June 21, 2003


Stupid New Zealand signed the Kyoto Protocol and now the country is brawling over who should pay for it:

New Zealand farmers are being asked to cough up $7.33 million a year to help reduce greenhouse effects caused by flatulence of their millions of sheep and cattle - and they say the plan stinks.

Farmers argue that reducing greenhouse gas emissions benefits everyone so the costs should be spread across all taxpayers.

Go to hell, farmer dude! Why should vegan taxpayers perpetuate your cruel exploitation of livestock? Donít make others pay for your ... your ... hate meat!

Posted by Tim Blair at June 21, 2003 03:05 AM

Thanks for making me laugh out loud for the first time today. Hopefully followed by many more!

Posted by: D at June 21, 2003 at 06:15 AM

I suspect this dumb study they are doing is really aimed at giving them something to point at when asked, "are you abiding by the Kyoto treaty?" And to allow them to get all self-righteous about it: "See, where doing OUR part..."

Posted by: Tim Shell at June 21, 2003 at 06:54 AM

It's a stupid tax. But the farmering lobbyists quoted appear to have been have fallen out of a cow's arse themselves. 'Da Gummint' should pay for this! they cry. And where do you think they get their money from?

Oy and vey... Stop huffing the methane guys and put up a serious market argument.

Posted by: Craig Ranapia at June 21, 2003 at 09:13 AM

I'm past caring *what* happens to Australia's Canada.

Posted by: Zimriel at June 21, 2003 at 10:13 AM

And they laughed at Reagan when he spoke of the dangers of cow farts. He always gets the last laugh . . .

Posted by: Sharkman at June 21, 2003 at 10:48 AM

The big problem people ave had with it on the radio is that australia the USA etc havent ratified the treaty yet it has not reached the 55% mark. so therefore NZ is not even enforcing the kyoto protocol it is just passing a cow fart tax.
Hmm If no one else will do it NZ will save the world all by itself.. al we have to do is reduce our emissions by 1000000%

Posted by: scottie at June 21, 2003 at 10:54 AM

Even organic production of vegetables produce "greenhouse gases", so no exemption for vegans (and what about their personal production of methane, CO2 etc- all those mung beans stewing away are major gas producers). If anyone should have to pay surely it should be the mutants who believe in global warming. I wish we could get some global warming happening here at the moment- it's colder than a witch's tit.

Posted by: paul bickford at June 21, 2003 at 12:12 PM

I'm hungry now - anyone up for steak and salad? Promise not to fart.

Posted by: Craig Ranapia at June 21, 2003 at 12:39 PM

We're doing some cutting edge things with natural gas and methane technology here in Texas. My suggestion is to hook the butts of the beasts to flexible tubing, and send to the flatulence to a gas processor. Methane [the flatulence] is basically what you cook with.

Posted by: Wallace at June 21, 2003 at 02:24 PM

I saw an article on Silent Running months ago about scientists trying to see if a organism found in the kangaroo can be put in cows. Apparently despite the fact kangaroos and cows eat the same grass, the kangaroo's gas has little or no methane. Guess that research could ask for a bit more funding, get it in sheep too. Methane free cattle. Crikey, we really are god if we can make an organism more enviromentally friendly and fuel efficient.

Posted by: Ken at June 21, 2003 at 02:35 PM

The big problem people ave had with it on the radio is that australia the USA etc havent ratified the treaty yet it has not reached the 55% mark.

No and yes. Dunno about the Aussies, but the US is not going to ratify Kyoto as it is currently written. However, Japan did sign on, and that was enough to meet the threshold to bring it into effect- as far as Kyoto is concerned, what the US does or doesn't do is irrelevant, NZ signed on, and now they either have to comply with the terms or repudiate it.

The Kiwis are going to have to learn to walk the walk, and not just talk the talk.

Posted by: rosignol at June 21, 2003 at 03:17 PM

I'm still pissed at them for denying port access to our Navy during the eighties, seems they didn't want any ships carrying nukes to enter their waters. We didn't and still don't publicly state which ships are carrying nukes, for obvious reasons. The effect was banning all US Naval vessels from NZ. They may have backed away from that over the years, truthfully I don't know what their current policy is on that.

I just know that they are not reliable trustworthy friends, so I choose them not to be friends at all. My great grandfather was killed in a fued, I know how to hold a grudge.

Posted by: puggs at June 22, 2003 at 07:11 AM

Paul Bickford has a very valid point.

Vegetarians - due to their dangerously high consumption levels of lentils and other pulses - are one of Earth's major methane producers.

While banning smoking in areas where vegetarians tend to congregate has reduced public safety risks, they would naturally be the first group to target if Australia had any hope of complying with the Kyoto Protocol.

Posted by: The at June 22, 2003 at 04:21 PM

Why not just reduce the salaries/perks of the pols who want Kyoto? They want it, they pay for it.

Posted by: John Anderson at June 23, 2003 at 07:13 AM

As at today there aren't 55% of annexed countries (Kyoto Sigs) to bring the Protocol into effect.
Still requires Russia or some other large net emitter.
Russia still watching the US as they would like to sell the biggest emitter carbon trades. It is a funny paradox that the eastern European countries had the dirtiest industries at 1990 and therefore have the easiest targets. As is the case with many environmental issues poor environmental performance can be rewarded. It may be some relief to know that most abatement measures are painless if production efficiencies accompany them. Simple question for Australia - are we prepared to shut down Latrobe Valley (brown coal) Electricity generation and pay the price for more expensive sources of power. I think not!

Posted by: Gus McGown at June 23, 2003 at 08:56 AM

Reduce methane gasses, eat more meat.Yum, pass the side of beef , dear, I'm hungry.

Of course, if the greenies are consistent, then along with wild pig and buffalo, we'll have to go out and shoot every kangaroo, wallaby, womabat, koala. elk, moose, dear, impala, lion -I suspect they fart a lot, elephant - they produce heaps of stinking shit, hippotumus -who crap up rivers too boot, rhinos, giraffes, monkeys -they crap in every forest, birds- their stinks aren't sucked into some eco-friendly air-freshining machine. Many bugs produce a lot of faeces too.
Then there are lizards, mia cats, fish, whales, dolphins - goody - get to shoot a few at last, crocodiles,.... oh what an endless list.. So what is left.Nothing really, but hey, at least the atmosphee will be methane free.

Hold that fart in greenies, your're poisoning my oxygen.

Posted by: d at June 23, 2003 at 05:03 PM