh Crockett, who variously hail from Victoria, New South Wales, Queensland, Western Australia, South Australia, Philadelphia, New Mexico, Texas, Virginia, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Kentucky, New Jersey, Wyoming, North Carolina, Illinois, Michigan, New York, California, Texas, Virginia, Alabama, Nevada, Florida, Missouri, New Zealand, England, Canada, and Hong Kong.

Lots of people didnt provide an address. Apologies to any slighted states/nations/principalities that participated in the Coalition of the Beering, and my personal thanks to all who supported this little idea. Beer 1, Terror 0.

Posted by Tim Blair at June 30, 2003 07:17 PM

Jake and mates, bottoms up. Wish I could be there to shake your hands.

Posted by: ZsaZsa at June 30, 2003 at 08:08 PM

Thats tops. Cheers to everyone who donated money to the beer fund.I'm also stoked that a bloke donated for some rum (BUNDY of course).Now my brother and i and all the boys can all go out and get pissed and not have to open our wallets.Thanks must go out to everyone at the site and all the donaters, (is donaters a word?) I can quarantee that skulling comps and drinking games will be on the cards. thank you.

Mitch Ryan
Younger brother of Jake

Posted by: mitch ryan at June 30, 2003 at 09:22 PM

To Jake and Co have a good night.

Posted by: Gary at June 30, 2003 at 11:37 PM

Mitch- Us Bundy Bears must stick together. Paint the town red!

Posted by: Scott Wickstein at July 1, 2003 at 01:30 AM

Note to Mitch: you may only spend Wickstein's contribution on rum. From memory, I think he threw in 32 cents - and he demanded a receipt!

Posted by: tim at July 1, 2003 at 01:38 AM

I'm having Coopers on the 4th for you Jake!

And well, for Australia in general. Glad to have you bunch of crazy beer swillin' hooligans on my side!

Posted by: D at July 1, 2003 at 02:06 AM

Knowing how you Australians drink, that $1355 won't make the night of debauchery any cheaper for these guys -- they'll probably spend an extra $1500 on top of that, too.

Posted by: Andrew at July 1, 2003 at 02:47 AM

"my personal thanks to all who supported this little idea. Beer 1, Terror 0"

And my personal thanks to you, Tim, for handling this "little idea" to fruition. We appreciate the opportunity to show our support in this small way.

And may it be "Beer 1000, Terror 0"!

Posted by: Barbara Skolaut at July 1, 2003 at 03:14 AM

I demanded a receipt from TIM... I've seen photos of Tim on the turps... (mind you this was when Tony the Teacher was still drinking, so he has an excuse)

Posted by: Scott Wickstein at July 1, 2003 at 05:21 AM

It appears that contributions came from every state I lived in except Florida -- we'll have to speak to Andrea about that -- and every country as well!

Cheers, mates!

Posted by: charles austin at July 1, 2003 at 08:32 AM
"It appears that contributions came from every state I lived in except Florida"

Greetings from Brandon, Florida.

Posted by: Ernie G at July 1, 2003 at 11:14 AM

To all u wonderfull people.

Thanks once again for your generous support for the beer fund. Now u will have to have a 'buy Jake a new liver fund'.
I must thank you for all the kind messages and emails that i have recived.
Tim thank you, it was a pleasure to talk with you and i thank you for the effoet u have put in. This will be no ordinary party, somrthing spexcial, one in a million will be planned. Thanks to all the overseas support. As written i am planning a world tour, and i will try to get in contact with u all when im over your way. My email is therookie22@hotmail.com, so drop me a line. Thanks once again and bottoms up Jake Ryan

Posted by: jake ryan at July 1, 2003 at 12:15 PM

Ok, so I started drinking a little early. My apologies to Ernie G and all the fine people of Brandon, FL, from a former resident of Palm Bay, FL.

Posted by: charles austin at July 1, 2003 at 12:46 PM

To Jake and Mitch,
May I suggest "Coins" as a drinking game, I learned it at Uni and suffered many times for it.
It goes like this:

You need two bourbon glasses, one empty, one for beer and a ten cent piece, and lots and lots of beer (full strength only). The object of the game is to bounce the coin off the table and into the empty glass on said table.

Step 1: Player 1 bounces the coin onto the table, if doesn't go in it's the next player's turn to try, if it does he pours a quarter-glass of beer and nominates another player to drink the beer.

Step 2: The "nominated" drinker must retaliate by rolling the coin off his/her elbow onto the table and bounce it into the glass. If it misses back to step 1, if it goes in the first player must drink (skull) a half-glass of beer.

Step 3: The first player must now roll the coin off his chin onto the table and into the glass. If it misses it's back to step one. If it goes in the "nominated" player must now drink a 3/4 full glass of beer (no sipping allowed).

Step 4: Now the "nominated" player must roll the coin off his/her nose, onto the table etc... If it misses, back to step 1. If it's in the first player must knock back a whole glass. The nominated player can now make up some stupid rule i.e. no pointing, first names etc, punishment is a full-glass skull.

This keeps going ono until no-one can see the coin/glass or you run out of beer (we played in the pub so this never happened).

It's great fun and everyone ends up drunk....mission accomplished.

Posted by: Jake D at July 1, 2003 at 12:56 PM

Waddabout one of you clever moveable types setting Jake up with his own site so he can post from his world trip?

Posted by: slatts at July 1, 2003 at 01:27 PM

i sent young jedi master jake an email tonite saying how proud good folks all over the world are of him and his mates over this, and damned if he didnt write back the nicest message in reply. it made me feel damn good and also made me realize how small the world really is sometimes. i know lots of jakes here in sacramento who, staring at the devil, mighta done the same thing. should people go postal in courtrooms? probably not. but this is different and we're gonna go ahead and give this one a smile a nod and a pass. jake, you're the real deal mate.

Posted by: cali white bear at July 1, 2003 at 03:22 PM

You forgot to mention UMEC™. ;-)

Posted by: kevin at July 1, 2003 at 07:47 PM


Posted by: Mr. Bingley at July 3, 2003 at 06:57 AM